Chinese Netizens Post Silly Petitions on White House Website

white-house-petition-chinese-bean-curd-jelly-salty

In the wake of local media censorship over recent protests against the PX Project to construct a chemical plant in Kunming and the decade-old thallium-poisoning case involving Tsinghua student Zhu Ling [see chinaSMACK’s translated report here], many Chinese netizens turned to the White House’s We the People petitions website to voice their views.

However, Chinese netizens, true to form, soon began to petition over trivial and outlandish issues such as a “Petition to standardize bean curd jelly in the salty variety” and a“Petition to send troops to liberate Chinese people!” Unfortunately, these petitions only garnered a few hundred signatures, so we may never find out the Obama Administration’s official position regarding salty bean curd.

white-house-petition-chinese-liberation

Comments on Sina Weibo:

LachesisS:

If we are always like this, America will probably sooner or later start filtering the petitions. Can we please be more serious?

wu–hao:

I prefer the sweet kind…[bean curd jelly]

naro澄:

Anything placed in the hands of Chinese people will be ruined.

老冀de微博:

Reminds me of Google+ sweat

怪盗少女:

After seeing this, apart from laughing, I can only say that after this wouldn’t Zu Ling’s case become a joke, and the petition wasted…

CortexTsai:

I think We the People petitions should forbid non-American citizens or permanent residents from voting.

-黄德仁:

The White House Post Bar [discussion forum] is on the verge of becoming the most popular forum of the year.

贼弱贼弱的halo:

I truly believe society have a lot of bored stupid people, always ruining the order of things.

Help us maintain a vibrant and dynamic discussion section that is accessible and enjoyable to the majority of our readers. Please review our Comment Policy »
  • Alphy

    I don’t believe anyone can vote on these, so ya there are hundreds of American weirdos who wants to know what white house will say about bean curd.

    • radbab

      They’ll probably end up wondering what bean curd is, because tofu is actually one of the few chinese dishes which really doesn’t need any translation.

      • Ick

        Well, aside the whole thing where the pronunciation is actually derived from Japanese. Yes,

  • Mark

    Idiots.

  • BlackSugarDaddy

    Chinese people solemnly demand every American citizen should have a penis /boobs reduction surgery so as to prevent a torrent of Chinese outflow

  • Rick in China

    This type of thing only creates animosity towards China. Americans hear about Chinese people and will simply think: what the fuck is wrong with those childish fools, flooding our system with their nonsense..

    It makes Chinese look bad to the foreign public in a large way, even though it’s a very VERY small minority taking part.

    I’d recommend US starts allowing petitions only from US IP addresses.

    • Justin

      Yeah, you’re totally right guy. Flooding the online petition system with nonsense is reserved for us ‘mericans.
      https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/secure-resources-and-funding-and-begin-construction-death-star-2016/wlfKzFkN

      How dare these godless commie bastards sully the good name of our democracy with their inane jokes? For shame!

      • Justin

        Other than our petition to build the Death Star, the other petitions that gained the most signatures were a petition to deport Piers Morgan and another one to allow Texas to secede from the union, so I don’t see how your outrage is warranted. I think you just want to be angry about something the Chinese did and this is your cause d’jour.

        • Rick in China

          Of course there are silly petitions. But, it’s an American system, and as such, Americans deserve the right to voice any opinion they want in the infrastructure they’re *PAYING* for. Chinese people posting nonsense petitions in the US democratic systems for AMERICAN voices to be heard simply dilutes it more. It’s like someone who pays to go to a University asking a stupid question during a lecture. He paid for the class, he gets the right to ask a stupid question. This situation is basically a bunch of fuckers off the street running into the classroom disrupting the lecture others are paying for and asking stupid questions. They do NOT have that right. Get it?

          • Jack

            @Rick in China wow, your stupidity is epic!

          • Rick in China

            Great retort Jack! I’d say your argument is sound, but you don’t have one – and with that, prove only that you are either 1) a troll, 2) incapable of creating a sound response.

            I’m wagering both.

        • Azo

          “Chinese people posting nonsense petitions in the US democratic systems for AMERICAN voices to be heard”

          O

      • BiggJ

        Stupid americans….they already have a death star. It’s called a satellite that hold nukes.

        • donscarletti

          So, are you claiming that the US or China is currently in violation of the Outer Space Treaty of 1967?
          If something like that was found in orbit, I doubt much else would be discussed in the UN while it was still up there.

          • BiggJ

            Who says it’s around earths orbit? it could be around Hoth or Degobah or even Naboo.

            In all serious though how hard would it be to hide a nuke in a satellite? Im not saying anyone has them, but it’s not that far fetched.

            And it was a joke to begin with…

          • donscarletti

            You’re jokes are even more cryptic than the salty tofu joke.

            To me, what you suggested sounded like a very practical and deadly weapon, rather than far-fetched humourous hyperbole. This is why the world got together banned them almost 50 years ago.

            In answer to your question: depends on how many nukes and how you want them targeted.

            A Mk-21 re-entry vehicle, which was used by the Peacekeeper missile is a cone with base diameter of 22 inches (55 cm) and a length of 69 inches (175 cm) and weighs well over 300kg, including a 300kT W87 H-bomb. The Peacekeeper could lob 10 of them into and out of space, but comparitively not very high and not very fast.

            If you want to put the same bomb on a satilite in low earth orbit, it will be going much higher and much, much faster. This means a few things, each re-entry vehicle needs rockets for de-orbit, each re-entry vehicle needs a larger ablative shield and needs a far higher volume to weight ratio to slow down quicker in the atmosphere. I’m no rocket scientist, but looking at other orbital sample return vehicles from the Cold War, we’re looking at a roughly sphere shaped re-entry vehicle about 4×4 feet and a smaller de-orbit motor attached, all weighing close to a ton.

            This is assuming that you you know exactly where you want to drop your nukes when you launch it. If you require the ability to change the orbital plane of the satilite, you require a much larger service module, similar to the one on the back of the Apollo spacecraft, 4-5 tons of rocket may be enough to allow it to attack a different city in a country that it already orbits over.

            So I guess, if you made an extremely large fake satellite with fake or simple cover mission equipment that did nothing else but station keeping, listening for attack orders and hiding bombs, you could fit two or three pre-targeted bombs or one targetable bomb. It would be quite huge and would be easily trackable by radar though, so you’d need a good cover story about why you’ve got such a big satellite in space with functioning guidence but is seemingly not doing anything else to justify why you put it there. Maybe just have it babble random numbers when it goes over your tracking station to pretend to be a spy satellite or something.

          • Mighty

            Dumbscarletti, you are a funnier joke than the salty tofu. Posting ‘numbers’ may make you seem well informed but you are still clueless in what you are talking about.

            Case in point: The Peacekeeper was an ICBM, which meant the missile was to be launched above the lower atmosphere to travel towards its targets. Upon nearing the designations it will re-enter the atmosphere and the10 MIRV’s will then separate to each of its own pre-programmed target.

          • donscarletti

            “The Peacekeeper could lob 10 of them into and out of space, but comparitively not very high and not very fast.”

            I said what you said, but I said it first, I said it more succinctly and I said it in reference to how it differs from keeping a nuke in orbit.

            If you don’t like my numbers, give better ones.

          • Mighty

            You said “lob 10..” as opposed to being launched as one single unit until re-entry. You said it more succinctly by adding “Mk-21″, “22 inches (55 cm) and a length of 69 inches (175 cm) and weighs well over 300kg”, and “300kT W87 H-bomb”? All irrelevant. Just as your comments.

          • wahnwhaaa

            It’s not a death star unless it could be mistaken for a Moon to the untrained eye. Clearly.

          • BiggJ

            lol, yeah fair enough.

        • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

          That’s not a death star. The Death Star Project involves hollowing out the moon to store the proper materials to build a-oh dear I said too much.

        • trouse

          but don’t you know it will fall to china this year?

      • Mighty

        This is as bad as frivolous lawsuits flooding our judicial system.

      • Azo

        THe odds are that every voter has there ISP noted so any non-Amcerian ISP voter don’t count.

        Whats more funny I find is the tab for “history of petition” it says.

        “The right to petition your government is guaranteed by the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution.”

        Basically you can take it as, ok, Chinese people from China are allowed to right to petition there own government (CCP) on here and its in the US first amendment for you do so. So in other words its a US right that Chinese people can protest against the Chinese government.

    • andao

      It also makes the China gov look pretty bad, as they have nothing even remotely close. I like that part of it.

    • The Enlightened One

      That won’t matter, too much the people will just start using VPNs that reroute to US IP addresses. It would help no doubt, but wouldn’t entirely solve it

      • Rick in China

        The majority of people in China who use the net don’t use VPNs. Some do – especially foreign community or people who work in foreign companies, but the minority who uses US VPNs alone would eliminate much of this sort of spam.

        Of course it wouldn’t “solve” it, but as Deng Xiao Ping said, when you open the window surely some flies will come in. At least adding technical restrictions would add a fly-screen. Democracy is the fresh air requiring the window to be open btw. :D

        • Klove

          Indeed he did, although from what I head even vee pee en’s are not working so well these days, a mate of mine in guangdong got peeved he can’t access certain naughty sites, anyone know if it’s the same all over the MK?!

          • Rick in China

            Been using StrongVPN since 2008. Always been good.

          • Klove

            I think I had a free trial of it once, it worked well. An american guy I knew was cursing astrill a while back.

          • Rick in China

            StrongVPN is great. Not only the actual VPN, but the customer service..the only help window is awesome. I don’t want to sound like an advertisement, but I think I got in on some $55/yr thing, I always recommend it when people ask, and don’t care to pass my e-mail about for the “referral credit” :D

          • Klove

            Provided it works in Chengdu (I’m in mianyang as of now, if it works there too it’s a bonus) please pass your email along. I don’t like or trust banks I am afraid, so do they accept payment by alipay? Cheers

          • Rick in China

            My last reply didn’t show up it seems, of course it works in Chengdu (I’m in Chengdu). Go to reliablehosting website and click the customer service window in the bottom right – they’ll give you sites that work from China to sign up and information on payment processing..all will be good.

          • Klove

            No worries, thanks for the reply, I’m currently in Mianyang now if it works there I guess all of Sichuan province is no problem. Cheers for the heads up.

          • Roderick

            Just remember StrongVPN’s main domain is blocked in China. You need to go to StrongVPN (.org) to access their $55 package.

          • Klove

            Thanks for the notice!

          • Klove

            The price seems better than astrill, but unlike astrills site, I can’t access the scoundrel, strongvpn.org seems down here too!

          • BiggJ

            Try http://www.securitales.com….just do the free trial. You get between 10-30mins free and when that’s done just delete your browser history and you can do it again. It’s not bad, I just just use it for facebook.

          • Klove

            Thanks for that link, does it support linux though is the pisser?

          • Klove

            found it at reliable xtreme hosting but seems you need a card and to open a paypal account, astrill will let you use alipay, chinese friend with internet banking card to help me pay and give her the rmb?!

          • Roderick

            Dude, that was me. A**holes never did pay me.

        • James

          can’t they just use a proxy server?

          • Rick in China

            It’s also easy to block traffic that is going through proxy OR common VPN services, mind you. :D Of course there are ways around that, but again – the majority of people wont have any clue, and it’s unlikely the few who can/actually put in that much effort would be more than a speck in the scheme of things.

      • Echo_Seven

        As long as only a very small number of these petitions ever clears the “official response” threshold, so that we’re not wasting White House bandwidth answering questions from Chinese nationals, this should be okay. Right now it mainly generates good PR, and draws fire towards certain nations that don’t have this sort of system…

        The scary thing though is that it would not take very much from the Chinese netizen population to absolutely swamp the system, if they even slightly wanted to. Then they should probably look into IP address filtering.

    • Rainer

      Whenever it comes to the mockery of US democracy, you guys will all lose not only sense of humour but also the Chinese language ability you blow up daily.

      Haven’t you guys ever heard of “Toufu Eating”, though you hate to let Chinese know what great deed Lawinsky did in Oral Office?

      This “Petition to standardize bean curd jelly in the salty variety” will be remembered as most intelligent comedy gold ever posted on White House site, which no Americans can enjoy, hahaha!

      • BiggJ

        Did America deny you a visa or something? Is that why you hate them so much? Or did you have to settle for some shitty European country to live in? Keep trying…you can make it to america like all your other chinese friends.

        • donscarletti

          Poor guy, stuck with going to a European country. Or maybe Canada or Australia even.

          Imagine being a new immigrant saddled with the burden of free healthcare, high minimum wage, yearly leave and free vocational schools.

          • BiggJ

            Are you saying all European countries have free healthcare and so on? And for fuck sakes man it was joke!! Since america/canada is the end all be all for most chinese people.

          • James

            and greece, spain, portugal & Italy

            I like the way you use the term “free”, compare tax rates especially if you figure in VAT/sales

          • donscarletti

            For the tax bracket that new Chinese immigrants are most likely to be in, tax rates are slightly lower outside the US.

            For the cities Chinese immigrants are likely to go to, sales tax is quite high, SF has 8.5% iirc.

          • Mighty

            Stop throwing ‘numbers’ out there as though you really know what you’re talking about.

          • donscarletti

            I remember paying 8.5% sales tax when I was in San Francisco, where there are a lot of Chinese people. If I’m wrong about that rate, then feel free to correct me, but don’t blame me for having basic numeracy skills.

          • Mighty

            To your credit, you were correct. The 0.25% was raised as of April 1, 2013. (Note: The rate has at 8.5% since 2002, hitting the high of 9.5% from 2009-2011 and back to 8.5% in 2011-2013).

            S.F. is a fantastic city, compared to Los Angeles where certain cities are at 10%.

          • BiggJ

            Try 12% in Vancouver. Lots of chinamen flock there. In Nova scotia where I’m from the HST is 15% on every dollar you spend. It’s like the highest in canada.

          • James

            nova… well look at it this way, at least you’re not a goofy

          • James

            compare to many euro countries starting at 10% & many @ 25%

          • GatsbyC

            Yeah what a tool. I bet he likes to fling his own poop in the air and eat it like a goddamned filthy monkey. What a degenerate. I heard he wears diapers because of his problem. amiriteguys???

        • Rainer

          —America “denied me a visa”?
          Been there and seen it many times while you cannot imagine it. Thats why I enjoy the Toufu joke while you cannot.

          — “Is that whyI hate them so much”?

          Do you bunch of losers here hate China so much that you gather here bashing China daily because China denied you a visa, I mean a Z visa that can help you keep your dignity and escape from the living on foodstamps?
          But anyway I love this toufu joke like all smart Chinese while you’ve lost a lot in your colourless life “communist rule” under which you live willingly, lol!

          • James

            Been there and seen it many times while you cannot imagine it.

            he can’t imagine it? he’s a canuck, he lives right next door & barring any felony conviction or similar flag, could easily get in.

          • BiggJ

            Who says I live in a commie country? I live in Canada. 1000x time better the shit hole you’re from. That why you choose to live in another country other then china and still brainwashed enough to defend it. I like this site because china is the most fuck up place i’ve been with the most backwards people… and i’ve been to Mexico and Philippines….and china is more fucked then those countries. So it’s entertaining for me to read about the crazy shit you guys do.

            And how are you any better then the rest of the people who bash china? You go on a web site and post shit about america and food stamps all the time. You are no different then anyone else on here. It’s just you’re on defense instead of offense.

            And people get that shitty joke…it’s just not funny. It’s lame like every other chinese joke i’ve ever heard.

          • James

            maybe it’s a mainland/gong fei raised thing, quite a few Taiwanese i knew had decent senses of humor & I came across some funny comedy in Taipei

          • BiggJ

            Oh yeah, Taiwan’s is a way better place. I’m just talking mainlanders.

          • Rainer

            You are real honest to admit you still feel comfortable in Mexico and Philippines, since nobody there make you feel like a down-going power and a less superior being with a rotten system that you brag daily. I could well imagine your feeling if they would one day suddenly buy a Mercedez and begin to sit on same table for a cognac.
            Thats why I like China and why you all hate it.

          • BiggJ

            And what has america ever done to you?

          • Rick in China

            Phillipines is pretty f’d up too Big. Look at their political system :D It’s modeled after the US system, but guns are WAY more prolific. Malls have screenings and gun storage, and politicians basically go to guerrilla warfare during their campaigns…literally gunfights and assassinations are norm in order to win a seat. Kids with RPGs..yep, you can find that there.

            Sounds more like some regions of pakistan, but it’s a way of life in other countries too..

          • BiggJ

            shhhh.. I was being a dick head. lol But when it comes to fishing, swimming and nice weather. Hard to beat.

          • Rick in China

            Agreed – I was there in December, and it was awesome.. Mactan island, Shangri-La there has their own little protected reef, amazing snorkling off the beach in comparison to beach snorkling in most places. Not quite Galapagos, but close :D

          • Rick in China

            Shit, I didn’t even realize the tofu joke – it’s pretty golden, I agree! Glad you pointed that out.. surprised I didn’t think about it like that actually.

    • Irvin

      Agree, it’s not right but it’s true. How one present oneself to another enthnicity reflects on their entire enthnicity.

      People are shallow that way, it’s just how it is.

    • 白色纯棉小裤裤

      How about the petitions for Ameristralia and Death Star?

      Or when Americans express their nonsense its called humour, but when Chinese say the same thing its called nonsense and makes Chinese people look bad?

      I can tell that you are a 100% American because you have trully mastered the art of double standard.

      • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

        Because this is junk started by Americans(most of the time) but because it’s American it’s okay because it’s an American website meant specifically for Americans.

        The second problem was that it was not intended for humor. Americans who come in with their nonsense are laughed off because it’s just some idiot being an idiot. Because he’s an American, he has the right to be an idiot so he can go on ahead and do stupid stuff.

        When say Chinese come over and put their stuff in it, funny or not, it is taken as a representation of the entire culture of people who posted it. At that point it enters ‘Politically Correct’ territory and Americans are very uncomfortable entering that territory.

        • 白色纯棉小裤裤

          Contradicts to what you are saying, the idiots are not being laughed off but they are treated seriously. The Death Star one got 100,000 signatures and the White House officially responded to the Petition. So what you are saying about the site not intended for humour is totally BS.
          Did the American government say that the internet should be open and accused China of the GFW. Its funny though when some websites are unblocked and Chinese acturally come and post their stuff Americans get upsetted right away.

          • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

            No they are not intended to be serious. A petition for something silly can still receive signatures as a way of saying ‘funny joke’ despite how stupid it sounds. It’s alright because that’s an American who did it.

            When a foreigner does it, things get uncomfortable. Like if China ever has an equivalent and it becomes flooded with ‘AMERICAN FUCK YEAH!’

          • 白色纯棉小裤裤

            No the White House officially responded to the “stupid joke” which indicates posting jokes is definitely a function of the website.
            If we Chinese post jokes on a Chinese website we definitely would not mind foreigners doing the same thing on the website.

          • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

            See, RIGHT THERE you said it. “White House officially responded”.

            That is a government website, hence the ‘.gov’ part of the URL. The American government and its bureaucracy does from time to time respond to jokes with jokes of their own. The CDC released a pamphlet for surviving a zombie apocalypse for crying out loud. But the thing is, the things the government responds to are in-jokes. Jokes that are part of American pop culture. Star Wars is part of American cinematic history, hence all the references to the Death Star and people playing the Imperial March when talking about their political opponents. It’s funny because Americans remember where it came from.

            Now imagine if the Chinese government wanted to reform itself, and by some miracle, decided to let the people speak on a website on how to improve conditions in the county. Along comes a few Americans and floods this site with “AMERICA FUCK YEAR! JOIN MURRICA! MAKE CHINA THE 51ST STATE LOL!” that wouldn’t sit well in a Chinese government website would it?

          • 白色纯棉小裤裤

            Your example is retarded. The petitions Chinese posted are not rude, instead they even make fun of themselves, such as “Send troops to liberate China”. If a few Americans come to the Chinese website and say “Send troops to liberate America” then they will definitely be welcomed.

          • Mighty

            “FUCK YEAH!!!” That’s right!

          • donscarletti

            Welcome to the Internet, it’s global.

            If you don’t like it, stop coming to this Chinese forum and making jokes about Chinese politics and society.

          • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

            wat.

            I’m not. I’m explaining why some people(regardless of national affiliation) would be offended by Chinese making a joke out of a foreign website not intended for jokes.

          • BiggJ

            It’s like when those white guys were pissing on the street….Chinese got right upset about that…but its cool for chinese to do it. That was even on chinese news. Same kind of deal.

          • 白色纯棉小裤裤

            Can you present a single piece of evidence of Chinese netizens saying its cool for Chinese adults to piss on the street or any where in the public?

          • BiggJ

            Yeah but will they make a big deal about it when a chinese person does it? Will it be talked about on the news and on websites? no. But foreigners do it….it’s a national problem.

          • cheong

            Frankly, it not cool or cool about it.

            It is no big deal, all guys do it.

            I have done it and will do again, so what so big deal about it.

            When driving, when you bladder is full after a drink or two or more, what you going do?? eh??

            Try the Bangkok traffic jam !!!

            ============
            But foreigners do it….it’s a national problem.

            =============

            Actually, it was not a national problem, it was NEWS and news sell newspaper, LOL.

            I mean, how often you see a group of foreigners lining along the highway and peeing. ???

            NO big deal, it could have been you and or me, LOL.

            Have a nice day

          • James

            dui, tsk tsk

          • James

            well since a great deal seem to do it……

          • Mighty

            The site for petition serves one of Americans’ most treasured rights. The Freedom of Speech. With it Americans’ concerns or wishes can be heard, silly or not. It’s their basic rights and principle.

            About non-Americans fucking around with it is like this: Imagine a house built for and occupied by Americans. They use the windows to write notes to each other. One day some dude comes over and writes some shits in Chinese that only Chinese can understand (or appreciate) its nature based on culture.

          • donscarletti

            The First Amendment does not grant you a forum. It in itself does not grant you the right to be heard, by government or by anyone else.

            This forum is a really great initiative of the Obama administration for bringing greater democracy to America. Chinese turning it into a joke I can forgive since the initiative gives them nothing, but Americans themselves reducing it into absurdity through disingenuous petitions are just hurting themselves and their countrymen.

          • Mighty

            Nobody was talking about the First Amendment, or the Bill of Rights, for that matter. I simply said Americans have the freedom of speech to be heard. Using the petition is just one of the tools.

            Btw, I’m sure websites were not invented when the First Amendment was written. So in a way, you’re right, forums via the internet were not granted.

          • donscarletti

            If it’s not a law, it’s not a right. You can write to your congressman and he is free to throw your letter in the bin without reading it, just as you are free to do the same when someone writes to you.

          • James

            I don’t believe Mighty said the representative couldn’t toss it away.

            I think many do

          • Mighty

            No I wasn’t but Don Einstein couldn’t comprehend that.

          • Mighty

            “If it’s not a law, its not a right”. You are making me laugh now. It’s that what you learned in school? You must be a starving lawyer.

          • James

            wait you’re chinese you need to write “stuffs”

        • Daniel

          Only racists take it as a representation of the entire culture of people who posted it.

          • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

            And yet, it happens…

      • ZlsetrdX

        If Americans post whatever shit they want on We The People, it’s their right. It’s an AMERICAN website of the AMERICAN government, paid by AMERICAN taxes and meant for AMERICAN people. “We the people” in the Constitution DOES NOT INCLUDE the Chinese people, so if they post they do it only at the American gov’s mercy and kindness. It’s like this: your children can spill soup on your carpet but if the neighbor’s children do it you just kick their butts off to their parents’ homes. If I go over this all again I’ll feel so stupid I’ll go request a Chinese citizenship.

        PS: I’m not American

    • http://simplydesigned.tumblr.com/ maybeabanana

      Probably and it makes sense that this deals its domestic problems first. But this probably won’t stop anons who can mask their ips.

    • http://www.facebook.com/noah.altman Noah Altman

      “I’d recommend US starts allowing petitions only from US IP addresses.”

      Then expats shouldn’t be taxed. :)

    • jjongdouche

      Damn, China’s internet must seriously suck if this is what people do for kicks. Must be bored shitless. And here we are, reading about it!

    • Harry

      LOL…Ironic because you people go to China, yet frequent American blog trashing Chinese, or frequent blogs about how Chinese sucks. Look in the mirror

  • ScottLoar

    The pressing story now is raising Zhu Ling’s case (朱令案) and attempted murder by Thallium 19 years ago, not this silly stuff.

  • megantron

    No worries about having the site filter petitions. Americans post the dumbest petitions themselves on that site. I signed a petition to get rid of the petitions because I was tired of seeing crap like “Get America to build a deathstar by 2020″. (OK, so that one is actually pretty funny. But they’re all trivial stuff like that.)

    I mean, I understand the Obama administration wants to get people involved, but the site has basically become a space for people to air their mostly petty complaints and for trolls to get attention.

    • Sean Cauffiel

      The Death Star petition actually got enough signatures and received an official response from the State Department. Google it. They write it somewhat seriously.

      • mr.wiener

        Tongue firmly in cheek. They knew a good opportunity for hipster PR when they saw it.

        • megantron

          Pretty much, yeah.

    • http://simplydesigned.tumblr.com/ maybeabanana

      Trolling comes with the territory. Denying that is still silencing a voice. The principle of being heard is good. I think the govnt wants to see this abuse of privilege happen such that they can have a reason to topple any farther future petition abilities. Some people are too selfish and ignorant to realize what they are doing.

  • The Enlightened One

    LOL… the Chinese government is going to track these people down and “liberate” them from physical existence.

  • linette lee

    Send troops to liberate chinese people….

    XD. lol….. They are watching too much hollywood films.

  • linette lee

    I think the white house discussion forum is a nice place.

    china should have a ccp discussion forum for the chinese people too.

    • http://sinopathic.com/ terroir

      They do. That’s what this is for.

    • BiggJ

      Yeah right, go ask all people in prison who complained too much to the government.

    • Ron King

      We petition the Xi Jingping administration to: Go to that freaking tea house on Nanjing road and get my 400 quai back! I was assured it was only 48! Bastards!

  • ophiolater

    It’s quite funny!

  • BiggJ

    Careful what you wise for. lol

  • Alphy
    • Mighty

      Good one! I signed it.

    • James

      congrats it’s up to 2

      • Mighty

        Hahaha… and I’m proud to be 50%.

  • y.m.

    How sad, even the chinese people have to depend on the u.s. for their rights. I thought they had more pride than that. China will never surpass america like this. Even if they did, it wouldnt last long until their true “patriotic” citizens start a uprising just like in the early 20th century.

    • Rainer

      As Americans owe so much debt from China and US is the sole revolution exporter, they have every duty and obligations to liberate, by Rambo or not, the Chinese who live on foodstamps and to overthrow WMD-armed Chinese government which waterboard its citizens and, well, to bomb every corner of China as they did daily to other countries. Who said only Iraqi could have that enviable privilege alone and solely enjoy that kinda freedom? Damn!

      • Ron King

        I still say China owes us plenty from the bonds debacle.

        • James

          china owes us roughly half of what we owe them. Mao unilaterally cancelled china’s debt to the US & we can do the same if need be or at least deduct what those welching fucks wouldn’t repay

      • Boris

        How can anyone up-vote this? I couldn’t get to the end of the paragraph without my head falling off!

      • James

        yeah but if we bomb china back to the mao age where we gonna get shoddy quality electronics & cheap products that fall apart after 3 months?

        wmd? you can make one w a pressure cooker like some joker from durkastan

        • Rick in China

          ‘Nam

          • James

            I know it’s an ooption but they haven’t got quite the infrastructure as china last i knew

        • Rainer

          Thats why I can assure you US doesn dare to “bomb china back to the mao age”, with borrowed money or not, since 99% Americans cannot live a single day without “shoddy quality electronics & cheap products” & cheap pants to cover the monkey ass.

          • James

            you’re a fool, most clothes come from other monkeys than chinese

    • Chinese

      Are you serious? These petitions weren’t meant to be serious.

  • BiggJ

    I just went to web site to check it out…lol…some of them are funny. haha..here are a few of them..

    Allow Americans to vote “Yes” or “No” on WHITE GENOCIDE!

    Join America and Australia to form Ameristralia

    Legally recognize Westboro Baptist Church as a hate group…this one had 350,000 votes lol

    Send troops to liberate Hong Kong

    And this was a new one that was just posted:

    Of pengzhou, sichuan province, 10 million tons/year crude distillation and 800000 tons/year ethylene production project.

    Is located in pengzhou, sichuan province, sichuan petrochemical
    base, including 10 million tons/year crude distillation and 800000
    tons/year ethylene and 25 sets of production equipment. To chengdu
    surrounding environment have a big impact, in 2008 and 2013, two big
    earthquake happened in sichuan province. So, for environmental risk
    above is so big, need to reassess safety, implored the international
    environment monitoring and evaluation institutions to help support!
    Thank!

    • Rainer

      Pity no expats is smart enough to enjoy the Toufu joke, you are no exception, lol!

      • BiggJ

        Sorry chinese jokes are not funny to rest of the world,

        • mr.wiener

          What lies yellow, stiffened, covered in DNA under your bed and women scream when they see it?
          A sock.

          • BiggJ

            What’s yellow, wishes it was white but hates everything white?

            Rainer.

          • Rainer

            What’s white? The ones who know the super time was long over and stil hate to swollow the fat that 43% of young adults believe their prospects would be better had they been born in China! You know what they “wish”, at least for a visa, lol!

            http://www.mirror.co.uk/money/personal-finance/future-britain-poll-reveals-fears-1860635

          • BiggJ

            Dude, you read the part of the story incorrectly.

            “Do you think your opportunities are better or worse than each of the following….someone born in….”

            That means 43% think they are better off then someone born in china…and 27% worse…I don’t know where the other 30% went….look the bright side…at least you beat out India.

          • BiggJ

            I can post some bullshit stats too.

            http://www.theglobalist.com/StoryId.aspx?StoryId=8832

            “if U.S. immigration policies allowed it, 97% of the Chinese people would probably want to move to the United States.”

        • Boris

          Have you ever been in a Chinese shopping mall when someone just stops at the bottom, or top, of an escalator -to make a phone call or chat to a friend or light a cigarette or give birth etc etc -causing a massive pile-up of people behind them? THAT’s Chinese comedy.

          • Joe Nebbish

            Too true! Saw an 8 person stacked on the ground pile-up at the end of a moving walkway last time I was at HKG. All Chinese, of course. LOL!

        • Rainer

          Though I’ve got load of jokes about you rednecks, I have no interest to entertain a dumb-head whose only ability is to reason out other’s nationality according to what he speak for.

          And still I feel the Chinese Toufu jokes is great, a comedy gold for “rest of the world” that prefer to side with Lewinsky rather than with your beloved Kommissar Hillary, lol!

        • linette lee

          I will tell you a chinese joke.

          A beautiful chinese girl was walking down the street with her really ugly chinese boyfriend. People ask the ugly dude. “Why a pretty girl like her date an ugly dude like you? She has bad taste.” The ugly boyfriend replies to defend himself and his girl. “She is very intelligent and she has good taste. She’s even a big fan of picasso painting.”

          http://www.instablogsimages.com/images/2008/01/11/picasso-paintings_1333.jpg

      • James

        so funny I’m wondering why it never made it with the rest of the kneeslappers to the cS page on jokes.

        Reminds me of my old tw gf telling me the japanese found the date 9/9/99 hilarious

        • mr.wiener

          I like it when they give a foreigner a phone number like 78787878, or 38383838.
          Actually you can usually tell when a foreigner is ringing you because the number ends in 4.

          • James

            same number? how coincidental is that? it’s the same tel #’s i got off those model chicks from la.

            you think theye’re roommates?

          • mr.wiener

            Only if they like numbers that sound like “dick” , “ditsy” or “death”.

    • linette lee

      ………..Send troops to liberate Hong Kong……..

      I don’t understand this part. They want usa to send troops to liberate HK from hk gov’t or china gov’t?

      Why usa always assume the responsibility of providing military to other countries to liberate this and liberate that. USA needs to mind their own business and economy. lol.

      • James

        no! go tell the state dep’t you’re a rep for some hk democracy group. If some crazy ROC pro family backs you yopu’ll be on your way

        look, an old pro iranian group that bombed us , is now in charge in iraq

        hk is under threat from china by the martial law of having a bunch of PLA/AF paratroopers in the PoW barracks,

    • mr.wiener

      Australamerica thank you very much.

      • BiggJ

        I know if chinese keep coming to canada they will have to rename it “chinanada”. lol

  • http://sinopathic.com/ terroir

    Are you an English teacher in China? Have you ever tried to get your students to talk freely? Have you noticed that your students go nuts when using the freedom of expression?

    That’s what this is: Chinese taking advantage of something without responsibility. As Westerners (should) know, freedom of expression is about being responsible. This is finding a resource that stands for something (freedom) and then exploiting it. Sure, it may give them the “sense” of freedom for exercising they can’t do back home, but as others have said, this just makes Chinese look bad for doing what they do best.

    Like, say, Wolverine at a pinata-hitting contest. To raise funds for battered pinatas.

    • James

      are you talking about kids? it’s not a great gauge of responsibility

      • http://sinopathic.com/ terroir

        Chinese require about 10 years of English study before they even begin to speak English, so I’m talking university level.

        As if they’re kids or not, it’s your call.

        • James

          given the chinese ‘norms’ I encountered in TW, I’d say yes but it wasn’t what I meant, so I’ll defer to your knowledge

    • jeffli

      “Have you ever tried to get your students to talk freely?”
      Well I seen them “talk freely” about the senkaku islands, criticize US every which way, throw rocks at Toyota and Honda cars!.
      I would say they need to “suck it in ” and get on with really developing their society.

  • http://www.chinasmack.com/ MrT

    yea leave America alone, the cheek posting on the govs web site. They lock people up in America for posting bad things on the tinternet,

    They got enough problems to deal with anyway , like the Independence Day “an act of civil disobedience.” march coming up!

    • http://www.chinasmack.com/ MrT

      This is an act of civil disobedience, not a permitted event. We will
      march with rifles loaded & slung across our backs to put the
      government on notice that we will not be intimidated & cower in
      submission to tyranny. We are marching to mark the high water mark of
      government & to turn the tide. This will be a non-violent event,
      unless the government chooses to make it violent. Should we meet
      physical resistance, we will peacefully turn back, having shown that
      free people are not welcome in Washington, & returning with the
      resolve that the politicians, bureaucrats, & enforcers of the
      federal government will not be welcome in the land of the free.

      Hahahaha on the floor, they overdosed on their own bulshit for to many years…

  • Rainer

    hahaha!

  • Ron King

    It’s kinda funny. If it was an American in China the American people would start a petition with the American government. When it’s a Chinese in America, the Chinese start a petition with the American government. It’s probably all KFC or Apple’s fault.

  • RobRoy’sProgeny

    It will be interesting to see if the Chinese gov’t ever creates a similar page. They have shown a willingness to engage on social media and these forums can be easily manipulated if there are petitions they don’t like.

  • Mighty

    Based on the posted results, Chinese people prefer liberation over salty tofu, 3 to 1.

    • James

      chinese liberation theology? they’ve already been liberated they just need some liberty

      • Mighty

        Ah..haha…. sad irony!

  • http://www.facebook.com/starhunter007 Liu Qiwei

    i totally agree with you, my fellow americans, if you feel chineses spaming on your petition territory, then please do block all ip from china. it is simple, isn’t it? i can fully understand how busy and tiring you can be, when you try to be a world police, really a busy body.

    • James

      hey liu, who’s on first?

  • Dave

    http://kotaku.com/chinese-tv-uses-jon-stewart-to-criticize-the-u-s-miss-495681087

    Chinese TV Uses Jon Stewart to Criticize the U.S., Misses the Point

  • jeffli

    Pathetic!

    so whinging to another country anonymously instead of petitioning their own govt.

    whine whine whine!

    when will Chinese citizens be responsible for their own society?

    On the one hand they criticise Japan, US, etc. on the other hand they can wait to immigrate or receive handouts and take the money.

    And no-ones embarrassed by this kind of behaviour?

  • Alec. Baldwin

    Shit like this makes me want to spray paint smart assed graffiti on the walls of Gugong.

  • BrandeX
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