High School Couples Flaunt Their Love After “Gaokao” Exam

From QQ:

Photos: Third-year high school student couples no longer keep their love a secret, showing their love openly upon leaving the “Gaokao” examination hall

2014 June 9, following the conclusion of this year’s “gaokao” [college entrance examination], a series of pictures showing high school couples holding hands as they leave the examination hall went viral online, and were forwarded on Weibo by many netizens and media outlets. The hand-holding couples caused considerable controversy, and received both praise and criticism from netizens.

Comments from QQ:

死灵

Having their wedding night before the “roll of honor” has been published. [“roll of honor” (金榜题名) refers to a good exam score. In ancient China, the enrollment list was published after the imperial examinations. Students who were enrolled could enter into government or political offices and acquire fame and/or power. This netizen is making a comparison between today’s college entrance examination and the imperial examination system (科举) of ancient China.]

梁子留死灵 (responding to the above)

A month later there will be an abortion boom.

哗啦啦转身

I wonder, would their parents see this and give their blessings? If it were my daughter, I wouldn’t be able to accept this. People should do what’s the appropriate thing for their age. And [children] at this young age, they should still make their studies their focus [as opposed to dating and relationships].

珠光宝气

Positive education will also create a fine generation. I’m a member of the post-’80s generation and back then [when we were their age], we were also given various negative labels, but now we have become the rising generation. Who has not been young and frivolous? Let’s not always judge the hope of our future [the young generation] with an old-fashioned way of looking at things. When they’ve passed 30 and look back on their youth, they will have some wonderful memories!

金华

They’re all at an age of dreams. Young Chinese of the past could only think [of doing such things], but today’s youth can not only think but also do. Having some experiences [of love] earlier can also help them grow up [mature] faster, and there is nothing bad with that.

凱旋觷

Firstly, this is being a little too flashy [flaunting]… your test scores haven’t even come out yet [so don’t celebrate too soon]. ╮(╯▽╰)╭ Also, I’m personally not against the freedom to love; it’s quite good.
[Bute] safety precautions [referring to birth control] are essential, hehe.

小啾啾~

My husband and I also became a couple in high school, and our child is now two years old. Our feelings for each other are unchanged. Regarding falling in love at a young age, I just want to say that those who follow through to the end are worthy of our blessings! Don’t care what other people think – if you think that it’s right then go for it! Those of you who are so certain that it’s wrong, did you never have a relationship when you were young? Never had a crush on someone? Never held back your true feelings for someone? It’s just that people from different times have different ways of expressing themselves. Now society is more and more open. This is society’s progress, allowing children to express their feelings!

Aqua1

Liang and Zhu were probably even younger than these high school students, but their story is still told and praised today! This has been a Chinese characteristic since ancient times… [Liang and Zhu refers to The Butterfly Lovers – a Chinese legend of a tragic love story between Liang Shanbo (梁山伯) and Zhu Yingtai (祝英台). The story is often regarded as the Chinese equivalent of Romeo and Juliet.]

帅:0锅

The aunties at the pharmacies are laughing, the hotel owners are laughing, and half a month later, the hospital directors will be laughing! In the end, when they [realize they’ve] failed the exam, their whole family will be crying! [Explanation: “the aunties at the pharmacy”, the “hotel owners” and the “hospital directors” all stand to make profit from young lovers by selling birth control, providing rooms, and performing abortions.]

嘟嘟

Good, what’s so strange about this? Student romances are the purest, as they have not been polluted by materialistic desires. I give you my sincere best wishes!

夏大燕

Can you [students in the photos] be more low-key [about this, as opposed to flaunting it]? Just how many [early student romances] will actually follow through to the end [lifetime marriage]?

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  • Zappa Frank

    opposition is really unresonable, expecially those who think that every relation have to end in marriage to be considered something good. i guess some got simply envydious because they weren’t able to have a girlfriend at their time.

    i think the best comment is:

    They’re all at an age of dreams. Young Chinese of the past could only think [of doing such things], but today’s youth can not only think but also do. Having some experiences [of love] earlier can also help them grow up [mature] faster, and there is nothing bad with that.

    • mr.wiener

      I wouldn’t buy a pair of shoes without trying them on first.

      • Mighty曹

        But…. shoes wear out eventually. :(

        • noodles76

          So do girlfriends.

          • Mighty曹

            Yes, I was adding to mr.wiener’s metaphor for the ‘right girlfriend’.

        • mr.wiener

          Not if you look after them.
          Also you need to find a pair of shoes that will last.

          • Mighty曹

            Expensive shoes are more well made and seem to last longer.

        • Michael .

          Not if you take good care of them and choose ones that are built well. My work boots are 23 years old and still going strong. If you take care of them, inside and out, are careful with their surroundings and pick them up and clean them off when they get into something, they will last a long, long time. ;)

      • Stefan

        So you girls as an object to “try”?

        • mr.wiener

          You need to find the right person right person to “fit” with you, whether it is at a physical, mental, spiritual level.
          Life is a buffet at that age, you should try new things.

          • Boris

            But eat the wrong thing and you end up with intense diarea and a few days in the hospital. I’m never eating at that Korean buffet again.

          • mr.wiener

            See, you learnt something important. You will never wonder “what would that Korean buffet have been like ?”

          • Boris

            I nearly died.

            In all seriousness, there are some choices, when made that cannot be taken back.

        • Lei Feng’s Hat

          Yeah, Stefan, think about it this way…

          Right now you are, no doubt, walking around in a pair of neon-green Crocs…but, every time you see a pair of Converse Chuck Taylor’s…you get a strange, troubling feeling in your loins.

          Explore that feeling, young man!

          • Kai

            Yeah, gonna go with Chuck Taylors on this one.

  • WangDN

    It’s nice to see young Chinese people doing some normal for once!
    Chinese society demonizes love, whilst glorifying war and nationalism.
    Student’s of mine have told me that in their “political and moral education” classes, they are constantly warned of the numerous dangerous of “young love”, whilst being encouraged to war ultra-violent films about the China-Japan war. It is the
    worst kind of brain washing!

    China needs more love and less hate in its society. To quote Ron Paul:

    “My advice: Leave the young people alone and they’ll find out that they prefer lovemaking to warmongering and are more anxious to get along with one another than the older generation who still stir the pots of war.”

    • Insomnicide

      Have you seen Chinese films lately? Over 70% of them are romantic-comedies. I think it’s the other way around, the kids are brainwashed about love then throw into the real world where not everyone enters a relationship for love.

      • Irvin

        I’ve entered 4 relationships, including my first, for the sole purpose of sex.

        • David

          Wow, 4? You must be so proud tiger.

          • noodles76

            Maybe he’s 17? I dunno….

          • Irvin

            Reading comprehension is powerful, try it. For example, any words with “ed” at the end means it’s past tense.

            In addition “I’ve ate 4 burgers at mcd” is not the same as “I’ve only ever ate 4 burgers at mcd”.

          • David

            I know it is past tense. I answered it that way. It was a strange comment so I answered it with sarcasm. It is not a contest, so I actually don’t care how many girls you have bagged. But if it had been more you would have said a higher number. BTW your correct it is not the same because it is “I’ve eaten 4 burgers at McD” ate is present tense eaten is past tense. Also, ‘ever’ is redundant if you say ‘only’ it is all you need.

          • Zappa Frank

            hahaha, I think is a bit unfair but too funny

          • David

            Yea, I was going for the cheap laugh, I knew what he meant. : )

        • mr.wiener

          Well let’s face it. at that age you are a life support system for a penis.

          • donscarletti

            Yep, and for the other 12 years of life we’re preparing to become a life support system for a penis.

          • Mighty曹

            Let’s hope the penis will never be on life support system.

          • Irvin

            Any guy who claims their first relationship is about love is just bullshitting.

          • Stefan

            I’m not bullshitting.

          • Irvin

            You’re lying.

          • Gordon Gogodancer

            :D

        • FYIADragoon

          That’s sad. Hopefully one day, you realize that sex is just one aspect of a relationship.

          • Irvin

            It is BECAUSE of those relationships that I’ve eventually transcend beyond sexual needs in a relationships.

        • Mighty曹

          Have you tried a relationship with a woman?

        • WangDN

          Well done…

      • ninxay

        I thought at least half are depictions of super-heroic acts against the Japanese devils?
        I turn on the (CC)TV and see nothing on but romantic talk shows, War Against Japan serials, hoary Ancient China re-enactments and I might as well leave my brain in a jar.

    • NeverMind

      Students of yours must be a minority. I’m kinda bored of seeing young kids flaunt their love openly on Qzone. You should venture outdoors once in a while bro.

  • Joey

    Man, those comments… We’re not living in Victorian times anymore, netizens.

    I’m happy for the couples. Your time of suffering is almost over, time to enjoy life.

    • NeverMind

      Could there be a reason why Asian kids are regularly trouncing the natives in Western countries both in terms of educational qualifications and job positions? Just saying…

      • Don’t Believe the Hype

        who told you that Asian kids were trouncing western natives?

        • Alphy

          Maybe he live close to UCLA where Asian has a higher percentage than White? Though it is true that Asian-Americans do score exceptionally high. So high in fact affirmative action work against Asian.

          • Dr Sun

            really, there are more asians than all others living in and around UCLA ?
            UCLA admission data states only 38% asian.

            https://www.admission.ucla.edu/campusprofile.htm

            got any proof of that

          • Alphy

            In UCLA more Asian than white, there happy?

      • MeCampbell30

        Maybe Asian-American kids, but not all of Asia’s children. Don’t get it twisted.

      • Zappa Frank

        western countries? maybe you mean only America and Canada..

      • ex-expat

        Could there be a reason why Westerners trounce Chinese on the mainland?

        • Dr Sun

          not really, all I can think of is dejected ESL teachers that cannot find a girlfriend, HK supremacists and the white power crowd that infest the site.

          • wes707

            And who are you? The voice of reason? Sounds like you’re no better than the people you criticize. Just curious, where are you originally from?

          • Dr Sun

            I’m me, yes, planet earth, you ?

          • ex-expat

            Even the worst of the worst expat makes more money and gets more women than 99% of anyone on the mainland…but you already knew that.

          • Dr Sun

            really even the “worse” the of expats make more money than the 132 Chinese billionaires and gets more women than the 758,000 chinese millionaires. I doubt your assumption very much.

          • ex-expat

            Did you actually read my post (esp. the part where I said 99%)?

            Wow, 758,000 people!

            758,000/1,500,000,000 = .0005

            In 2011, average monthly pay for ALL Chinese = 4,672 rmb

            I have yet to meet an expat that makes anywhere near 5,000 rmb

            And I suggest you talk to the 30,000,000 million men that won’t be able to find wives this generation, and then talk to expats about how easy it is for them…

          • Dr Sun

            I was making a point about how ridiculous your statement was.

            More than 1% of the population earn more than 5000 RMB a month, many expats earn less, so “.Even the worst of the worst expat makes more money….than 99% of anyone on the mainland” is totally flawed.

            As is your speculative assumption that they get more women.

          • ex-expat

            Hahaha ok keep lying to yourself.

      • RiverHorser

        thats rubbish. i know those reports and eg the numbers for china are heavily skewed to very elitist schools which train particular for those kind of testing. PISA tests and that ilk favour students which memorize is. If you ask an asian student to explain it you will receive always the same answer but not an explanation for its root cause.

      • RiverHorser

        on another note…china has that education system for centuries and yet has produced hardly any evidence of great academic posibilities …

      • wes707

        Really, trouncing natives in Western countries? Yes, Asian kids from their authoritarian upbringings (tiger moms, etc.) and traditional Confucian orientation to rote learning do well on standardized exams, as they should for the sheer amount of time they spend studying, but they are far from the majority of actual innovators that produce breakthroughs in their respective fields.

        Look at all the Nobel Prize winners:
        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Nobel_laureates

        Look at the famous alumni of Caltech, MIT, etc.:
        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/California_Institute_of_Technology#Alumni
        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Massachusetts_Institute_of_Technology#Alumni

        Furthermore, if Asians are so smart, why do Western universities trounce Asian universities?
        http://www.shanghairanking.com/ARWU2013.html

        Also in case you didn’t know, universities and every field of natural science and social science did not originate in Asia.

      • Dr Sun

        I take it you have numerous links of this from reputable sites to support this wild assertion ?

    • Lol, you haven’t seen the worse of it. This is just the beginning of a long, long road ….

  • Public displays of affection…Chairman Mao must be rolling over in his glass case

  • Alphy

    This is probably one of the biggest cultural gap I see still in China today from the West. Most parents still believe until you graduate from college, student should only focus on study and no dating is allow. Students still do it regardless but few will tell their parents unless they are in their last two years in College.

    I don’t know about other places, but in the States it’s hard to find a girl without a boyfriend in high school let alone in college. There’s such a big emphasis in dating and relationship for teenagers in the States, where in China, those that do are in the fringe.

    • donscarletti

      And yet Chinese KTVs are full of pretty 16-20 year old girls willing to be fondled for an evening by unfamiliar men old enough to be their grandfathers for a couple of hundred yuan.

      Most of them will be quite happy to consumate their “date” with any but the most obese, vulgur and unhygenic of these men for an extra thousand.

      Yet they will sit there, on a stranger’s lap, chatting with the other young girls and men, each espousing similar values to the commenters above.

      China’s cultural gap is with itself. The world is full of prudes and whores, but rarely are they so close.

      • Mighty曹

        Maybe those are the girls who didn’t pass the Gaokao or those who prematurely celebrated, got pregnant and quit school.

        • donscarletti

          When modern Chinese girls have unplanned pregnancies, even with their longterm, stable boyfriends, they abort it right away lest it influence their future plans for study and plausible virginity on their wedding day.

          As for failing the Gaokao, yes, quite probably.

          • Mighty曹

            I wonder what the percentage of that would be as I’m positive not 100% of the pregnancies result in an abortion.

          • donscarletti

            According to available sources, 13 million people, or 1% of the population have a surgical abortion at a registered hospital in China every year (a). This does not include unregistered clinics and medically induced abortions (RU486 etc), of which people speculate from being a small minority of abortions all the way to being the vast majority.

            As women of fertile age (b) make up only 18.5% of people in China (c), then is 5.4% of women of child bearing age have an abortion each year.

            if we were to assume that the chances of any given women having a surgical abortion at a registered hospital in a given year is constant, we can calculate that is a 75.1% chance of her having 1 or more of such abortions before her 40th birthday and a 39.5% chance of having 2 or more.

            These numbers are patently ridiculous because the chances of any given women having a surgical abortion at a registered hospital in a given year obviously isn’t a constant. I just don’t have any data to model this and I don’t think I can get it any time soon. An common-sense guess would be to assume that those who have had abortions are more likely to have a second. You could model this quite well with only a small sample by asking women having an abortion how many they have had before and their age, but I have no intention of doing this.

            China has 1.27 live births per 100 people (d) each year. If we were to ignore unregistered abortion, medically induced abortion, take miscarriage rate to 20% of known pregnancies intended for live birth (assuming surgical abortion to happen before spontneous abortion can take place) and take stillbirth as 0.5% of live birth, we could say 38.6% of known pregnancies end in a registered, surgical abortion and 49.0% end in a live birth.

            That’s my stats for the day. Most of this stuff is pretty hard to find the right information to model correctly and so some of this is a little unscientific and inaccurate.

            (a)
            http://world.time.com/2013/09/30/what-happens-when-only-1-2-of-chinese-women-take-the-pill-13-million-abortions/

            (b)
            I am estimating “fertile age” here to be 15-40, a woman can conceive after 40 and any time until menopause, but it is difficult enough that I will assume accidental pregnancies are rare. Also various sources vaguely suggest it is younger women getting abortions.

            (c)
            I added number of women 15-25 to half of women 25-55 from CIA world factbook (https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/geos/ch.html) then divided the total abortions by it. This assumes distribution in 25-55 group is uniform, which it isn’t, but is close.

            (d) https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/geos/ch.html 12.17 births/1,000 population (2014 est.)

          • Mighty曹

            Mind-Effing-Boggling! My next curiosity, what is the percentage of abortions were due to the ‘Single Child Policy’?

          • noodles76

            The number still seems VERY low. Most Chinese of high school age have only extremely basic and sometimes flat out incorrect knowledge of how the reproductive system works and many are afraid to buy condoms/the pill. And I get why.

            Before we had our wedding ceremony (but after we were married) my wife went on the pill. When she went to buy it, one of the clerks asked her what she needed it for. With me standing right next to her. The wife isn’t shy….she flat out told her, I want to fuck my husband but don’t want a kid…got a problem? I laughed my ass off. Not many teenagers would be willing to put themselves in a position to be judged/questioned like that. Especially since it may get back to their family.

          • mr.wiener

            Some hospitals in Taiwan have a little temple nearby where women can go to apologise to their aborted fetuses.

          • ikoihil

            RU486 does NOT cause abortion. It stops an egg from being released from a woman’s ovary and thus prevents any chance of fertilization and pregnancy. The drug also makes it more difficult for a fertilized egg to implant in a woman’s uterus.

            Technically, that’s not an abortion.

          • noodles76

            I’d say by FAR…most do. Remember, if the girl isn’t married, the kid isn’t even getting a hukou. It’s illegal for an unmarried woman of any age to have a child on the mainland. They’ll face at best…heavy fines. They won’t be able to get medical care at any hospital either.

            Far from a teenager, my wife’s Aunt had a baby as a single woman. She had to marry some random friend just to get the kid listed on the hukou.

          • Rick in China

            I wouldn’t say that it’s by far because of the single child policy – I’d say the opposite, and by far it’s because of unwanted pregnancy. I went to an abortion once. It was extremely fucking disturbing.
            It was supposed to be one of the ‘better’ places, yet it had a cold slightly dirty-white tile wall/floor everywhere feeling, plastic blue bucket seats bolted to the wall, and at the ‘waiting’ hall, filled with like 20 guys playing on their cell phones. From the looks of things, I can only guess most of the situations were guys who were nice enough to pay for the abortion, with the occasional poor soul walking out in pain, alone. It was a fuckin tragic place to be, and one that I think too many young women here experience, maybe due to lack of sex ed., maybe due to lack of respectful men, I’ve no idea..

          • noodles76

            My earlier remark did not touch on the single child policy at all. Not directly at any rate.

            Another thing to consider when discussing the teenage (or otherwise) rates of abortion…is that you can freely purchase the ‘morning after’ pill (donscarletti mentioned that earlier). It won’t show up on gov’t records. I know girls/women who run the potential risk of doing their body and reproductive system serious and irrevocable harm because of that pill and how easy it is to obtain. Combine that with both ignorance and willful ignorance of what I would consider to be common knowledge and you have a ‘perfect storm’ of stupidity. I’ve seen grown ass women pop that pill like it’s candy (more than 3x a year) yet balk at taking preventative measures. Mind boggling.

            Abortion here does not carry the same stigma it does in some ‘western’ countries. I am actually glad for that. I do wish there was better education on the subjects of sex/pregnancy/vd though.

          • Rick in China

            Oh – I was reading it in context of reply to Mighty, so thought you meant “I’d say by FAR” in response to the “the percentage of abortions were due to the ‘Single Child Policy'” bit.. my mistake.

            I agree that there is a stigma against discussing these topics (abortion/STD), but as for approaching/surpassing the rates in many African countries, no way. RATES? No way, total population infected? Maybe. Actually there is some awareness here around HIV specifically, but mostly in border towns in Yunnan and the like where there is significant HIV infection due mostly to intravenous drug use/sharing needles/prostitution – I don’t have any idea about anything beyond that because, as you say, it’s kept under wraps.. speaking of which, maybe that’s a good point to make for those who frequent hookers, or equally, randoms from bars :P, since STD stats kept so quiet, KEEP IT UNDER WRAPS :D

          • noodles76

            Perhaps we read the same comment but interpreted it differently. That’s OK. I think it brought some interesting points from both parties into the conversation.

            EDIT: I am out of beer. FUCK!!!

          • Rick in China

            It’s 2:40pm. Typically there’s tons of beer in my office. None now. I’m doing a beer run to 7-11 for stacks of Asahi in 20min. Happy Friday :D

          • noodles76

            Man….there was a 7-11 near my house for 5 months. it recently closed. As did most other Japanese owned convenience stores. I am so sad. I am stuck with beer in a bag.
            PS….Today is Friday? Wheeeee! They all kind of blend together for me. haha

          • Rick in China

            What? Beer in a bag? Do you live in Qingdao? Haven’t heard of other cities in China with beer in bags…

          • noodles76

            I do live in Qingdao.

          • Rick in China

            Then I slightly envy you. Fresher air, fresher beer, ocean — you can go sailing for a couple hundred rmb in the olympic harbour. I’m in f’n polluted Chengdu landlocked near the himilayas where ‘fresh seafood’ means only been in a box for 3 days. *I* have reasons to drink excessively. :P

          • Zappa Frank

            you have your teahouses, spicy food and old hags that like to quarrel..

          • Rick in China

            Good point. Hags do keep me on my toes.

          • ex-expat

            It’s funny, I have heard many in China say they regard Chengdu as one of the best cities in China. I don’t think it is anything special really, even for China. Though I did like it more than where I lived (Beijing).

          • Zappa Frank

            I think they talk about Sichuan beauties, I do not agree, to me are more or less like other Chinese girls..

          • ex-expat

            I agree. I also didn’t notice anything special.

          • Rick in China

            There is nothing special.

            They talk about “Sichuan Beauties” because they claim the women have softer personalities, whiter skin, and are typically more fair in most senses (as in not ridge bone structure as “northern” people, not monkey lip&nose like “canton” people, not wind-burned skin like autonomous region people, etc). That’s what I’m told. Also, typically Sichuan women are thin, maybe because they eat so much spice – and get massive peep (peeing replacing poop, result of spicy food) which empties their bodies of caloric intake or something.

            Overall Chengdu is actually a pretty chill and good place to be – especially for those inclined to *chill* or involved in software development, but aside from those two aspects it’s nothing special..

          • Zappa Frank

            nothing special? and what about pandas! don’t forget pandas!!

          • Rick in China

            This is what pandas REALLY look like.

            Fuckin dirtpigging sloppy should-be-dead animal if you ask me.

          • Insomnicide

            If they weren’t endangered, I’d get one as a pet.

          • noodles76

            peep? Oh….wow. Just…wow.

          • Rick in China

            I came up with it recently. Someone specifically asked what the diet was like in Sichuan had they moved here, and whether the ‘western stomach’ would take much acclimatisation, I came up with peeping. I think my exact words were:

            You will likely poop more. Except the poop is like pee. You will peep frequently.

          • Zappa Frank

            拉肚子

          • Yes!

            Isn’t there a popular Chinese saying that goes like this, “Once they get to Chongqing, the married men realise they married too early”.

          • noodles76

            I think that saying may apply to…well….just about anywhere on Earth.

          • Zappa Frank

            nah..i’ve been to chongqing too… months.. i cannot say if is due to different beauty standards, but really i do not think girls in chongqing are better than girls in shanghai, beijing or anywhere else i’ve been..
            funny thing was a girl in chongqing that replyed me all beauty i’ve seen in shanghai or beijing eventually must be sichuanese..or plastic..
            well anyway, i remember also in hunan they claim to have beautiful girls, and my former chinese teacher from shenyang strongly remark that the most beautiful chinese girls are from dongbei, because taller and more pale… apparently anyone reclaim to have the most beautiful girls..

          • Insomnicide

            In poor countries, when they have nothing else, all they do is boast about the beauty of women. Happens in China, happens in many Slavic countries like Russia, Poland, Ukraine, etc.

          • Zappa Frank

            but happen also in countries that poor are not at all, like Sweden.. Some countries push it for chauvinism, even in Italy they do believe to have women more beautiful than abroad, but sadly it is not true…

          • ex-expat

            Good question. I know chongqing and chengdu have kind of a rivalry going on, but that’s about it.

          • noodles76

            If the air is fresher here, I feel sorry for you man. Also, I am about as likely to go swimming here as you are in landlocked Chengdu. The reason starts with a P and ends in an N, I’m sure you can put it together.

          • ex-expat

            You guys don’t have shit on Beijing. I had respiratory infections up the ass for the first two years of living there. Though amazingly since leaving over a year ago, I have not been sick once.

          • noodles76

            Grats.

        • Ryo Saeba

          Actually, they are the ones that figured out early on that their beauty can earn them 10 times more money then any graduate.

          Unfortunately, they usually piss it all away on food, clothes, parties, gambling, or give it to their pimp boyfriend.

          • Mighty曹

            Hahaha… truth!

          • Dr Sun

            how do you know this ?

        • Dick Leigh

          Every weekend at my university there was a line of luxury cars waiting to take girls… somewhere. Of course there were tons of rumours about what those girls were up to but I don’t know the truth.

          • Dr Sun

            I don’t know you are from or how sheltered a life you have had, but I guess you have never been to or outside a Sorority house at a U.S university.

          • Mighty曹

            I’m sure those are not the rich parents picking them up for the weekend. Sugar daddies, maybe.

      • Alphy

        Well you can say the same about stripper and escort in the States? That doesn’t mean all girls in the States are willing to strip down in front of any old fart, and the same about China’s KTV girls.

        I think you stray from the subject here.

        • donscarletti

          I’ve never been to a strip club nor hired an escort so I cannot really agree or disagree with your comparison from a functional perspective.

          However I can say that I have done neither because I have seen them both very “marginal” parts of society and possibly the participants consider themselves as such. I’ve always imagined most strippers and hookers being covered in injection scars and showing signs of malnourishment, which is why I’ve never been inclined to try.

          In China, these KTVs are an integral part of the life of businessmen and officials, and the girls at least superficially resemble the sort of women I’d actually want to date.

          So there is a distinction. You can refer to my “whores and prudes” remark that I never claimed selling varying degrees of intimacy was a distinctly Chinese thing. What is distinctively Chinese is that the mainstream embraces them both so closely.

          • Zappa Frank

            sincerely I think are integral part of many lives, not just in china. we had a 1st minister that made of them his first worry during a terrible economic crisis. I don’t know in US since I’ve never lived there, but I wouldn’t say it is just a Chinese thing…

          • Rick in China

            That’s exactly it, what you can point out specifically, is here — whoring is basically under the umbrella of “Business Entertainment” – alongside so many other things. It’s just classified as a general group of expense, one which can be reported exactly under the same wording to the tax bureau.

            In the US, I imagine, or most places, you don’t call whoring business entertainment? I’m sure there’s some other euphemism, but I don’t think everyone would accept it as being under that public or broad of a title… without sneering and laughing about it.

          • Kai

            Actually, you can, and companies expense it as such. Wolf of Wall Street, anyone? Mad Men?

            The only thing they have to fear is having an IRS agent audit every specific expense, which doesn’t usually happen with such scrutiny.

            Historically, what wealthier businessmen do in the course of “doing business” isn’t too different between China and the US (or many other countries). However, there are differences in terms of how “publicly acceptable” it is among the general population.

            If you go around publicly boasting about whoring in the course of doing business in the US, you’re liable to get some nasty sideways glances (unless you’re doing so only with the “good old boys” who engage in the same activities). It’s mostly similar in China but there’s arguably a lot more implicit acceptance or resignation to it from the female population. There is less social stigma attached to it in China (and many other countries) than in the US.

            This isn’t to say things won’t change in China, but I think a major factor is the economic role, power, and independence of women in society. China is definitely behind the US in this regard.

            The idealistic pseudo-Communists once largely stamped out prostitution and lifted many women up to positions of power and influence (though this shouldn’t be overstated in general). They once pointed to the decadent, lascivious, exploitive lifestyles of Western “capitalists”. Then their ideals fell by the wayside for economic pragmatism, and men and women went back to doing what they were wont to do.

          • Rick in China

            “Wolf of Wall Street, anyone? Mad Men?”

            Do you seriously get your information from tv series based decades ago, and movies..based…decades ago, when queeludes, existed?

            Come on now Kai. Get real. This is a ridiculous reply to the situation. “Well..uhm, in ancient China TV shows, men had multiple wives who poisoned eachother to win affection of the alpha male. So suck it up cupcake, I only fuck massage girls.”. Equivalent.

            The rest of the post is fluff, not sure what else to say.

          • Kai

            No, I don’t get my information (only) from TV shows and movies. I allude to pop culture references because they help people grasp points more quickly.

            The fact is that companies expensing prostitution as “entertainment expenses” is a known phenomenon. You asked a question…

            In the US, I imagine, or most places, you don’t call whoring business entertainment? I’m sure there’s some other euphemism, but I don’t think everyone would accept it as being under that public or broad of a title… without sneering and laughing about it.

            …and I responded with what I know.

            I don’t understand how your last two paragraphs relate to what I said. And, dude, why the hostility here?

          • Alphy

            Ever heard of the Dongquan crackdown? These so call KTV (and btw there are many legit ones as well in case you didn’t know) are suppose to be illegal. Strip clubs in the States are not, neither are sex services in many Western countries.

            It’s obvious the CCP is corrupted as hell and haven’t crack down on it for real, but it doesn’t mean it always has been that way. Before the opening up it was almost impossible to find such a place much cleaner than even places like Hong Kong.

            The point is, just because these Entertainment exist (and yes it is all over the place) doesn’t mean you can say the culture isn’t very conservative when it comes to the right age to start dating. There are a lot of people in China and if you pay enough money people will do basically anything. Many of these KTV girls are making more than most Doctors, stock broker and Engineers, that’s a powerful incentive if there is ever one.

          • donscarletti

            “The point is, just because these Entertainment exist (and yes it is all over the place) doesn’t mean you can say the culture isn’t very conservative when it comes to the right age to start dating.”

            That’s my point, it’s a paradox. The society both is very conservative in saying what age a girl is to start dating, but very liberal about what age a girl should be before you start chasing her.

            You mentioned the other key paradox. Prostitution and these kind of clubs are illegal in China, yet is more culturally acceptable and overt than in most western countries where they are legal.

            So there it is, to repeat my original point, a cultural gap with itself.

      • Insomnicide

        I don’t think it’s a Chinese thing, it’s a women thing. Even the most promiscuous of women won’t hesitate to call another a ‘slut’ or ‘bimbo’.

      • Dr Sun

        I take it you are one these “grandfathers” and you can post pic and video evidence of you with these girls to support what you are saying ?

    • Kai

      Hah, hah dude, it’s hella easy to find a girl without a boyfriend in high school and college. You’re just not usually interested in being her boyfriend!

  • mr.wiener

    Welcome to life guys, enjoy it before reality sets in.

    • Insomnicide

      End of highschool and before the start of university was the best life of my life too.

      • Zappa Frank

        than just one summer?

        • noodles76

          Maybe he’s had a rough time at that whole…life thing.

      • you must not being doing well then….

  • Aaron Wytze

    Being in a relationship means you’ve slipped up, and are wasting time not studying. For their classmates that are relationship-less until university, they have more time to cram in X amount of textbook material into their head in preparation for the Gaokao. When doing better on your test means the difference between going to a university in Shanghai or in Jiangxi, you better believe parents are going to encourage them not to be in a relationship. I sadly, sympathize with the parents, and would probably also encourage my son or daughter not to have a relationship.

    • Insomnicide

      This is true even in western countries more relaxed educations. The amount of time teenagers spend dating, partying and participating in special social activities means less time to study, prepare and choose their paths in life. Weather they land in a good university or not depends on how well they’ve managed their time and how much they’ve disciplined themselves.

      • Zappa Frank

        that is also a way to improve, selfmanagening

        • David

          teenage years are a time when we are supposed to mature and learn to control ourselves. Learning how to spend money responsibly does not mean always being poor, it means sometimes having money and learning to save/spend intelligently. As an adult you will be in relationships and to have had no practical experience in it from your teenage years (being able to handle all of the emotional ups and downs that comes with it) does not bode well for your first love.

    • lacompacida

      Life is not just studying and making money. But if that’s all you expect from life, my sympathies.

  • Insomnicide

    Cynically maybe, but the netizens are right. They’ll have the best time of their life, going out on dates, hiking in the woods, cross-country trips or even going on international vacations. And then when their test results come back and their university offers are at the door, their world will come crashing down.

    • Zappa Frank

      are you assuming they are going to get bad results?

      • Insomnicide

        A lot of them, yeah.

        • ClausRasmussen

          You don’t get bad results from having a girlfriend in my opinion (and experience). You get bad results from chasing a girlfriend.

          • Zappa Frank

            i’ve always performed worse without a girlfriend because i was just focused in chasing girls

          • Insomnicide

            Well if you’re stuck with a bad girlfriend….say goodbye to your studies.

          • Zappa Frank

            you should not stay with a bad gf regardless of your studies.. but when you get a bad gf you have experience to recognize how is to stay with her, if you do not have this experience you may even marry a bad wife..that is worse than anything concerned with your school results

  • pink panda

    How nice to be young!

  • Stefan

    My Chinese Malaysian mother have made it very clear to me that I can’t have girlfriend until I’ve finished university with a masters degree. She says when I’m young what’s most important is studying and building a future. Having a girlfriend is not important, she says.

    So during my whole childhood I didn’t even think of talking to girls or going out. I was a super nerd during my teens and my mom was happy over my good grades.

    But eventually I got myself a girlfriend and I have kept my current girlfriend secret for two years and I plan to keep it secret for another two years. My girlfriend is Chinese and also keeps it secret from her parents that she has a boyfriend.

    • David

      Well since you seem to be a participant in this sort of thing I would like to hear your opinion on the article. BTW at what point do you stop letting mom control your life and take responsibiliti for your actions )i.e. be honest about the situation and suffer the consequences?). What do yo plan on doing when you have children of your own?

      • Stefan

        I like it that they’re showing their love to others. Love shouldn’t be forbidden. I think it’s a generation gap between elder and younger Asians. Generally Asia lags 50 years behind the west in terms of social progress. In my opinion you can combine both having a partner and studying. You are only young once and enjoy it while it’s still possible.

        I will stop my mom controlling my life when financially independent. When I have children of my own then I will do it the western way but still being tough so that they become decent down to earth human beings. They will have freedom to almost do what they want but I’ll teach them the consequences and how to make wise decisions. They must learn the value of money and to follow the rules and law. They must learn the consequences of having a baby and to use contraceptives if they need.

        • noodles76

          50 years behind? No….it wasn’t like this 50 years ago in the U.S. anyway. In fact, 50 years ago, It’s likely that more ‘high school sweethearts’ ended up married after high school as opposed to now.

          Anyway, I liked your second paragraph. Agree with you.

        • vincent_t

          I am a Chinese Malaysian myself. Honestly, the Malaysian way (or by large the Asia) of education system is pretty tough on the kids. This is based on what i went through, I need to study hard to get the score to enroll into university, and I need to study even harder to get best score to secure a study loan, so that I don’t have to rely on my family for the tuition fee (my family won’t be able to afford it anyway). It is easier for people to sneer that oh these kids are nerds and spoon fed and without the ability of critical thinking, but it is what it is, I was born in that system, I have no choice but to survive the system.

          And for the puppy love thing, I’d understand where your mother comes from. My experience is that, it does affect the focus of the kids, at least for kids studying in these type of root learning system like me. I been there, done that, and so did quite some of my friends. It did affect my study when i was “crazily in love” with my 1st and 2nd gf, and i had a terrible result for the 1st 2 breakups in my life. The lucky thing is that, it happened way before I have to sit in for the equivalent Gaokao and I managed to pull myself together and catch up eventually.

          Stopping the kids from going into a puppy love relationship is the easiest way out for the parents here. Make no mistake, I never agree with that, but likewise I never agree with those who think that puppy love doesn’t impact the study of the students. This is basically just uncouth and bogus. Even the adult changes when they fall in or out of love, relationship does affect the productivity.

          • Zappa Frank

            but since to be in love is not something you decide, what’s the difference? you feel in love for someone but you cannot have a relation.. you are still struggling and thinking about it, what’s the difference in making it forbidden? isn’t in both case allowed or not a distraction from studies?

    • davilin

      I always say to my chinese friends, that the biggest problem of chinese society is not crazy studying for gaokao, obsessión with wedding and having children, etc. It’s 孝. The day most of you start doing whatever you want without hiding it and have the courage to speak up to your parents, that’ll be the real change.

      • Stefan

        One thing that’s so heavily ingrained into Asian culture is the respect for our parents. If we don’t listen to our parents then our parents will just be very angry and punish us such as hitting us and if it’s very serious kick us out of the family saying “you’re not my son / daughter anymore “. My mom got literally kicked out on the street with no home when she didn’t want to give her salary to her father. At that time she was in her early 20s. Asian parents espect their kids to “pay back” all the money the parents have spent on them since they were born.

        • davilin

          I know, conflicts with parents happens not only in China. But in China hitting and kicking is higher than average. My parents are very good, never had any problem with them. But i have a very good friend (not chinese) that got kicked out because she had a relationship with an older man. The difference between China and here is that she told his father to fuck off. Kicking someone out is what assholes do, not responsible parents.

        • Zappa Frank

          Stefan i’m a bit confused, you have also a finland father, what does he say about all this?

        • lacompacida

          So respect = obey ?

        • Rick in China

          Part of growing up is being able to say, to your parents, that they are wrong, or you will do what you choose to irregardless of their objection. If they choose to act like *fucking children* about that, and say “you’re out of the family!” – you should reply, something like, “I love you, I love our family. I respect your decision. I wish you could respect mine.” – and suck it up, because that’s the only way you’ll ever be able to break free of the bonds preventing *adulthood*.

          Who the fuck is afraid of their parents “hitting them” after say, 18? um.. eh?

  • Sean Van Cura

    Oh no girlfriends during high school, how terrifyingly normal

  • FYIADragoon

    Having a relationship is cool and all, but as one of the netizens commented, it’s too early to be celebrating like this. They haven’t even locked in for a college yet. Better to celebrate after the success than before it.

    Also, HOPEFULLY they have been prioritizing their grades (and future), as opposed to the relationships. One of these will ensure a bountiful future, the other will not.

    • Ryo Saeba

      They are celebrating about getting some at night. I mean let’s face it, most of these couples will be separated by the end of this year. They are merely in lust. They have no idea what love is.

    • noodles76

      They are not celebrating their exam scores. They are celebrating the fact that they do not need to hide anymore.

  • YourSupremeCommander

    Having a bf or gf in HS in China 30 years ago means you are a BAD child.

    • Mighty曹

      Or if you had long hair.

      • Teacher in China

        Boys here in Dongbei still don’t have long hair – it’s like they all come off an assembly line or something… And there are way too many girls with ridiculous tomboy awful haircuts.

        • Stefan

          How does the tomboy haircuts look like ? :)

          • Boris

            Are you into the little boy look?

          • Teacher in China

            They look awful, dude. Like someone put a bowl on their head and cut all the hair that came out from under it. And some are even worse than that. Just imagine the least flattering haircut you can think of on an already awkward teenage, pre-teen girl, and you’re close.

          • Mighty曹

            Not trying to be funny but you have the ‘tomboy’ cut in the pic.

        • Mighty曹

          And mostly greasy hair that isn’t shampooed for a week. At least a week.

    • noodles76

      As far as the admin is considered, it still does. Likely many parents too. The f’n Dark Ages weren’t this dark.

  • Mihel

    NEWSFLASH
    Having a social life and studying are not mutually exclusive.

    Seriously, humans are multitasking individuals, it’s stupid to assume you have to put aside social/sexual life to get good grades.

    • Mighty曹

      Plus, not having a girlfriend doesn’t mean ‘no sex’.

      • ESL Ninja

        Having a girlfriend doesn’t always mean ‘sex’… :(

        • Mighty曹

          Time to change girlfriends! lol

          • noodles76

            Indeed!

          • Stefan

            Having a sexless relationship with a girlfriend is a pointless to you? So the sole purpose of having a girlfriend is to obtain some sex?

          • mr.wiener

            Ahh yes, the “friend zone”. Been there, it sucked.

          • Kai

            Ser Jorah Mormont likes this.

          • Zappa Frank

            is not that you have gf for sex only, but sex is included in the package. stay with a gf without sex, well… I don’t know..

          • Mighty曹

            Not at all. I’m just saying ‘sex’ should be an integral part of a relationship. Sex=Intimacy=Love. Of course this formula is hard to grasp for a virgin like you.

          • Boris

            Either that, or she must really be worth the wait. There are those who do choose to stay chaste until their wedding nights. Few, and even fewer guys out there like that. In the end it is choice.

          • Mighty曹

            I used to have that mindset of ‘saving it for the right one’. lol

          • Boris

            Some people have that mindset and you have to respect their dedication to it. It’s not easy.

            But you choose a GF or BF like that, then you have to accept that or get don’t get into a relationship with such a person in the first place.

        • Zappa Frank

          unless you are under 15 yo it means also sex…

    • lacompacida

      Not mutually exclusive ? In a country where people can’t walk and chew gum at the same time, or can’t have democracy and economic growth at the same time ?

  • Mighty曹

    I’m impressed. Maintaining a ‘secret’ relationship and passing the Gaokao is no easy task. Let’s just hope the girls don’t get pregnant and end up dropping out of college.

  • noodles76

    A kid my wife teaches is 15 years old. He has a GF in school. They tried to keep it a secret. I did not understand why. The school found out…they called the parents of these kids and tried telling them how bad it was, that they were not acting appropriately, that they would end up in a bad way. My mind bled out my ears a little.

    • Mighty曹

      And what year was this? LOL Damn, these people should fast forward at least 30 years.

      • noodles76

        Yeah no shit. The parents were cool though. They all pretty much told their kids….we don’t give a crap, just don’t fuck up. If I could high-five the parents I would. I found it hard to believe that teachers can act like that…call the parents into school because little Joey and little Melissa have a relationship. We arent talking PDA either…they have not even kissed yet…it’s just playing pretend really.

        • Mighty曹

          Kissing in public is still takes extreme courage to do.

  • rollin wit 9’s

    …because letting this slip out before gaokao would have meant total abandonment by one’s peers. They might have even failed GK due to the resulting stress and trauma.
    …Christ!

  • Why are they talking about abortions??

    • Dax

      Because that’s where babies come from, right? You like a girl and you hold her hand and then the Party issues you a baby and a pair of split pants. I’m pretty sure that’s how it works in China.

    • Zappa Frank

      no sex education where else could lead..?

      • come on…. they’re smart . It’s not like the 60s

        • Zappa Frank

          in china is not very different from ’60s, maybe (but i doubt) in shanghai is not like this, but in the rest of china is probably even worse than ’60s… where the sex is tabu informations for young people are none.
          Besides, as noodle76s said somewhere, i’ve also noticed a certain nonchalance in dealing with abortion, without any guilty. But, even without being chirstian, i’m not sure is a good thing..

          • wow…I thought older people was just being dramatic. I was aware of abortions though, and I approve their attitude towards it

          • Zappa Frank

            i do not know if you understood the way many deal with abortion in china, they get even 3 abortion after they stop just because they think it may harm their reproductive system.. but apparently is barely more than a late anti contracetive… I am not a christian, but still i do not understand how can someone take this so lightly, as the fetus is just garbage. I’m not against abortion, but i think is something to do with responsibility, something that at least in the people and the situations i knew, was more or less absent.

          • those are extreme cases. No one thinks it’s gonna be fun.

    • Kai

      It’s a roundabout way of joking that these kids are going to have sex tonight after getting their gaokao over with, and a lot of them are going to end up pregnant.

  • Teacher in China

    I used to work at an international curriculum school with all Chinese students. And man, I think half the reason they came to our school was to chase boys/girls. The amount of BFs and GFs was high, even compared to my high school. One pair was even caught in a classroom at night, mostly naked, just about to get it on (or just finishing…). Never ever would have had the balls to try that in my youth…

    • noodles76

      That’s the thing though. An International School (some of them anyway) are very different from public schools. Though I’m sure even an Int’l school would inform the parents about what they saw those 2 kids doing, the kids would not be shunned, picked on, ostracized, or otherwise abused by the teachers. Kids in public schools are not usually as fortunate. The teachers are all up in what the kids are doing on their personal time when it’s none of their damn business.

      • Teacher in China

        Yeah I agree with that. The Chinese teachers at my old school were funny. They tried to be very open-minded about it, but it was always through clenched teeth. But it was interesting to see because I think that aspect was what most students cared about the most: forget about having a foreign teacher, forget about being able to study abroad more easily – I can have a boyfriend/girlfriend!!!

  • Boris

    Someone who has clearly not been in China making a comment about China and the so called Alpha-male. What did you get that shit from? Kung Fu movies?

  • Zappa Frank

    I think you have some points, but aren’t we go too far from teenagers loves?

  • Alphy

    Hmmm… have you worked with any Chinese companies? They are a lot more top down, and the boss a lot more bull-headed then those in the States, and you see that especially in male. You will see the same top down decision making in most Chinese organization, if you don’t call that Alpha male culture I don’t know what is.

    • noodles76

      Holy balls…I agree with Stefan again. That’s twice in one week. And I was ready to say miracles don’t exist!

      • Alphy

        What? Who’s Stefan?

        • noodles76

          haha. Now the world is back in it’s rightful order.
          Sorry dude, dunno why but for some reason, I thought Stefan wrote what you did. Sorry.

          So…I agree with you.

          • Mihel

            Funnily enough I experienced the same thing, sometimes I thought I was reading Stefan comments and then realised it was Alphy.
            Strange!

          • Kai

            I think it’s cuz their profile photos look a bit similar.

          • Mighty曹

            Must be the shades.

    • Insomnicide

      Alpha male culture is hanging out with your frat jock brodudes, and going out to bars and clubs to get so drunk you can’t see straight. Then trying to pick up women by throwing aggressively sexual lines at them, if that doesn’t work, you go take advantage of chicks already drunk and barely conscious. The next morning you brag about how much of a ‘pussy slayer’ you are then proceed to rub it in everyone’s face while mocking others for being nerds and enjoying reading books.

      • Alphy

        That’s just being a stupid douchebag it has nothing to do with being Alpha. Being an Alpha means you have status and get preferential treatment from within a social group. You don’t need to throw sexual lines at girls, they throw themselves at you. You get the respect and decision deference of your group and they follow your instruction without asking 20 questions.

        • Zappa Frank

          although is true that alpha is what you say still at the same is true what insomnicide said about the behave of hanging out and the attempt to become an alpha among their group in many western countries. Alpha do not do necessary all things Insomnicide said, but the people willing to be an alpha do, trying to look cool, outgoing, and so on.. of course most of times this is exactly the opposite of what they should do, but especially among youngster it works sometimes, and they may feel cool for a short while..

        • Insomnicide

          Being alpha has nothing to do with top down company structures. In fact, in western countries they have the exact same structure. Talk back to your boss and you’ll get an earful, same as in China or Japan or any other Asian country that people think are different.

          Just because Google or Facebook have a relaxed social atomsphere, doesn’t mean that’s how all companies are run. Unfortunately it’s the exact same in America, in Britain, Australia, France, etc. etc.

          A top down business hierachy has absolutely nothing to do with being alpha male or not. The boss could be female and still get the same system.

          My post is about what IS alpha male culture. And as far as I know, that’s not what they do in the office.

  • Zen my Ass

    Good job, guys. Now, get married, have a baby and start paying a mortgage before it’s too late.

  • lacompacida

    Let the kids be kids. Let’s not deprive them the opportunity to enjoy youth. Young means you can be foolish and learn from the experience. By the time they are really grown up, they will not be foolish and be happy about it. Stay young. Stay foolish, as long as you can.

  • noodles76

    You are completely and entirely full of shit.

    The only thing you said that I can agree with is that sometimes the message one sends is not always the message received.

    The rest of your post, sucks donkey balls.

  • Zappa Frank

    no articles about the world’s cup?

    • Rick in China

      “Fifa rapes another country, transforms laws, pays no taxes in any way whatsoever, and leaves with all the money – Brazil proud to be able to kick a ball in their own country – Chinese reactions below:

      中国打球是骗子”

      Done.

      • Zappa Frank

        I was thinking something more light like “who is going to win the world’s cup” or “Japanese devil referee favorite Brazil…”
        But in particular, Italy vs England, style 5 – 0

        • ninxay

          Both teams look like they’re a bunch of upper-crust schoolboys on some expensive field trip.
          For this non-football-fan, which one is England and which is Italy?

          • Mihel

            You could tell them apart easily just for the way they present themselves: neatly lined up with immaculate suits vs. a flock of sheep that look like they slept into their suits.

          • Zappa Frank

            Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!! Blasphemy…….!!!!!!!!! Vade retro!!! Away from me….

    • ex-expat

      I think it will be interesting to see what happens with the (2022?) winter olympics. Beijing may win just because no one else really wants to have them, for many of the same reasons why some in Brazil are upset about hosting the world cup.

      • Zappa Frank

        sports events are getting more and more inconvenient.. to host those kinds of events means a huge cost and almost no real benefit.. if we add corruption..

        • ex-expat

          Exactly. Especially since Russia spent so much on Sochi, it really has people reevaluating. Though China would love to host it just for face, many other countries have progressed beyond that.

  • kindbails

    Academic success determines neither happiness nor success in life

    • commander

      Academic success reveals one’s hard-working, diligent nature.

      Academic failure can’t become the ground to undercut the academic achievement.

      Academic failure may influence happiness and success in life.

  • Kai

    I like your last paragraph.

    The first two, I think you’re idealizing one and demonizing the other unfairly. There’s a difference between how Chinese want to see themselves and their cultural ideals vs. what actually is. Same with Americans.

  • WangDN

    Hahaha, I have lived here in China for a number of years, I’ve
    worked in public schools, most of my friends are Chinese and I study here. The only “framework” I have for thinking about the Chinese, is the one that is presented by Chinese culture, people and society itself.

    And say what you want, but the fact is EVERY school in China
    has a no relationship policy for its students. Don’t believe me!? There are a good amount of teachers that use Chinasmack, if you are one, or know one, ask them to ask their school what the policy is on students having relationships and they will tell you that it is forbidden. A Chinese friend of mine is a student at a
    university here and he tells me that even his university has a “no
    relationships on campus” policy (but of course few, if anyone, follow the rules on that).

    Young love is demonised in China, kids are constantly told that it is bad for them, has a negative effect on their studies etc. Indeed, this article itself is evidence that young people in relationships is considered taboo here. If it was considered normal, then there
    would be no article about it. Do you think in Europe you would find an article, with numerous comments, of photos of young people in relationships!? No, because that is considered normal
    and even mundane in Europe, and people are not all that interested in the mundane. The fact that this article exists and has so many comments shows that its subject matter must be out of the ordinary.

    Of course LOADS of young people in China have relationships! But they have relationships, INSPITE of society’s attitudes and rules towards it, not because society deems it acceptable. Indeed, many of my students have relationships, and tell me about it. But they also say they tell me because I am the foreign teacher, and they wouldn’t dare tell their Chinese teachers because it’s against the rules. And they wouldn’t dream of telling their parents.

    Lastly, war and violence is glorified here. And hatred toward the Japanese is taught in schools. My students have told me that their political and moral education teacher has told them specifically that watching romantic films is bad for them, because it will encourage them to look for a boyfriend/girlfriend when the should be focusing on their studies. But I asked them if they were warned not to watch violent films and they said no, indeed they told me they had been shown a veryviolent film about the rape of Nanjing in the class! My girlfriend (Chinese) tells me that when she was in primary school her teacher showed the class a very graphic film about the Japanese torturing Chinese people during the war. She said thather and all her friends (young children) were scared and traumatized by it.

  • Dr Sun

    Good for them.

  • Kai

    It’s not bullshit; it’s all about everything in moderation. There should be respect but there shouldn’t be blind obedience. If you can’t even learn when to listen to your parents and when not to, you won’t learn when to listen to other people and when not to.

  • Zappa Frank

    chengdu, i’ve been with wife, didi and friends in place that looke a bit trashy, but apparently was famous, for 西昌bbq.. they even have belgium beer (dunkel and waisse), half liter for 28 yuan only..

  • Mighty曹

    Yeah, that’s what I always thought.

  • Mighty曹

    to be worn for a night or two.

  • Boris

    I’m sorry, did I hit a nerve?

    You don’t have to be in China for 100+ years to know what was posted is full of bull. Shit take straight out of Kung Fu movies and trying to present it as reality.

  • wufansdick

    Wait, why isn’t it okay to hold hands?

  • ASDF

    And when they graduate from universities, they’ll be unemployed unless they have connections to get into where they want to go.

  • Dr Sun

    try to read data more carefully.

  • Michael .

    Am I missing something obvious here? This is common around the world! While school and love are both worthy endeavors, there’s no reason why each can’t help to strengthen, help and improve the other. I met my wife at work. Many say that dating a coworker is a no-no, but it strengthened us and we each helped the other improve our work. People always like to focus on the negative; the glass is half empty. Heh. It’s like watching the news, you only hear about the negative and they keep dragging the same topic through the mud, but when something good happens it rarely makes headlines, and if it does its a bi-line and never mentioned again.

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