Kim Jong-un Secret Order Not to Fire First Shot, Chinese Reactions

North Korean Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un inspecting the front lines with military personnel.

On NetEase:

South Korean Media Claims Kin Jong-un Gave Secret Command that Front-Line Troops Shall Not Fire the First Shot

International Online Special: According to an April 1st report by South Korea’s JoongAng Daily, North Korea announced on March 30th that the two countries have entered a “state of war“, causing the already tense situation on the peninsula to become even more uncertain. However, some South Korean media claimed that North Korean Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un had previously issued a secret order to North Korean front-line forces that front-line soldiers absolutely must not fire the first shot and give South Korea and the United States the excuse to carry out a “retaliatory strike”.

According to leaks by multiple South Korean intelligence personnel on March 31st, although Kim Jong-eun made many high-profile inspections of the armed forces, he internally issued secret commands, ordering North Korean front-line military to maintain high alert and at the same time ensure that they do not fire the first shot. Kim Jong-un emphasized that they not create any opportunity for a “retaliatory strike” by South Korea and America.

Comments on NetEase:

芙小小仙子 [网易四川省网友]:

As expected, useless/pathetic. As I predicted, Fatty Kim III is doing it for his own ordinary common people to see, but in front of Imperialist America, totalitarianism is all dregs.

mwialiuyu [网易浙江省台州市手机网友]: (responding to above)

First floor [above commenter] is a stupid cunt! They at least know how to put on appearances for their people to see. Look at our government, too lazy to even put on appearances. And you still have the gall to talk about others?

网易吉林省长春市网友: (responding to above)

I think you’re the one who is a stupid cunt. Actually praising North Korea, talk about knowing nothing.

网易黑龙江省牡丹江市网友: (responding to above)

How come I don’t see where he’s praising North Korea?

空调太冷 [网易广东省深圳市网友]: (also responding to 芙小小仙子)

Anti-Japanese marches, Foreign Ministry protesting Japan… the same thing.

飘忽神游 [网易北京市手机网友]:

Was still boasting these past few days, but just one American and South Korean military exercise and he’s scared now.

bullet1228 [网易福建省手机网友]:

Fatty Kim III, you aren’t supposed to eat your own shit! After boasting so much, he now pretends to be weak?

超过百字一律不看 [网易四川省甘孜州康定县手机网友]:

Knew long ago that Fatty Kim III is just a paper tiger. The use of threats has gone on for decades, nothing more than asking for more capitalist aid.

97574971 [网易浙江省金华市网友]: (responding to above)

Screaming every day, about how a certain system is better than capitalism, so why keep asking capitalists to come provide aid? It’s been about deceiving the ordinary common people. Today’s world only has dictatorships and democracy, there are no -isms.

发条Solo [网易北京市手机网友]: 2013-04-01 10:48:00 发表

[He's] scared.

兕啵児 [网易重庆市武隆县网友]:

Damn fatty, release Ri Sol-ju, let me go first.

屠龙术 [网易吉林省长春市网友]:

A bluff, a clown.

屠龙术 [网易吉林省长春市网友]:

Bares fangs and brandishes claws on the outside, but actually weak inside.

都市骑驴 [网易江苏省手机网友]:

Fatty Kim III lives up to having studied abroad, still knowing who he is.
Everything he’s doing now, all of the posturing, it’s all for shifting the attention away from internal problems, a trick often used by rulers.

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  • vincent

    The circle jerk continues…

  • Ruaraidh

    If I was the ruler of North Korea, I’d be too fucking embarrassed. Fatty Kim must have a big fat pair of balls to be able to to what he does with a straight face.

    • meo fio

      Kim jung Un’s a pretty cool guy, eh threaten US, SK with war, playing basketball with NBA stars and doesn’t afraid of anything.

      • Hongwu Emperor

        Indeed.

        And the no-fear attitude is surely what the despicable modern world is lacking!!

    • Rick in China

      Are you serious? Why? The only people that he needs to believe and obey him are his own people, and they can’t access outside media/influence in any significant way…. so this bullshit posturing isn’t for YOU, it’s for them. Fatty Kim has absolutely no need for internet commentator Ruaraidh to give him praise, as you don’t mean shit to his ruling party.

      This bird can’t see the world outside of his nest I suppose.

      • Ruaraidh

        Bullshit is still bullshit, be it from Kim Jong-Un or Rick in China. Whether it works for the target audience or not is largely irrelevant to the stench.

        • Rick in China

          But is entirely relevant as to it’s utilization for a specific purpose, as is here.

          Like I said, you’re just a little bird and can’t see outside your own nest – a child commenting on political posturing as if he understands anything at all about it’s reasoning, yet showing his own ass to the world as someone who has not yet garnered a clue about why dictators may behave the way they do, even though it’s so completely obvious and historically repeated for centuries. Such a simpleton *sigh*.

          • Alain

            Some birds need to leave the nest and experience lifes vicissitudes shall we say, a certain older poster from canada certainly did!

          • Ruaraidh

            I feel I must apologise that my comment offended you. Naturally the people of unoccupied Korea follow Kim Jong-Un because of his masterful propaganda, not all his guns and prison camps.

            Criticising the Great Successor, who is beyond reproach from one such as me, has revealed me to be a barbarian and agent of the anti-Juche foreign powers.

            Honesty and plausibility as concepts distinct from utility is an imperialist lie. I shall Meditate on your teaching until the day that I’m experienced enough that, like you, I cannot separate the concepts of utility and disingenuousness.

          • Rick in China

            Again you miss the point. It’s not whether YOU and I can distinct propaganda bullshit from reality, it’s whether those under his control can – and they’re kept so in the dark (literally and figuratively) that, I think it’s safe to say, most of them can’t. Those that do are isolated, tortured, used in labour camps..

            You’re so focused on whether you or I can determine whether fatty Kim is full of shit or not, the whole concept and purpose of propaganda in a poverty stricken dictatorship goes over your head. Sink back into your nest little birdie, it’s warm in there.

          • Ruaraidh

            Actually I think it’s you who’s missing the point. I made a facetious post about Kim Jong-Un’s bullshitting antics, and you jump down my fucking throat about how I don’t understand the purpose of all that bullshit. Can’t you see the non sequitur there? I made no claims about the efficacy of his propaganda, only the ridiculousness of it.

          • mr.wiener

            Chinasmack is full of leaping laryngologists.

      • BiggJ

        Thats exactly right.

  • billy

    He reminds me of an Oriental Peter Kay – what is the Korean for ‘ave it!? The fat cunt has something to prove to the old guard around him so he is going to try and push the envelope on the sinking of the Cheonan. It is going to blow in his face when his silly juche country is turned to glass. Seoul will be destroyed but we will be rid of the biggest pain in the arse on the whole planet.

    • Bolo

      I had no idea Dashan did stand up there as well.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Harold-Janson/100000792053950 Harold Janson

      Actually, you might want to bother thinking for yourself rather than relying on state-propaganda about the Cheonan. The torpedo fragment they linked to it uses South Korean military markings and uses a pigment patented and manufactured in the South. NK had nothing to do with it. I’m so sorry that you’re such a useless sack of fat and shit that you are unable to understand anything that’s not spoon fed to you by governments that desire nothing but war and murder.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Harold-Janson/100000792053950 Harold Janson

        It’s actually more than just that once you bother to dig into the details.

        1) The Cheonan’s prop was tangled with fishing nets, which caused a failure in control.

        2) The area is full of old naval mines from the 70s which SK put there and never removed

        3) The torpedo is of German origin, something that SK has and NK doesn’t

        4) NK marks torpedos with 호 not 번

        5) The marking on the torpedo discovered was rather fresh, marked OVER rust. A genuine marking would have been on a smooth surface

        6) The marking was made with Blue Solvent 5, patented in SK by Monami

        7) The claim of mixed fragments from the ship and torpedo proving the link was debunked by everyone who bothered to actually analyse it. The backup claim is essentially “magic” happened.

        So, here’s what we’re left with, for a legitimate series of events: The Cheonan got tangled up in a fishing net, veered off course and hit one of their own mines. Desperate to not call attention to their idiocy, they scoured the area for something useful and found an old spent torpedo. They marked it up in a way that they thought NK torpedos are marked and with the eager support of the US propaganda machine placed the blame on the DPRK. No one likes to hear about mines, they have been demonized in the past decade or two and might start discussions about demining the harbor, as well as making the DPRK look as if they have been wronged. Best to spin the bullshit and do anything but admit the truth.

        And of course, the truth doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is a quick response along with shock and awe of bullshit. If the truth comes out later, without the aid of mass media (fat chance, they are in on it too), it will be unheard, and those who know it will be marginalized, doomed to spend all of their time repeating over and over again what actually happened to an audience that doesn’t want to admit that their governments and propaganda mouthpieces might possibly lie to them.

      • hess

        “The torpedo fragment they linked to it uses South Korean military markings and uses a pigment patented and manufactured in the South.” Says who? Also, where do you buy one of those tin foil hats you’re wearing?

        • http://www.facebook.com/people/Harold-Janson/100000792053950 Harold Janson

          Go read up on the official reports as well as the after-reports by those with access to the actual materials. The initial story relies on an “investigation” that from the get go made the assumptions that it was a NK torpedo. When actual evidence is examined it’s not that at all. The explosive signature doesn’t even match that of a torpedo, while it precisely matches that of a naval rising mine, which are scattered all over there. The report relies on the ship being in 47m of water, while all evidence including reports from the people on said ship put it in 25m of water, right where the mines are. The only reason for the 47m claim is because that’s where the german torpedo was found. Therefore, it’s bullshit.

          • hess
          • http://www.facebook.com/people/Harold-Janson/100000792053950 Harold Janson

            Yes, that’s called propaganda and I address all that below… Good job paying attention though.

          • hess

            Your opinion = fact.

            An investigation by 25 experts from ten domestic professional institutes, 22 military experts, three lawmakers from related National Assembly committees and 24 foreign experts from the U.S., Australia, the U.K. and Sweden = propaganda.

            But please do present all the evidence you talk about

      • Billy

        A conspiracy theorist eh – bore off! One day, one of you wankers will come out with something original.

    • Brett

      ” Seoul will be destroyed but we will be rid of the biggest pain in the arse on the whole planet.”

      Oh yeah, great fucking compromise jackass.

      • http://twitter.com/fafweafewafewaf fgewafwaeffegawef ga

        very true..

      • mr.wiener

        It is a great sacrifice, but one that billy is willing to make.
        Good grief.

        • Brett

          The weirdos are coming out again. How’s Sinopathic been, I haven’t ventured over there this week.

          • mr.wiener

            It’s like a gentleman’s club with expensive carpets, good port and cigars, comfy chairs and an excellent reading selection…….as well as a large doorman to keep the riff-raff out.

          • Beelzebub

            riff-raff, very english term, for the lower class. I suggest you watch fawlty towers, jolly good rip roaring laughter my dear boy, if you like terms like riff raff, guffaw guffaw!

          • mr.wiener

            Actually I just like taking the piss out of people living at the rotting hub of empire who think they’re better than lowerly colonials because of a geographic accident of birth.
            “What? life imprisonment in a country with hot summers surrounded by beaches and women without victorian inhibitions?….. I’m Jack the Ripper!”
            “…No you’re not! I’m Jack the Ripper!”

            Tiddle pip old thing.

          • Beelzebub

            Now now, I made clear I was an aussiephile, did I not. Rotting hub of empire, you too have all manner of immigrants and problems too, blue skies and sunshine dont make those go away. Most aussies I know are in China or elsewhere in Asia, so it can’t be all that great. From what most have told me it is coastal cities with a baking interior, nice if your rich enough to live on the coast, otherwise it sucks (seppo english), perhaps my great ancestors and your countries founders had the best idea leave the desert to the natives, let those with means settle on the coast and enjoy the beach and breeze, guffaw guffaw. I never once stated I felt I was better than anyone else…the chinese get a lot right, where we go wrong. All banter/beer talk, but if it gets your blood boiling, will keep you you young….

          • billy

            Says the long term hagwon chimp.

          • Brett

            What makes you think I work at a hakwon? Oh, I’m white and live in Korea… Great guess dipshit.

          • billybo72

            Course you work at a hagwon. You can see all your anger issues surfacing as your only chance of a reasonable lifestyle going up in smoke via the NK artillery.

          • Brett

            You should put “hill” in front of your moniker. It’d suit you.

          • billy

            All you Filipinos would jump at the chance to become a ‘hillbilly’ in the greatest country in the world y’all.

        • billy

          I didn’t get myself into said position. It is going to happen anyway, if you think that Kim and the juche leadership are ‘going to come to their senses’ then there is a bridge I want to sell you.

          • mr.wiener

            I think Kim is just doing business as usual after every time the S Koreans elect a new president.
            If I am proved right you have no soul. If you are correct I have no Seoul. If there are any people left alive they will be the Sole survivors.
            About this bridge, does it have a sea view?

          • billy

            I don’t think so, his country is on it’s last legs, it is what 50 years of sanctions does to a place, and now the Chinese have cut off ties then it is shit or bust, that is why the rhetoric is more threatening that even before – it is time for both sides to ‘to put up or shut up’ If you don’t like how that is worded then I don’t give a shit – it doesn’t mean it’s not true.

          • mr.wiener

            No one ever got rich off predicting the whims and wiles of the NK govt. If you are right I give you a nicely worded apology and buy your bridge. If you are not …I’ll leave to your discretion.

          • billy

            You will always be an ar-seoul whereas I will be the seoul voice of reason!

          • mr.wiener

            Do tell ,oh voice of reason, how does running into a new war in NK fit into the long term view you espouse?

      • billy

        Rough comprimise? It is going to happen, have fatty threatening you every 5 minutes and sinking your navy or Seoul has to pay a price. There is no way around it. I know you will be upset at your hagwon getting flattened and an easy life of playing ‘bomb game’ with adolescents all but over but at least you can go back to america and work at Burger King. Seoulites really have no choice.

        • Brett

          Yea, or before my hydroponic city farming business gets destroyed. Not to mention the home I purchased outright along with my family and friends.

          • billy

            Well, you are a bigger moron that I previously thought, what made you buy a farming business near one of the most volatile military borders on the planet? Really, a hagwon monkey has more sense, but before you spout off more bile, this situation has been engineered over the past 50 years so that when the juche regime gets removed. Seoul goes with it – no use crying over the internet to me about it. It aint going to help. Getting rid of the next to last anarchism from the cold war means Seoul is going wherever you like it or not.

          • Brett

            Regardless of what you may believe, you are just an identityless bullshit artist trying to get a rise out of people on the Internet. Cool.

          • billy

            That you would let someone that you don’t know and will never meet get you annoyed online shows what a bigger idiot you are than I thought previously. You really do sound like a mong with anger issues, ranting and raving away at what is basically the truth, go and have a lie down.

          • Brett

            Yes, hill Billy works much better. There is a distinct difference between saying “you tried to make me angry” and “you made me angry”.

            Also, don’t flatter yourself, no one can make me angry other than myself. The only thing you make me is great fun my parents aren’t from West Virginia.

          • billy

            That is why you are effing and jeffing and climbing out of your pram like a retard – 1-0 for me against Farmer Giles!

          • Brett

            cc that’s you isn’t it? Different moniker and no meat curtains, but it’s you all right. You aren’t good at pretending like you are from America.

          • billy

            Now you have gone from talking bile to gibberish – no idea who or what ‘cc’ is? Who is pretending to be from America, Mr Filipino?

          • mr.wiener

            I believe the original objection was to the smug way in which you’d write off a city you probably don’t live in as the price of ridding us of Kim the third [or as the irish would have it "Kim the turd"]
            All you rejoining posts on the matter have made you look more like the smug twit that you are.

          • billy

            I have lived there but the last 50 years has got to the stage where it is under serious threat. Whichever way I put won’t change any of the facts. I might be smug but you are a pointless bore with no life, the number of posts you have made on here must run into the tens of thousands.

          • Ruaraidh

            No doubt if you’d posted as many comments as mr.wiener you wouldn’t have had time to win your Nobel Prize, let alone all your Olympic medals.

          • billy

            That’s right paddy! We can’t all be a hagwon monkey. Never mind – better luck in the next life!

          • mr.wiener

            Bore? guilty as charged. Over opinionated dipshite? I’ll have to work harder to get to your level Obiwan.

          • billy

            I see you forgot ‘pointless’ you are both pointless and a bore. Geddit? It is all about levels sonny, one day you might leave the hagwon with your farming pal Brett and become useful.

          • mr.wiener

            Remember what they say about people who assume?
            I live in Taiwan.
            What about you?

          • linette lee

            may the force be with you.

          • Beelzebub

            Live long and prosper!

          • billy

            Oh yes – I have got bridge that I want to sell Brett – do you fancy buying it?

  • Washington Bullets

    What a mess. 60 years of Juche has only isolated the people there aside from the elite, who are still able to travel and purchase luxury goods abroad. It seems their policies are aimed at keeping the elite in power instead of providing the actual equality and meeting of social needs that socialist thought usually entails. They should look to China and South Korea and find a healthy medium of where they should focus their economic power. I do think the United States cares too much about the North Korean “threat” and their drills do nothing but inspire fear among the North, however the South Koreans do rely on the US for strategic nuclear deterrent and defense, and all of this posturing on the part of the North Koreans is doing them no justice in the long run if they are trying to make their lives better down the road. If either side goes to war, who really wins? South Korea, the one faction that could really help the North assimilate into the 21st century global economy, will be laid to waste by shelling, the North will also be decimated and the United States and China will be staring at each other from across the negotiating table with nothing to talk about like they’re on some nightmare first-date from hell. I understand so much of the North’s economy is based on their military, but so is the United States. Either way, the North Koreans can play the victim card, whether it be from the International Community, The US, SK, Japan, or even China, which makes them (North Korea) very dangerous considering where their allegiances and strategic posturing put them.

    • Chris McKenna

      Love the first date idea.

      • rareking

        long, all in one paragraph is bad writing said my teacher, I kinda agree.

        • Washington Bullets

          I agree, thank you for pointing that out. I was on a rant and not paying attention to my form.

        • AnonymousQ

          However, aside from the lack of paragraphs, it was rather well-written unlike your grammatically incorrect and barely coherent run-on sentence.

    • Bernd von Anon

      Well,
      thatsthejoke.gif
      North Korea IS all about keeping just the elite in power by any means against the populate, and that mean is maintaining some degree of poverty.
      Kim Ill Sung told that to a shocked Soviet Politician, that you should not allow the people to be too well.
      And elder GDR Diplomats openly compared North Korea with Nazi-Germany.

  • http://twitter.com/khawachen Karze

    Every dictators are fats ass like KIM and Mao. Both of them dine on dozen and dozen of courses of meal but million died during their rule due to starvation.

  • Xiu

    Call him fat or stupid or whatever you will. I’ll call him by where he is really at; a pawn, a slave, a puppet monarch- same as his father, ruled by the military junta his grandfather accidentally set up. Poor little fatty just has to do what he is told, else his entire family line gets slaughtered, and his seed wiped from the planet for good. Is he a bad man? Is he a good man? Is he strong or weak? Who knows? All of you would do what you were told if you were in his shoes.

    • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

      Well if I had a nation that worshiped me as a living man god, and had an ego the size of China and Russia combined, and had access to illicit Imperialist movies like Transformers, I’d do whatever it takes to keep myself in such lofty position.

      • MonkeyMouth

        ya. he’s higher on god than james brown

  • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

    Oh look, turns out he wasn’t going to drown Imperialist America and the South Korean puppet government in a sea of nuclear fire, what a shock.

    I am left speechless, how can such a man make such posturing and then not deliver? ooooooh….

  • Alex L

    When Dennis Rodman goes to live in N. Korea for good, then we need to start worrying…

  • YourSupremeCommander

    I thought the CIA and MI6 have special agents that can go anywhere and can take out any specific target… I guess I watch too many movies.

    • http://www.chinasmack.com/ MrT

      The mainly just come here and post bollocks.
      No need to get out of bed for them.

    • Chris McKenna

      I’m also confused. I mean didn’t North Korea invade the White House and take the president hostage? Why isn’t anyone doing anything about that?

  • http://www.chinasmack.com/ MrT

    Does any one think this was a secret?
    I don’t, I have proof also.

  • B*tches, Leave

    There was a funny scene in the movie “Iron Fist”. The Nazis are starting their attack from the moon and the leaders of the world assembled to discuss the situation. First they accuse India of the attack (because they see the swastika on the Nazi aircraft and then see the reverse swastika on the Indian embassador’s ring), but then the North Korea embassador stands up and says “No, these are our aircrafts, our great leader built them to show his greatness” … to which the whole room starting laughing :))))

    • B*tches, Leave

      sorry, the movie’s name is “Iron Sky” … and sorry for my English there, don’t know what happened :}

    • Rageman

      HAHAHA yeah I remember that :))) they all laugh and then somebody says “sit down, North Korea, this is serious” :))) I think that was the only moment in the movie that was funny

  • Chris McKenna

    Okay so I’m not saying this is a good idea, I’m just throwing it out there as a question: Might it be better in the longer term if the US and South Korea invaded and reunited Korea?

    • Germandude

      Look at Afghanistan and Iraq and I think you have your answer.

      Again: Barking dogs don’t bite.

      The consequences of a military interference in North Korea are unpredictable and carry more risks than benefits. Real changes into a country can only come from the inside, not from abroad.

      • http://sinopathic.com/ terroir

        The US is awesome at infiltrating countries and destroying objectives; however, it isn’t so good at occupation.

        Also: the bodyguard escort missions are the worst ones in the game.

        • https://www.facebook.com/dinie.akhemu Gerhana

          the world have moved on from call of duty…. to resident evil 6.

        • Germandude

          The last call of duty that I played was CoD 2 (ten years ago?). CoD is like Hollywood: Much show, no depth.

      • hess

        Comparing North Korea to Afghanistan and Iraq isn’t exactly fair, you’re not gonna have a bunch of talibans and other muslim extremists trying to take control of the country.

        • mr.wiener

          I could envision a long and nasty guerilla war though, Putting that humpty back together again would be a bitch.

        • Germandude

          Considering that in North Korean propaganda the capitalist west, lead by the devil USA, is “attacking the holy motherland of North Korea, the one and only country that has not yet fallen to the capitalist, raping and murdering western devils” (sth like that), I am sure you would find some hardcore “real DPRK freedom fighters”. Rather sooner than later.

          Even if a society is in war with its own government, a foreign invader often unites people to fight the unknown enemy.

          • hess

            Try checking out some sites like dailynk to see how effective the propaganda actually is on north koreans

    • http://sinopathic.com/ terroir

      Goodbye Seoul, located within shelling range of the N Korean border.

      Millions die, but hey, Call of Duty gets a new villain that isn’t the Ruskies again

    • Brett

      South Koreans don’t want to unite with the North. Aside from the social, cultural, and educational hurdles; who’s going to pay for it, you?

  • Bugs Bunny

    his hairstyle is cool
    hahaha

    • ophiolater

      Catch you now, baby!

  • N0WBIE

    What a dicktator

  • https://www.facebook.com/dinie.akhemu Gerhana

    the secret command is not a secret but more like a deliberate leak of information for their own advantages. Now that we think he wont fire the first shot, that is exactly what he will do so when the war begins, he is not to be blame but the evil American and their southern brothers. Straight out of Sun Tzu art of war and seduction. He must have been a playboy warlord in NK.

    well, whether he will go through with the plan is another story.

    • http://sinopathic.com/ terroir

      But nobody believes it, everybody has called their bluff and nobody is honestly afraid. There’s some N Korean Watch that has a Twitter feed that commented on this with the alert “meh”.

      Sun Tsu would be annoyed.

      • https://www.facebook.com/dinie.akhemu Gerhana

        have you the address for the Watch’s twitter?

        • http://sinopathic.com/ terroir

          Sorry, no. And if you want the skinny, they don’t actually say “meh” — they mean it, tho. But I’m sure it’s “North Korea Watch” or something like that.

          But hey, Sun Tzu would still be annoyed.

          • https://www.facebook.com/dinie.akhemu Gerhana

            I imagine he would be…

  • The Enlightened Out

    North Korea is the joke of the world. Thank you China for creating Frankenstein!

    Just remember it is your fault when millions of war torn peasants rush the borders into China. You reap what you sow!

    • carmouflagger

      Russia & the US created NK not China.

      • mr.wiener

        True, but they’re about their only “friend” now.

        • Panda Banana

          right, and we all need friends now and then…:-)

          • mr.wiener

            China probably thinks with friends like this who needs enemies?
            North Korea is like the completely nuts kid who hangs around with a group , kind of a scary mascot.

          • https://www.facebook.com/dinie.akhemu Gerhana

            Dear boy, you are not describing me are you? what malarkey. Right ho, time to shag someone. Smashing!

          • Beelzebub

            smashing, spiffing! tally ho!

          • mr.wiener

            Take two asterisks and see let me know if you are feeling better tomorrow.

          • Beelzebub

            Im only joshing with you chief, nothing personal. If anything all this banter will keep you young and sharp.

          • mr.wiener

            Right.
            That does it, I’m out of here before I become ill with whatever speech patterns you’ve caught off Alain.

          • Beelzebub

            Nothing wrong with dear boy, it is a term of affection if anything!

          • mr.wiener

            It’s the type of affection that has me worried.
            call me homophobic ,but I prefer a strong punch to the shoulder after a good rugby tackle as a show of manly affection.

          • Beelzebub

            No worries.

            With me gammy back from lugging heavy shite about in me youth, I’m a bit too weak for homoerotic things such as tackling and punishment, but a handshake and clink of a beer mug or two is alright, although post 40 vino is better.

          • https://www.facebook.com/dinie.akhemu Gerhana

            quite right old chap

      • Brett

        Right, but China nurtured her to be the best psychopathic nation NK could be.

      • donscarletti

        Mao begged Stalin to support North Korea, but he sent no ground troops and forbade his Migs from crossing the Yalu River and entering North Korean airspace. The communist side of the Korean war was effectively supported by China and only China. Any Soviet aid was paid for in full by China, as the Soviets didn’t take a huge interest. North Korea may have run to the Soviets during the Sino-Soviet split, but this was simply because they were given more benefits from what was at the time the richer side. I think this counts as a huge betrayal, since Chinese paid for North Korea in blood and gold.

        America pushed Kim Il Sung’s troops back all the way from the south east extremity (which they had unilaterally invaded in defiance of the Potsdam agreement) and into the confines of the mountainous north. If it wasn’t for America, North Korea and the Kim family’s empire would cover the entire peninsular. America and the UN forces saved 2/3rds of Koreans from oppression and starvation (President Park was to Chairman Kim what RIchard “Shoebomber” Reid was to Osama bin Laden).

        I’m not sure if you are simply misinformed or are being deliberately revisionist, but what you’re saying wasn’t true then and it isn’t true now.

        • carmouflagger

          Uh what are you saying man? Are you sure it was me you wanted to reply to?

          EVERYBODY knows after the allied defeat of Japan, the US and RUSSIA split Korea into 2 at the 38th parallel.

          • donscarletti

            Yep, the Potsdam agreement, which Kim Il-Sung ignored by a military conquest of whole of Korea less than 5 years later. North Korea as we know it exists because China stopped Kim Il-Sung from getting what was coming to him, so China, not Soviet Union.

        • Duke

          Also America could have nuked both China and North Korea during that war but Eisenhower decided against it. At the time America was the only country in the world with nukes. They could have bombed both places back to the stone age but chose to be merciful instead. I don’t imagine North Korea or China would have made the same choice.

          • the other guy

            Not true, The Soviets had developed the H-Bomb a year or two before the Americans did. Also it was General MacArthur who allegedly approved the use of nuclear warfare on his own and did so without the approval of the US goverment. The international community viewed McArthur as unreliable and feared that he would drag the world to a Nuclear War. In the end it was PRESIDENT Truman who removed general McArthur from command.

          • Duke

            Yes, the Russian’s had their first successful test of a nuclear weapon in August 29, 1949, the Korean war started June 25, 1950. You really believe Russia went from first test to fully operational in less than a year? I don’t. Especially since the only reason Russia had that tech in the first place was because of spies like Klaus Fuchs. Both Russia and America developed the H bomb in 1953. Where did you get your information?

          • the other guy

            About the H-Bomb or the Thermonuclear Fusion Bomb:

            ” The quest to build a working fusion bomb began in 1950 and was an attempt to stay one step ahead of the Russians, who had recently detonated their first atomic bomb in 1949. However; the Soviet Union detonated a Hydrogen bomb almost a year before the U.S.’s first Hydrogen bomb was ready to be tested.”

            http://1949to1952.blogspot.com/2009/06/hydrogen-bomb-1952.html

            I also recommend the NatGeo Documentary “World War Two: The Apocalypse” that is, if this source lacks credibility… If not, I am sure most WW2 Books will mention how the USSR had developed the H-Bomb before the US.

          • Rick in China

            Yes, blogspot is the key to valid information. Not that I care much for the argument, BUT, the soviet’s first fusion based bomb test was in fact on August 12th, 1953. That wasn’t a true H bomb, and yielded 400 KT.. it was called the layer cake design. It’s first true H bomb was detonated at Semipalatinsk in 1955, weighing in at 1.6 megatons.

            By comparison the US “bravo” test in 1954 yielded 14.8 megatons. Your information is just wrong. In ’52 their “mike” test was 10.4 megatons….clearly Russia was far behind.

          • the other guy

            Like I said, if blogspot does not satisfy check the documentary… Although I do admit that my head it is not clear on the details, I believe it is besides the point. THE Point is that Neither the Soviets nor the US wanted to escalate in to a nuclear conflict ad both sides had nuclear weaponry. Plus, what we know today and what we they knew then are two separated things. I recall that the US was aware of the soviet development of the H-Bomb.

            Development and Testing are not the same thing.

            P.S

            The Tsar Bomba of 1961 “the most powerful artificial explosion in human history”

          • the other guy

            I was just looking at the documentary and to my my shame I do not seem to find a reference to the H-bomb, I was wrong… I admit it.

            Either way, it is clear that US did not “spare China & NK out of mercy” it was like everything a question of interest.

          • Rick in China

            I agree with the overall point, was just pointing out the historical accuracy issues with dates and who had what when. Of course nobody wanted nuclear war on a mass scale..

            Tsar Bomba was huge. Problem is, it’s not that bigger bombs couldn’t be built, it’s that there isn’t really a point – and testing larger and larger bombs just creates more and more nuclear wasteland and potential damage to your own territories via fallout so, yeah.. :D

          • Beelzebub

            just creates more and more nuclear wasteland and potential damage to your own territories via fallout

            That never seemed to bother larger countries like the USSR or present day….dare not say it, not as of where right now.

          • Hongwu Emperor

            Out of mercy no, out of fear.

            Fear that south korea would be burnt to the ground, and Japan as well…

          • linette lee

            rick in china, are you canadian or american? Don’t you think the american army did many evil things on a large scale during war.

            stupid American. ;)

          • Rick in China

            I’m Canadian, and for your 2nd question:

            Every country has done many evil things on a large scale during war, and many during non-war.

          • Duke

            Read history and you will see Rick is right. The nature of war is evil. The point of any war is to kill. Killing has always been done by savages. The name of the country doesn’t matter. Either country when faced with war will find their best savages, soldiers or killing machines(whatever you want to call them) and send them over to another country to kill. Every war in the history of the world has had, rape, torture, looting and killing. Makes me think of the Monty Python quote ” the mass hypocrisy of world governments where in violence within the society is punished yet violence between societies is rewarded” not the exact quote but something like that. War is always evil, regardless of the country.

          • MonkeyMouth

            sorry, my american friends. lets not go too heavy on the ‘history’ here. its frikkin boring and no one reads it

          • the other guy

            “chose to be merciful instead”

            Jajajaja… there was nothing merciful about it, it was just against their own interest to star a Nuclear conflict with the USSR. So please, get you fact straight.

          • Rafasa

            You Latinos really love the USSR….

          • MonkeyMouth

            why would america bomb its ally?

        • the other guy

          I don’t know why are you saying the Soviets did no take interest in the Korean War. Sure Stalin was reluctant to intervene openly in the conflict, but that was due to the political climate of the time. The USSR wanted to avoid open “conflict with the U.S so they refused to send ground troops. but they very much financed the whole operation.

          They also supplied hundreds of MiG-15 airplanes that fought in disguise under Chinese & Korean colors. As both countries where quite young at the time, they did not have a well established air force program.

          There is a funny anecdote of that time, and that is that most pilots spoke in simple Korean when flying, but at time they would randomly curse in Russian language.

          Soviet intervention might have been indirect, but without a doubt it helped to shape the war.

          Also, I feel it is unaccurate to say that Stalin did not care for NK since the Soviets pretty much helped rebuild the country in the aftermath of WWII.

          Just like the like the US, the USSR influenced and armed one party of the conflict, therefore both powers are responsible up to a certain degree for the Korean War.

        • Hongwu Emperor

          wooooooo… the ”liberators” ¬¬
          In fact neither the south or the north side is correct, neither Chinese/russian/jap/american involvement is.

          KOREA needs to unite and BECOME A KINGDOM like it was BACK ON THE JOSEON, bring back YANGBAN system, being back CONFUCIAN thought and kick the bucket on this nasty vomit-inducing lice that is both modern globalized capitalism and militarist communism.

    • Hongwu Emperor

      What if I told you…
      those ”war torn peasants” you say, could well march into the South, and totally ruin the economy there also?? there’s plenty of people to go both ways, and I doubt the South would be gunning down innocents trying to seek refuge.

      It would be soooo bad for a so-called ”human rights” following nation.

      Unless the South also became a heap pile of steaming shit, which would be the most obvious if a war truly starts.

  • http://sinopathic.com/ terroir

    “absolutely must not fire the first shot”
    “state of war”

    Yup, no contradiction there.

  • Brett

    Of course he ordered his troops not to fire. He’s too young to want to die this week.

  • Strangerland

    The beggar is screaming in the middle of the town, seeking for aids. Then when some aids come they bark for more. None given so he starts cursing all townies especially the rich townies, threatening robberies or riot act. Still no one reacted, so the beggar keeps on shouting lame threats and curses…

    • hess

      who the hell goes around asking for aids?

      • B*tches, Leave

        gay people?

  • B*tches, Leave

    heh Kimmy … what a joke ^^ April fools indeed

    • carmouflagger

      Ahhahahahhaha!!!

  • Bugs Bunny

    just feel very sad for people there.

    they become slaves for kim’s empeor dream…

    since this kim studied abroad i hope he can change the history one day.

    not easy and fast just day by day.

    sigh!

    • don mario

      yea he wants to change the history by going to war.

  • Panda Banana

    actually, there are just winners in this game, china and the US see NK as strategic important:

    1. china, cause they have a buffer country between them and the US influenced SK

    2. USA cause as long as NK exists they are very much welcomed by SK and japan, and can provide a good bunch of reasons to keep their military there..

    3. NK, cause they are getting paid, receive aid…for what?…for just being NK !

    it worked quite well for decades, but now with very limit new markets coming up, NK could be a huge draw, if they could get rid of the riling party. I would say the time is more then right at the moment. I very much doubt that NK soldiers as brainwashed as they might be, are motivated enough to risk their lives in a true combat situation. Its more likely that most of them would just lay down their weapon and go into hiding. I think that SK should provoke and incident and start this shit, later blame NK for it, march in and get rid of this bastards. I think they should play the same games, threaten NK and let them assemble their army, then back up again, back and forth, each assembling of their army would cost them a small fortune….

    • MonkeyMouth

      you like that boardgame RISK, dont you?

  • ophiolater

    i am back now!

  • Wayne

    South Korea has a woman president, an women presidents are more dangerous and likely to start a war than men, because they have to prove they are not “weak on national defense.” South Korea has been attacked several times in recent years by North Korea and sailors and civilians have died, but South Korea has been calm and patient, and not retaliated. I think next time will be different.

  • Duke

    It reminds me of the way local guys in my city always have something rude to say about the “big laowai”. They sound so tough till I turn around and ask “ni shuo shen ma?” All of a sudden it’s “I didn’t say anything” or “wow you can speak Chinese!”. Never once have they had the balls to say “yeah I said it, what are you going to do about it?” “Fatty Kim” made his comments, then America sent some B-2 bombers and F-22′s, as if to say “ni shuo shen ma?” His reaction like the reaction of local guys is nothing but predictable. Little dogs bark so much because they know how little they are and they want to scare off the big dogs before it gets physical. Just remember that a good big man beats a good little man every time. Save face and just keep your mouth shut.

    • Beelzebub

      then America sent some B-2 bombers and F-22′s

      I would have done and supported more. Sometimes nuclear is the only option, or napalm carpet the lot….

      • Duke

        I don’t think America would use nukes against north Korea. I don’t think they would need to. The B-2′s and F-22″s were to show fatty Kim that if it starts he would be one of the first to die. Those are both precision weapons systems with bombs and missiles that are accurate within 2 meters. A “war” between America and North Korea would be over pretty quickly. Using stealth and precision weapons systems, America would take out most of the North Korean military in the first few hours and there is little or nothing they could do to stop it. You can’t shoot something down if you don’t know where it is(stealth) and you can’t hide from bunker busting laser guided ordinance(which both planes can carry into North Korea undetected). Telling his military to not fire the first shot is the smartest thing fatty Kim has ever done. Their first shot would be followed shortly by their last one, then BOOM.

        • Beelzebub

          A good post but using Iran (different country and race of people, I know, I know!) neither the UK or USA showed much backbone to them over the hostage crisis (Argo, good movie, if a bit distorted of the history) nor over the more recent capture of the brit sailors, IIRC, the aussie navy was the only one that stood upto them over a skirmish in the straits of hormuz. If someone like trump was president of the US it would be more than just obamas words.

          • Duke

            Of course the Aussie navy can kick ass. Have you seen how much American or jointly developed with America tech they have on their boats! The American government are Bastards but they make the best weapons in the world. They cost more but you get what you pay for. As Australia knows which is why they get their software and hardware from America. Once they get their F-35′s Australia will be able to hit targets almost anywhere in the world. Good on ya!

  • Kate

    Meanwhile S.Koreans carry on with their lives, not really giving a dang……o(^-^)o

  • MonkeyMouth

    politics= boredom. war=distraction. it all boils down to the Illuminati, dont it>?

  • diverdude7

    yeah well,,,, in the Cool Hat war DPRK Rulz !

  • Wallythedog

    Here is what’s really weird. There are thousands of North Koreans working as loggers in Siberia, that think that they are working in North Korea. They have logging camps set up to look like they are in North Korea, but they are actually out in the middle of nowhere Siberia providing almost free labor for some Russian logging companies, with strong ties to the Russian mafia.

    • 5,000 years of uncivilization

      Interesting. Where did you learn of this?

      • YourSupremeCommander

        X-Files, Episode 43, 1995.

  • http://twitter.com/khawachen Karze

    Is Kim so OBSESE while his people are starving. Is he eating all ration like Chairman Mao during his rule.

  • concerned

    King
    John One has all the opportunity now to be a great man like Gorbachev or Deng
    Xiao Ping. Just open up the country and liberate all his people. There will
    be lots of help waiting for him to revamp his country. He is lucky to have a
    matured brother, South Korea, who can hold his hand to set the country right.
    China under Deng Xiao Ping opened up and has Taiwan and Hong Kong to help the
    ball rolling before the rest of the world dare to follow. East Germany has
    West Germany to hold its hand too.

    If King John One pulled this fast one, he will
    be recorded in North Korean history as the man who saved a nation from
    starvation and annihilation.

  • NK killer

    This sickening fatty boy is still thinking his family rules the world. Talk so much is useless. Dare him to shoot at the US first!

  • Hongwu Emperor

    Intelligent move… let the enemy move first, then set him a trap.
    Burn them to the ground, with the strenght of a tiger, swiftness of a thunder.

    Let us enemies be torn apart with our war chariots!!!

    Oooops, wrong timeframe!!

    At least he doesn’t war to truly spark a war, differently from some stupid inferior brain-dead netizens who constantly say ”lets nuke NK and everything will be ok, there’s gonna be no fallout on the southies or on the japs!!111one!!!shift!!11!”

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