Little Chinese Police Girl Scared To Death On TV Show

A scared little Chinese girl cries on a Jiangsu Television show.

This video has been very popular recently, spreading on popular discussion forums, social networking websites like Kaixin001, and microblogging service Sina Weibo. It is from a show on Jiangsu Television and this one copy on Youku has already been viewed over 3.8 million times:Here is our copy (with our translated subtitles) on YouTube:

Below is our transcript and translation:

POLICEWOMAN:
This is the weapon he used to commit the crime.
I’ll put it here for now.
I have some business to take care of and must leave for a while.
This criminal I’ll leave to you guys to watch.
Don’t let him escape, okay?

LITTLE BOY & GIRL IN POLICE UNIFORMS:
Okay. ["Scared" graphic appears by girl's face]

POLICEWOMAN:
I’m going to leave the key here, you mustn’t let him get a hold of it, okay?

CRIMINAL IN BLACK MASK:
She’s gone.
She’s gone.
She’s gone.

LITTLE GIRL:
Don’t run!
[I] told you to not move!

CRIMINAL:
How many years have you two been police?

LITTLE GIRL:
[nervous] What?

CRIMINAL:
How many years have you been police?

LITTLE GIRL:
[crying] Don’t kill me!
You’re a good person!
When you speak, don’t sound too mean, okay?

CRIMINAL:
I don’t sound mean when I speak.

LITTLE GIRL:
[cries]
Okay, don’t be scary, okay?
I’m so scared!

CRIMINAL:
Little police officer, let’s just talk, okay?
Just let me say something.

LITTLE GIRL:
Are you a good person?

CRIMINAL:
I- I- I am a good person.
They arrested the wrong person.
Let me go, okay?

LITTLE GIRL:
No way, no way, no way!
She told me to watch over you.

CRIMINAL:
Yeah, but she arrested the wrong person, I’m a good person.
How about this, police officer?
You let me go, okay?

LITTLE GIRL:
[swallows] I doesn’t matter if you are a good person or a bad person you need to stay locked up.

CRIMINAL:
[graphic "But I am innocent~"] But if I am a good person, why lock me up?
I was just outside helping an old lady cross the road
But she says I am trying to steal the old lady’s purse.
Now she has arrested me and this isn’t right.

LITTLE GIRL:
It’s right!

CRIMINAL:
I’m just helping an old lady cross the street, so why did she arrest me?

LITTLE GIRL:
She’s acting! [graphic: "It's for television~"]
When the acting is done, you’ll be released.
If you don’t believe me, just wait and see, okay?

CRIMINAL:
I’m telling you,
this is my weapon, [graphic: Red Wolf asking "Flat bottom pan?"]
do you know who I am? [coughs]

LITTLE GIRL:
[wailing] He’s escaping!

LITTLE BOY:
[graphic] Resist/fight back!

CRIMINAL:
Wait, why are you afraid of me holding a pan? [graphic: "I haven't even hit you yet"]

LITTLE GIRL:
Let’s sit down and talk,
please don’t hit me, okay?

CRIMINAL:
That’s fine, that’s fine, will you free me?

LITTLE GIRL:
I can’t, I don’t know how to open handcuffs.

CRIMINAL:
How could you not know how to open handcuffs?!
I’m getting angry!

LITTLE GIRL:
Don’t get angry! I’m scared!
I’m a cowardly person!

CRIMINAL:
You give me the key.
Where’s the key?

LITTLE BOY:
That’s the key right there.

CRIMINAL:
The key. Give it to me. Yes.

LITTLE GIRL:
Please speak a little more kindly, is that okay?

CRIMINAL:
This is the key, right? Let me see.
This is fine too, I’ll do it myself.

LITTLE GIRL:
Hey, don’t handcuff me, I’m scared.

CRIMINAL:
I will handcuff him to the chair.

POLICEWOMAN:
[graphic: "The police are coming!"] Why are you standing?!
Sit down! Sit down!

LITTLE GIRL:
[in response to the policewoman taking the criminal away] Okay, okay, okay.
You go with her.

Next Scene: STRANGE COUPLE

WOMAN:
Police officer, [pointing] he just slapped me twice.

MAN:
Didn’t we say we weren’t coming here? What are we doing here?

LITTLE GIRL:
[crying] Don’t fight, you two. You guys calm down, okay?
I’m really cold right now.
Let me finish crying before you argue again, okay?

MAN:
What are you crying about?

LITTLE GIRL:
I’m scared.

MAN:
What is there to be scared of?
In broad daylight?

LITTLE GIRL:
Don’t be angry.

MAN:
I’m not angry, I’m not angry.
No, the matter is like this, police comrade,
I as an artist am bound to have some unrestrained ideas,
and I will want to go put those ideas into practice.
But the moment I go put them into practice, she–

WOMAN:
Give me a break, what are you putting into practice?
All day looking like a devil, is this putting anything into practice?
Tell me, you guys, does he look like a man?

LITTLE GIRL:
He- he- he’s like a woman, his hair is even draped.

WOMAN:
You see, the police officer even says you look like a woman.

MAN:
[brushing his hair back] This, how is this like a woman?
This is an artist’s hair, don’t you know?
An artist must have his own style.

LITTLE BOY:
This is not an artist’s hair, it’s a police officer’s hair.

WOMAN & MAN:
[confused]

WOMAN:
He doesn’t do anything at home.
May I ask if people in your family help out at home?

LITTLE GIRL:
[nodding] They do.

WOMAN:
Do they help with a lot?

LITTLE GIRL:
They help with quite a lot. [graphic: "About to cry again"]

WOMAN:
Right, they help with quite a lot, right?

MAN:
[interrupting] I’m busy! It isn’t that I don’t want to help out…

WOMAN:
You’re busy?

MAN:
With my time, most of my time is spent creating!

WOMAN:
You’re begging to be beaten, you!

LITTLE BOY:
Both of you are begging to be beaten the way I see it!

WOMAN:
But I can’t go on with him any long, really.

LITTLE GIRL:
[reflective] Can’t go on…
For a woman…
this is called long-suffering [being patient, enduring], you understand, right?
You have already given [so you can't afford to give up now]…

MAN:
[triumphant] It was right to come here! Even the police say so. A woman must give.

WOMAN:
[crying] Even you are helping him bully/exploit me,
why are you helping him bully/exploit me?!

LITTLE GIRL:
I’m not afraid of you.

WOMAN:
Then you want me to do all these things by myself!
I’m going to beat you to death!
[accidentally removes MAN's wig]
Look, look, look!

LITTLE GIRL:
This is, this is a wig!
[pointing at the wig] You guys, you guys…

WOMAN:
He is a man yet he’s always wearing this thing, tell me…

MAN:
[pleading] Let’s go home first, let’s go home first.

LITTLE GIRL:
Hey, can you guys take this wig with you, okay?

LITTLE BOY:
This hair is so lousy.

LITTLE GIRL:
[It's] pretty.

Next Scene: GREY WOLF

GREY WOLF:
Hi you two!
Do you know who I am?

LITTLE BOY:
Grey Wolf!

LITTLE GIRL:
[scared/afraid]

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  • Alejandro

    别杀我啊!!! (then cries)

  • Chloe

    omg…..

    authoritarian regime….

    training kids to see the world as good v. bad. and police officers are always good, those arrested always bad…

    • Tuldga

      you’re just dumb.
      it’s a kids program… and for some reason the girl got scared. happens everywhere. what has “authoritarian” regime to do with it?

      • Strangerland

        True, it’s unnecessary to label them being “trained” to see world as good Vs bad and that police officer always “good”- if we can’t trust the police to keep a society safe and obey the rules then who? The Mafia? The criminals?
        While world doesn’t always divided into black&white, it doesn’t meant you can label everything gray/in-between.
        And if only this program was from any other country but China, would you still comment that it’s “training program” for kids?
        Stop being so suspicious and enjoy the laugh, and maybe you will be reminded of what being innocent and seeing things through kids’ eyes meant. Maybe if such innocence never lost as we grow up, then adults wouldn’t cause such a mess in the world today….

        • bert

          It isn’t necessary to make to girl scared and crying for 6 minutes for our entertainment. That seems a bit cruel.

          It is typical to hear the occasional throat hawking by the ‘criminal’. At one point I think you can hear him spit. Nice!

          • Strangerland

            Hm….from what I came to understand, it’s not the crying-baby contest or who can make the kids cry louder kind of contest. The two kids know they’re in television and doing some acting- they know the police and the criminal are actors(that’s why during one of the scene the little girl told the criminal actor to talk to her in a gentler language- since he is a “good” person- not a real criminal)
            I’m sure the crying part is out of script, can be the surprise factor, but they decided to let it be aired and not cut it down because it is similar to reality-life television that was popular several years ago. What they want to show was how these two kids reacted to such situation, and admit it or not various kids will have various reactions to similar situation.
            Besides, if you see it from the fact that the little girl is crying then yes it is not too-nice a show. But I don’t see it from that angle. What I see is the fact that these kids are not holding themselves and showing their true-opinion freely, something that adults are lacking. They don’t pretend, they react in natural way and that is the “funny” factor. It’s not the crying part that’s supposed to be funny. Maybe subconciously, adults are supposedly reminded of how they were back then, when they’re not weighed down by the need to pretend, hiding their true opinions inside for the sake of compromise, or even hiding behind masks everyday.
            That’s what I see in the show(because I admitted, I can see my previous-self in the little girl). In the end, people see what they want to see. I try to keep thinking positive about this program, and each to their own anyway.

    • Marx

      Excellent point.. Life is never so black and white..

    • Ocetalo

      This has nothing to do with China or authoritarian regimes art all, this is about kids. Any little kid from every country (even the U.S. or the European) may react the same way. Kids are kids everywhere. Any innocent, naive child sees the world in black & white and thinks everything has to be either good or bad. Only later, through experience, we find the gray areas.

  • http://simonlenvilleworld.blogspot.com/ Siming

    Someone steals my sofa?
    I got chair this time!

  • http://www.matthewsawtell.com Matthew A. Sawtell

    Have to love live television – there is no way to script this sort of cute sillyness.

  • disgrace

    Traumatizing a little girl, what assholes.

  • HandleMyLovePump

    I didn’t understand any of that. Maybe she’d have been more scared if you’d have shown here the BDSM dungeon in the previous article and introduced her to a ten inch black dildo.

  • HandleMyLovePump

    I just realised. At about 5 seconds into the clip – the kid DOES show her a ten inch black dildo.

  • Regina

    The guy in the wig was effing hot.

  • Alikese

    I like that the boy is laughing the whole time, even when being threatened with a frying pan. Balls of steel.

    • crackedbamboo

      Balls of steel eh? Seemed to me they were just preparing for roles as adults where women at least try to take control of stressful situations while men laugh nervously as it unfolds.
      Completely heartless and unimaginative. Apparently you can’t get the same sort of “cute sillyness” with a petty crime, say with a stolen ice cream or a drunken Haibao. No, throw in a masked criminal with a weapon. You could tell the guy immediately had to tone down his role because it was so terrifying for the girl. I hope the whole lot of them feel ashamed, but it would be too much to ask. Next time they’ll make it a knife because children are silly cutie-pies who don’t know the difference and are always good for a laugh.

      Not. funny. at. all.

      • anon

        Any men want to object to this characterization of how women and men react to stressful situations?

        • Ocetalo

          I guess we don’t want.

      • Alikese

        He wasn’t laughing nervously, he was biding his time until the criminal tried something. Then he was going to kick some ass.

        Big difference, crackedbamboo.

        • crackedbamboo

          Totally agree. The girl clearly shows the boy that she has bigger balls than he does, and simply leaves him to finish up the job if he can find his own to man up.
          In fact, the only difference is that the girl is strong enough to take control, and the other is too dumb to recognize that he needs to see how courage, not cowardice, handles a dangerous situation.
          Evaluation complete, carry on.

  • cliffinchina

    too cute. hopefully this girl doesn’t grow up traumatized…

  • beowulf

    Six postings already and and no hate speech? Whats wrong with the internet?

    • Alikese

      Go back to Scandinavia Beowulf, you damn Swedish meatball!

      • beowulf

        next time you buy something at ikea remember that there is a high chance that somebody spit on your newly bought bedcover ;-)

  • MMary

    Traumatising children is always a fun activity – NOT!!
    That child cried with fear as she thought she was going to be killed! What idiot thought this would be funny?
    This clip explains why most mainlanders have fucked-up attitudes to almost everything.

    • Peter in China

      MMary please shut the fuck up with your anti mainlander attitude. It’s not really needed.

      • bert

        In this situation it is.

        • Tadd

          Is it Bert? Is it really?

          Jesus, I’m ashamed to be called a “westerner” with all your bubble-wrapped kids.

          For all you U.K folks out there (who I’m sure are chilling and being generally awesome), do you remember “Beadles About” starring Jeremy Beadle? Now how about that guy for a mind-fuck?

          How about all the countless uploaded videos of children getting pranked with those ‘screamer’ videos? How about the hordes of kids getting ‘owned’ and ‘failing’ being uploaded for OUR entertainment?

          Is it Bert? Is it really fucking needed? Think again.

    • PING

      Read the subtitle, please. The kid knew it was a act for TV show but just cannot help to be scared. Come on even grown man can be scared when watching horror film.

      And,

      Give it a rest.

  • dim mak

    That is not funny ;_;

    • anon

      1 part pure innocence + 2 parts Subei dialect = reasonably funny. The interesting thing is that the girl (and the boy) seems to know she’s on a show and people are acting, yet is still so scared. That is admittedly a bit worrisome.

      • crackedbamboo

        Ok, I see what you’re doing there. The little girl was stupid enough to be terrified by something she knew was staged. To this hilarity we can add the Subei dialect, always good for a laugh. An innocent girl and her dork of a brother, plucked and placed into a situation for the entertainment of us all. But how “innocent it all is”. How funny that Shanghainese, the audience makeup, would so easily ‘get it’. Those silly Subei people, ignorant as fuck all. Ha ha.
        Anon, fuck your attempt to intellectualize this under some abstract idea of innocence and linguistic complexity.
        They exploited young children to promote their grey wolf whatever the fuck. Shame on them. Not cute. Not creative. Not compassionate. And funny only to the most callous among us all.

        • anon

          Humor is difficult to define. I think part of why many people find this video funny is trying to figure out why the little girl is so scared, especially if she seems to know people are acting. Does she only think some of the people are acting? Is she really sheltered? What’s the deal?

          Dialect is a common device for humor in Chinese comedy, which is actually not that different from many other places. It isn’t about linguistic complexity and I’m not sure why you think that. The bottom line is that her Subei dialect just makes her cuter to those viewers who don’t speak the Subei dialect. Just as Americans find the Southern drawl to be funny, so do Chinese people from different parts of the country. Apparently, this isn’t something you can appreciate. Similarly, you probably wouldn’t understand why many Japanese find people from Osaka to sound amusing to their ears either. It’s just the way it is and most of the time, it’s pretty harmless.

          I’m also not sure why you think the audience makeup is Shanghainese though it certainly includes some. Jiangsu television serves over 100 million viewers in the region and I’m pretty certain most of them are not Shanghainese. Maybe you’re making too many assumptions? I’m not even sure what you’re basing those assumptions on though. It just seemed to come out of nowhere.

          Whatever, you didn’t find it funny or cute, etc. Thanks for letting us know. Carry on.

          • seitch

            Ok so it was the little girl who had the Subei accent? So what accent did the theif have then?

          • anon

            Sounds like Shandong.

        • http://baihaifeng.blogspot.com Dr. Jones Jr.

          Audience makeup wasn’t Shanghainese. Actually, this was filmed in Nanjing.

  • Harrison

    Does this kind of thing happen in other countries? Can anyone tell me?

    I think I have seen something like this before but I’m not sure if it was also from China or not…

    • Mosanto

      In the west, there’s no way they would make a child cry on TV for our entertainment. I’ve never seen that anyway.

      • Tadd

        How about all the countless uploaded videos of children getting pranked with those ‘screamer’ videos? How about the hordes of kids getting ‘owned’ and ‘failing’ being uploaded for OUR entertainment?

      • Bchung

        Obviously someone got their head up their asses too long…. watch AFV before? Asshole?

      • http://www.chinasmack.com Fauna

    • mankouzanghua

      America’s Funniest Home Videos.

    • anon

      Thought of this post when I saw this on Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vqq_cAz_PPY

      It’s really cute too.

  • no name

    this wasn’t funny at all. almost 4 million hits. no wonder their IQ seems absent. i’m not even thinking about traumatizing the girl. I just think this is dumb and boring. wow scaring a kid with a criminal and a weapon made her cry. wow. who would have known. mmary is 100% right.

  • whichone

    *Sigh* I have no sense of humor and find everything dumb and boring. I insinuate I have a higher IQ then Chinese people but fail to use understand basic grammar. I am not creative enough to come with a handle and “anonymous” is just too damn difficult to spell.

    I should really stop taking things so seriously.

    I like the word “wow” alot.

    • whichone

      Timely combination of irony + idiotic posting = me a douchebag…shouldn’t have posted that.

      • anon

        Good effort nonetheless.

  • Wago

    I wonder what happened afterwards with Grey Wolf, he’s always scheming things…

    • crackedbamboo

      See that right there. That’s some funny shit.

  • kaf

    bad translation

  • Regina

    What’s with Asian people’s obsession with making children cry and be scared? Seen this shit too many times in Japan and now China’s jumping on board. I just don’t see the humor. It’s much more funny to me when a grown adult cries and acts like a wimp than when a child does.

    But hey, this isn’t surprising to me. Asians are always amused by the simplest of things. Sometimes even the most sadistic of things. Which some of these “let’s scare children half to death and have them cry and shit their pants on national television” videos kind of are.

  • C Mao

    My wife was watching this a days ago and I think she wet herself she laughed so much….

  • xmcx

    To me, the background music is the ending credits of Japanese manga anime “Gyagu Manga Biyori” or “Gag Manga Today”, an outrageously funny and sort of innovative offering from that glorious worm always out of peck’s reach. So… how come it’s on mainland TV? Or am I wrong, is that tune originally from somewhere else? Btw, not funny and the happy sheep and nasty wolf cartoon isn’t either. Roadrunner was funnier with fewer words. Is it because Wile E. Coyote didn’t have a nagging money whore at home?

    • Eeeehhh

      I thought Wile E Coyote’s humor is too predictable and not funny. I want that road runner roasted.

  • http://baihaifeng.blogspot.com Dr. Jones Jr.

    Haha, my fiancee was at the taping of this show (the parts where the kids are on stage/competing, not the parts where the kids are dressed up as police officers). Amazing to see that this has gone viral!

  • posterknowasB-real

    Wrong, but still cute kids. hahahahahahahahah

  • promo

    Ya’ll negative people need to get some sense of humour. It’s called entertainment. No one was tortured here, no one was hurt. So what’s with the criticisms? Just try to laugh it off ! JEez!

  • huitailang

    Whole video here. Watch after the 29 min mark http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjExMDQ3Mjcy.html

  • Michael Wu

    Assholes. That girl is brave and I hope in a few years she kicks their asses. One thing is sure, if anyone’s running the city, it will be her, not the adults.

  • Cleo

    It’s hard to imagine the Japanese slashing away at our terrified children without some kind of visual aid or reenactment.

  • Jman

    This reminds me of the Goonies, what was that fat kids name? chuck? when he starts crying in front of the Fratelli criminal dude and is like dont kill me.

  • 冷迈奇

    Zombies are much more difficult to deal with.

    http://theawesomer.com/kids-vs-zombie/66282/

  • jin

    wow and just wow im amazed about some comments.
    1. average chinese IQ is 100 (hongkong is 107 highest average IQ in the world.) while average american IQ is 98.
    top 6 smartest country is ASIA.
    2. americas funniest home videos… hmm guess those kids were just stupid in those videos. or maybe china made them?
    3. posting without thinking is what some retards do. act first then think. guess you got a slow brain.

    • MMary

      wow, I’m just amazed at some people’s lack of independent and unbiased research. It’s actually pretty common knowledge that IQ testing is outdated and unreliable.
      1. http://www.guidetopsychology.com/testing.htm.
      http://www.topix.com/forum/world/saudi-arabia/T4V1UD4G0PMD703L3
      2. Like funniest home videos all over the world – the people are probably just caught in a stupid moment – as what happens to all peoples at some time in their lives. It just seems like so many are Americans because they own/carry/use cameras more than others.
      3. I can’t even grace that with a response.

      • Bchung

        O really? You gotta to be the biggest dumb bitch there is. Caught up in a stupid moment my fucking ass, plenty of those vids were made and spook kids intentionally.

        • MMary

          Big? No
          Biggest? Not even close.
          Bitch? When required.
          Lesson? Research first fool boy.

          Yes, many ‘home videos’ from ALL OVER THE WORLD feature stupid people filming tormented children, as well as people having accidents. Yes, there are stupid people all over the world – not just China.
          I do not condone this and know many people who refuse to watch ‘Funniest Home Videos’ for this very reason.
          However, you are comparing HOME videos to television productions created by supposed professional adults.

          ….and now you’re gonna say “Stupid bitch! Who do you think produces ‘Funniest Home videos?’
          So to save you the effort, consider this;
          One of these groups is a room full of guys watching public submissions at 4:20, and the other is a group of writers/producers/hosts (obviously no child behavioural consultant).

  • InstantNoodles

    The little girl watches too much TV, going by some of the things she says.

    I wonder how else her parents educated her, seeing how easily the child is upset.

  • Andy

    whoa this makes me feel a lot better after watching a video on raccoons being skinned alive.

  • Science Patrol

    Their different personalities are so evident even at such a young age. Cute kids.

  • Science Patrol

    This is how you do it.

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