Pictures

Used Condom Found in Food at School Cafeteria

by on Tuesday, September 20, 2011 74 comments comments

From Mop:

Free condom with meal, school’s cafeteria is so awesome

A used condom in the food at a Chinese school cafeteria.

A used condom in the food at a Chinese school cafeteria.

A used condom filled with semen found in the food at a Chinese school cafeteria.

A used condom filled with semen found in the food at a Chinese school cafeteria.

Comments from Mop:

丶7七柒:

Truly gei li
Requesting school’s name.

纠结中淡定:

How many bites have you already taken?

熬真的是巴马:

It’s nutritious, I think they were giving you extra.

草帽下的帥气:

With one bite, the lou zhu, consumed so many hundreds of millions.

你的媚笑依然:

That TT is even a used one.

小懶貓_小灰:

= =、Whoa, a used one – - And it’s even tied.

358503059:

Fuck, take it home, wash it and it can be used again.

属鼠照样上猫扑: (responding to above)

Yep, apparently you can still use it even if you don’t wash it too.

elephantyn:

Birth control begins with the mouth~~~~~~~~~~~~

注册就为爆楼主:

Given the temperatures of cooked rice and vegetables, the fact that this TT can still keep its original color…
I can only say that either its one the lou zhu himself used and threw into [the food] or this TT isn’t made of latex.

拼了命沉默:

Too fake. Just amusing yourselves.

丶毫无期待:

Lou zhu eats it every night, is used to it. If it weren’t for the condom being obvious, he probably wouldn’t have tasted it at all.

What is the worst thing you have personally found in your found that did not belong there?

  • http://candosino.wordpress.com terroir

    I think Chinese cuisine haven’t yet mastered the use of “salad dressing”. You’re supposed to take the mayonnaise out of the packaging first.

    • Tengu

      That is one nasty find, if it’s legit.

      If it is legit then it’s probably a one off and done purposely.

      Old joke about a guy who breaks into a sperm bank…too long for here!

      • Just John

        Next, we will find out how they make ketchup…

        • Tengu

          Ewwww…I have a very delicate constitution….my irritable bowel syndrome is starting to act up, my restless leg syndrome is going into over drive and I see a “weak stream” in my future.

          Sadly I’ve known you long enough to not even ask about the “ketchup ” origins….I already now what lurks in those crevasses!!!!!!!

          • Just John

            Well, you know, just saying.
            If this is the mayonnaise, then…

      • Just John

        Next, we will find out how they make ketchup…

        • Tengu

          Ewwww…I have a very delicate constitution….my irritable bowel syndrome is starting to act up, my restless leg syndrome is going into over drive and I see a “weak stream” in my future.

          Sadly I’ve known you long enough to not even ask about the “ketchup ” origins….I already now what lurks in those crevasses!!!!!!!

      • Brett Hunan

        Every oyster has its pearl.

    • Just John

      Now we know their “special sauce” secret recipe.

      • jiayi

        More like ‘man-onnaise.’

        If this is real I just puked a little in my mouth.

        If it is fake: LOLOLOL.

        • Tengu

          Since it’s China wouldn’t it be “mao-nnaise

  • Justin

    yeah, I gotta call bullshit on this one.

    • Tengu

      Shenanigans?????????

      • Brett Hunan

        Could be a prank. My buddies used to fuck around with condoms all the time. Hock a loogie in them and pass it off as real.

      • Brett Hunan

        Could be a prank. My buddies used to fuck around with condoms all the time. Hock a loogie and pass it off as the real thing.

    • Just John

      Have to say, I agree with you.

      • Tengu

        Terroir’s favorite word in stations like this,….I’m a recycler!

    • 平凡人

      I agree, sounds like a setup. I struggle to believe.

      • Tengu

        Don’t struggle too hard.

        Hooots and I struggled to figure out something Just John said one time and we hurt ourselves…

        • Just John

          lol, are you still tripping on:

          “DIE! DIE!
          CONCUBINE!”

          Don’t ask me, I agree with Hoots, a dead concubine seems like a waste, unless, as mentioned in the Mao sperm story, you are trying to prevent a future Mao, Hitler, etc.

          Just a song I put up because I wanted to see how he would react, given his words about Amy Grant and “finer music taste”. It was the most extreme song from that particular group I could think of. If you look up Otep – Possession, it is actually pretty good. Or watch their video T.R.I.C. I love her lips in that one (Of course, the video is pretty disturbing in other areas).

          Actually, I do consider then one of the “finer” things. Not because of the style they play in, but because they are a rarity – A metal band with a political message (sometimes I agree, sometimes I think she is an idiot), instead of just the horror induced lyrics. I am pretty eclectic, and listen to everything from Britney to Cradle of Filth. Bach to Beastie Boys.

          Anyways, enough from me, I am out.

      • Magda Carter
        • Tengu

          I think I’m in love…(please be a female!)

          We can elope with Hoots and eattot!!!!!!!

    • Irvin

      fake fake fake!

      School cafe’s food is the cleanest in china.

      • hooots

        hahaha yeah, it looks like you’re right. At least they used a condom. Keepin it clean, keepin it clean.

    • bjkid

      oh thee unbelievers. open your eyes..
      this is really a victimless crime, except this time they forgot to unwrap it first.

  • AD23

    Damn I was eating at a Chinese cafeteria this summer… Next time I’ll pass

    • http://candosino.wordpress.com terroir

      Swill oil or used condoms – your choice.

      (And) Note to Fauna: please do the “playboy gang wars” story next. That sounds hella hilarious, them showing Compton what a real OG is like, yo.

      • Just John

        huh? I’m confused. I thought you also did stories here terroir.
        I also notice, you do not have a red box today. Did you loose your red box privileges?
        Just give her time man, say it was your fault, and apologize, and you will be out of the dog house and back to translating playboy stories in no time.

  • http://www.qq.com/1325279774 Kedafu

    Song of the Article

    Small Talk
    by Derelict Condom

  • MrT

    Its a very small condom.

    • king Tubby

      Its Chinese, you nitwit!

      Burn Rubber – the Gap Band

    • hooots

      I guess I’ll have to go to Guangzhou to get a decent sized condom. Any friendly smackers in Guangzhou wanna send me a case?

      • Tengu

        “Stars and Bars” boy needs Magnums…show off!

  • hooots

    They have condoms here? Now I know…

    • Irvin

      where’s “here”?

      • hooots

        China, man. China.

    • jiayi

      Silly question, of course they don’t!

      Why buy expensive condoms when you can just cadge a few lamb intestines from the local butcher instead? Albeit, slightly porous. Or even cheaper, just mark your Chinese girlfriend’s ‘safe days’ on your calendar. We all know how effective that is…
      Mind you, a calendar ain’t the cheapest commodity nowadays. Better stick to the sheep entrails.

      • Tengu

        You can an iPhone app called “Petals” to track your girl. One problem is if you forget to deactivate it, you may have some explaining to do with the new girlfriend.

        Word of advice guys…learn from my pain!

    • jin

      trololol china makes more condom in a year than all the other condom factory’s togetter. oh and they export it too :)

      • Tengu

        Yeah, they’re awesome too, they make my dick start to turn bright green and glow in the dark.

        I must say, the glowing in the dark is generally a big hit.

      • hooots

        @obliviousjin:
        I know China makes more condom. I’m just saying that it sucks that people don’t actually use them so many many women must get abortions so they don’t have a baby out of wedlock. That would be tragic. Her family would probably never talk to her again. One of my students once said out of the blue (and no it made no sense in the context):
        “My spirit master has a love child.” You should have heard the gasps and horrible screams…

        I know… “spirit master?” wtf?

        If only China could somehow figure out how to export abortions….. Medical Tourism!!!! Saddle up America! Weez headed to China!! Yeeeeehaaaaawwwww

  • http://chinashmina.com Augis

    I am disappointed not to see some creative link to chinaSMACK Personals from this post.

    • http://candosino.wordpress.com terroir

      Make a strong first impression… with your DNA. Personals @ chinaSMACK.

    • hooots

      Lunchladies. Personals @ chinaSMACK.

    • hooots

      Lunch. Ladies. Personals @ chinaSMACK.

    • Tengu

      Swallow the Future. Personals @ chinaSMACK

  • Jay K.

    Miracle Whip, taste the alternative!

  • lonetrey

    i feel like this is fake…… though gross.

  • Cleo

    OMG – this could happen to a Japanese who relocated to China to start afresh!

    • Tengu

      I love how you drag the Japanese into everything so randomly , yet with such precision and timing. Keep up the good work.

      You mean they’re emigrating from Kyoto to Xi’an?

      • http://candosino.wordpress.com terroir

        Not all Chinese are so Japan-bashing; Liu Chun, VP of Sohu has spoken out against the annual Sept 18 hate-fest against the Japanese.

        And to Cleo: at this point, there are Japanese who have been born, lived, and died and not have cared about the fact that Chinese regard them as a mortal threat.

        The hatred of Japanese is just a political tool, and the supposed eventual invasion of Japan is just a fantasy at this point.

        • cdn icehole

          If there ever was such a plan, they’ll likely avoid the northern region.

        • dr_barefoot

          Totally right. Nationalism in general is a political tool.

          It’s the red button in your head that the gvt pushes when they want you to support their BS or even go to war for it.

          Why be proud of where you were born since it’s a matter of chance? It’s like being proud of being beautiful or sth. Why not just be happy of being where you’re from?

          In this case by hating the Japanese, you demonstrate what a clueless tool of the gvt you’ve become.

  • M.N

    Song of the article
    Usher feat Will.I.Am – OMG

  • dim mak

    Honestly, this one looks staged.

  • Capt. WED

    that’s nasty.

    comments to short?

    Chinasmack U nasty! Defintely not F though I’ll be nasty for her any day. Last week I met someone that looked just like you had to bump myself into her a few times while following for minutes. No I didnt’ bother to actually talk because who needs that when I could after the fact spend quality time in the bathroom, by myself. True story!

  • edward

    i’m suprised no one took the sofa

    • Tengu

      Well, terroir was the first to post…so it would be presumptuous to try to take the throne from the king.

      No matter what his current state, we all remain his loyal subjects.

      We’ll probably mutiny in a few days, but for now we let him bask in the glow of his greatness.

    • http://candosino.wordpress.com terroir

      Some people have class, whereas other people go to class.

      Soon, a chinaSMACK post will have people talking about the value of trolling rather than actually rolling up their sleeves to do an honest’s troll days work.

  • Tengu

    “…it’s sorta-kinda-not-really-like-mayo, but multiplied by awesomeness. You see, we’ve got this bold, tangy flavor that is unlike anything you’ve ever tasted.”

    I tell them that all the time….

  • kevininpudong

    Looks like somebody’s girlfriend won’t need to be giving birth into a toilet!

    • Tengu

      With a brilliant, masterful stroke you tied two stories together!!!!!!!!

      “Check out the big brain on Kevin!!!!!!”

      Nice one!

      • kevinnolongerinpudong

        Indeed, with this brilliant brain of mine, I can’t be wasting my sperm in condoms. That’s why I got a job at this cafeteria, wacking off on each and every dish. Try some real brain food.

    • http://candosino.wordpress.com terroir

      …by eating someone else’s pre-abortion. Yeah. You can still feel it kicking.

      • pada

        Pretty sure it was thrown out from your mouth this morning and wonder how you managed to have held in for so long.

      • Tengu

        Wasn’t there already an article on that a long time ago?

  • nonchalance

    an easy mistake to make. it looks like a fish lung.

  • DRaY

    This is definitely a prank… everyone knows Chinese people don’t fuck using condoms!!

  • http://www.thefartfacts.com theo

    not so cool! but you need to stay at school!

  • shade

    It’s most likely a fake.

  • Brendan

    Yes, I’ll have the cream of sum-yung-gi with sticky (really sticky) rice.
    Hmmm…. several of problems here:
    1. There is zero cat meat in that picture and I doubt it was eaten.
    2. Chinese people eat fucking anything so why would that be singled out as inedible?
    3. The knot is probably to shorten it (like choking up on the bat) but why is it so long?
    4. Chinese folks don’t waste time with condoms–the country busts at the seams with the population, just murders unwanted kids, or sends them to work for WalMart. Problem solved!

    I smell a rat.
    Oh wait, dinner’s done!

  • Jarrod

    that is just creepy. did u use it again. The lunch lady or who ever it was should be fired. What is the name of the school this happened at. Who did this happen to. Again, did u clean it and use it.

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  • WeeWillyWonka

    Looks too big to fit a Chinese pecker…

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