5 Chinese Attempts at Viral Music Videos Poorly Received

chinese-viral-music-holiday

Following the success of viral videos such as “Friday” by Rebecca Black, “Gangnam Style”, and “What Does The Fox Say“, many Chinese pop singers also began to cash in on this trend, often using scantily-clad women and broken English to attract views.

While many Western viral videos often became popular due to their combination of humor and outrageousness, Chinese viral videos were met by general disgust, leading many netizens to question people’s values in a society where music videos glorified themes such as mistresses, money, and sex.

Holiday – Huang Rong

INTRO: Everybody, it’s holiday today. Are you ready?
Everybody are you ready? PARTY PARTY.
Everybody let’s go party, it’s holiday holiday,
Let’s go to party.
DAY DAY Y DAY YI DAY DAY

today 又是 [is another] Saturday ,
我们 [we] can go party on 网 [line] 卡拉 ok [Karaoke].
Teacher teacher 常常 [always] say,
good good study, day day up.

那些 [Those are] no 是today的thing,
Give me one 矿泉 [mineral] water,
我不会[We won’t] no three no four.

我有 [We have] so clever 脑袋一个 [a brain],
一起 [together] play, 一起 [together] two.
我们两个 [the two of us] who 跟 who,
给这世界一点 [Show this world some] colour see see.

我好想 [I want] day day 都是 [to be] holiday,
Where good where cool 我们 [we] where stay.
NO work NO learn, Love谁谁 [whoever],
Crazy crazy ok ok.

我好想 [I want] day day都是 [to all be] holiday,
I’m good? I’m bad ?I’m sorry.
NO 心 [heart] NO 肺 [lungs], let me free,
Give Me give me DAY DAY YI DAY YI DAY DAY
DAY DAY YI DAY YI DAY DAY

today 又是 [is another] Saturday,
我们 [we] can go party on 网 [line] 卡拉 ok [Karaoke].
Teacher teacher 常常 [always] say,
good good study, day day up.

那些 [Those are] no 是today的thing,
Give me one 矿泉 [mineral] water.
我不会[We won’t] no three no four.

我有 [We have] so clever 脑袋一个 [a brain],
一起 [together] play, 一起 [together] two.
我们两个 [the two of us] who 跟 who,
给这世界一点 [Show this world some] colour see see.

我好想 [I want] day day 都是 [to be] holiday,
Where good where cool 我们 [we] where stay.
NO work NO learn, Love谁谁 [whoever],
Crazy crazy ok ok.

我好想 [I want] day day 都是 [to be] holiday,
Where good where cool 我们 [we] where stay.
NO work NO learn, Love谁谁 [whoever],
Crazy crazy ok ok.

I’m good? I’m bad ?I’m sorry,
NO 心 [heart] NO 肺 [lungs], let me free.
Give Me give me DAY DAY YI DAY YI DAY DAY
DAY DAY YI DAY YI DAY DAY

DAY DAY YI DAY YI DAY DAY party party
DAY DAY YI DAY YI DAY DAY
DAY DAY YI DAY YI DAY DAY
Holiday!

Comments on Youku:

nyj799:

Really hate Chinese mixed with English.

kama2300:

Foreigners can’t understand this, Chinese aunties can’t comprehend this, this is our generation’s language: Chinglish.

__假不正经女士:

Trash music! This is just a promotional video for an underwear advertisement~

花露水2010:

Fuck”? [the word “day” and “fuck” in Chinese are homonyms]

-钟琦- :

So they can have Gangnam Style bt we can’t have Holiday?

hgudkcud:

The dance is very innovative, wouldn’t it be great if they weren’t wearing underwear?

爱尔兰玄彬:

These kind of lyrics truly will teach young people the wrong things. I hope more public figures especially celebrities will do more things that positively benefit the upbringing of young people, rather than lifting one’s skirt to show others, hoping everyday is a holiday, neither working nor learning, such a worthless lifestyle! Do they think young people today are not listless enough already? Is there no one to control the distribution of lyrics [songs] like this?

Gigolo – Xie Rong’er

MAN: I wasn’t after your wealth and fortune.
You didn’t care if I was poor.
We just wanted a simple love.
Not caring what hardship we’d have to endure.

WOMAN: I didn’t think you would cheat on me.
More shameless than a mistress, living off a woman.
I used silence to accept your crimes.
I can only blame myself for picking you, I was blind.

MAN: I’ve finally become someone’s gigolo,
Spend everyday with a rich woman, eating and playing.
So many years of love abruptly ends,
How should someone as lovesick as you cope.

WOMAN: You’ve finally become someone’s gigolo,
Just how much is dignity really worth?
No choice for me but to shed tears,
TOGETHER: There’s nothing more to blame, goodbye.

WOMAN: I wasn’t after your wealth and fortune.
Not did I care that you were poor.
We only wanted a simple love.
Not caring what hardship we’d have to endure.

MAN: But reality defeated the promise of love.
Your walking away in silence was betrayal.
In numb silence I can only look up at the sky.
I can only blame that I am a loser.

WOMAN: You’ve finally become someone’s gigolo.
Spend everyday with a rich woman, eating and playing.
So many years of love abruptly ends.
How should someone as lovesick as you cope.

MAN: I’ve finally become someone’s gigolo.
Just how much is dignity really worth?
Our original dreams tossed aside.
TOGETHER: There’s nothing more to blame.

WOMAN: You’ve finally become someone’s gigolo.
Spend everyday with a rich woman, eating and playing.
So many years of love abruptly ends.
How should someone as lovesick as you cope.

MAN: I’ve finally become someone’s gigolo.
Just how much is dignity really worth?
Our original dreams tossed aside.
TOGETHER: There’s nothing more to blame, goodbye.

Comments on Youku:

nnkun:

Really good, as controversial as Lady Gaga, the quality of a Thai MV, the choreography of Chinese villagers. I can only hope for more…

speed1231:

If all Chinese music is like this, then I will never listen to Chinese music again…

帕特里西亚姐姐:

Oh my god…I can’t believe I actually finished watching this…

fuck哟切克闹:

I agree, some Chinese songs and MVs, whether it is music creation or lyrical meaning, are all simply garbage. There are no works with meaning. Strongly despise this.

李煜琰律师:

Society has progressed, different values are now allowed to exist, hahaha! Even SARFT tolerated this?

伪阿卡林之波尔加P:

Totally dumbfounded, domestically produced songs continue to reach new lows. If this is mainland China’s pop culture, then this culture might as well just die.

Diva – Ai Dai

wu la la la way too cute
wu lalala wake you
wu lalala way too cute
wu lalala wake you……

还没回答 还没回答 [Answer me, answer me] How can i fill my dream,
还没回答 还没回答 怎么看见不回 [Answer me, answer me. Why are you ignoring me].
Call me Rita call me Rita , I know a little swing,
Call me Rita call me Rita , She’s lady of quality.

H HERMèS She’s got a bed of Birkin bag,
M Maserati She leaves it down at garage.
F Firenze Her properties are in Italy,
M Memoirs She writes autobiography.

No way 这位 [this] Lady She’s got everything,
要问 这位女生 说话要 [Ask this girl, when she talks she] keep it straight.
Oh乖 难怪你拽 越拽越惹人爱 [Oh good, no wonder you are swinging, the more you swing the more people will love you],
No way 这位 [this] lady So nice to meet you here.

L.V party,she’s the No.1 guest, last one came,
Lorren 和 [and] Meggie, being very gossipy(but who cares?).
No matter where you see, she’s always followed by paparazzi,
Tomorrow China Daily, says her company is on Lombard street.

No way 这位 [this] Lady She’s got everything,
要问 这位女生 说话要 [Ask this girl, when she talks she] keep it straight.
Oh乖 难怪你拽 越拽越惹人爱 [Oh good, no wonder you are swinging, the more you swing the more people will love you],
No way 这位 [this] lady so nice to meet you here.

wu la la la way too cute
wu lalala wake you
wu lalala way too cute
wu lalala wake you….

还没回答 还没回答 [Answer me, answer me] How can I fill my dream,
还没回答 还没回答 怎么看见不回 [Answer me, answer me. Why are you ignoring me].
Call me Rita call me Rita , I know a little swing,
Call me Rita call me Rita , She’s a lady of quality.

H HERMèS She’s got a bed of Birkin bag,
M Maserati She leaves it down at garage
F Firenze Her properties are in Italy
M memoirs She writes autobiography.

No way 这位 [this] Lady She’s got everything,
要问 这位女生 说话要 [Ask this girl, when she talks she] keep it straight.
Oh乖 难怪你拽 越拽越惹人爱 [Oh good, no wonder you are swinging, the more you swing the more people will love you],
No way 这位 [this] lady so nice to meet you here.

Let me hear you now Say wu lalala way too loud,
没你不热闹 [It’s no fun without you] Oh wake up wake up, shall we?
说话有腔调 即使听不清也有味道 [Speak with an accent, even if its hard to understand, we still have class],
你唱什么 谁动了我的高脚杯 [What are you singing about, who touched my cocktail].

Let me hear you now Say wu lalala way too loud,
没你不热闹 [It’s no fun without you] Oh wake up wake up,shall we?
说话有腔调 即使听不清也有味道 [Speak with an accent, even if its hard to understand, we still have class],
你唱什么 谁动了我的高脚杯 [What are you singing about, who touched my cocktail].

wu la la la way too cute
wu lalala wake you
wu lalala way too cute
wu lalala wake you….

Comments on Youku:

沈怀志:

I didn’t understand a single word.

当当迷:

Korean KPOP are just mass produced trash songs, yet you go and learn from them… This melody, these lyrics… and that meaningless English. It is a good thing to learn from abroad but you should at least research the best way to absorb outside content to create your own. This song feels like it is purely intended for making quick money.

ぁ小宝お乖乖ぁ:

Do they want to compete with Huang Rong’s “Holiday”?

正在-输-入:

Must they add a few lines of a foreign language to show that they are trendy?

糖醋排骨哥:

Another Lady Gaga wannabe?

I’m Not Going to Be Your Concubine – Xie Rong’er

You always lie about being busy with work, you met Mr. Wang then Mr. Zhang.
Your love is absurd, it drives me mad.
You should sweeten your love, I can’t stand your lies.
You heart is disloyal, when you see beautiful women you become a playboy.

You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
Do not play around with me.
You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
I will not be fooled by you.

You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
You should stop being a playboy.
You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
You should stop daydreaming.

You always lie about being busy with work, you met Mr. Wang then Mr. Zhang.
Your love is absurd, it drives me mad.
You should sweeten your love, I can’t stand your lies.
You heart is disloyal, when you see beautiful women you become a playboy.

You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
Do not play around with me.
You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
I will not be fooled by you.

You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
You should stop being a playboy.
You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
You should stop daydreaming.

You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
Do not play around with me.
You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
I will not be fooled by you.

You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
You should stop being a playboy.
You are not my emperor and I not going to be your concubine.
You should stop daydreaming.

Comments on Youku:

丶邪爵:

Chinese music videos have “progressed” to this level now?

宝宝早:

Brothers, let’s upvote this to the front page, and let more people know that Chinese MV is only this level.

陌白森:

Eunuchs can have sex???

爆炸文:

Very realistic, very lewd, it will definitely have high views. Haha, but shes not revealing enough and the girl’s body is not very good.

GismoYAO:

The song using such shallow lyrics, this MV (I’m calling it a MV to avoid cursing) is so vulgar. it is these people who are slowly destroying China’s culture!

作安安安安:

Fuck, this is why Chinese pop music is falling further and further behind others by the day. It is because of shit like this. This singer is a disgrace to the music world.

What Does The Fox Say? – Gong Yuefei

Comments on Youku:

xujun501:

So vulgar, what is the difference between this and stripping?

yeah青春依旧:

This MV can be compared to AV [Adult Video]…

祝萌女王bb:

What the fuck, talk about destroying/ruining this song. That Norwegian group’s version was just great, but was your English taught by a language teacher? Your pronunciation is this awful and you still dare to sing [in English]? Are you from Dongguan?

狂风一夜:

If this was North Korea, this would result in execution.

7707107:

How can you be shameless to this level! You are more disgusting than even Gan Lulu, fuck.

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  • bujiebuke

    Everyone,

    Don’t click play on any of the videos. Learn from my mistake.

    • LOL

    • Germandude

      OMG, I did it despite your warning…. I just watched parts of the Fox song and I started slamming my head against the wall. Was I stoned, I would feel entertained, now I just feel empty…

      DO NOT PLAY THIS VIDEO!

      • bujiebuke

        You have paid the price for your foolish transgression.

      • filabusta

        I don’t think getting stoned would even help.

        • Germandude

          It would certainly eaze the pain.

      • Washington Bullets

        That video nearly killed me.

    • Eurotrash

      I was considering, but am heeding your warning.

      • Kai

        NOE! JOIN USSS!!!

    • DavidisDawei

      That last video was OK (watched with sound muted).

    • donscarletti

      I played them on all on mute and the first, last and “Diva” would all be good enough for a wank, if there was no other material available.

    • fibblesquibble

      Will it really disturb my well being? Cant i even watch a teeny weeny little bit? Pleath?

    • 950619

      its too late for me :(

  • mr.wiener

    Soft power and pop culture cannot be done by the numbers…having said that “What does the fox say” is unintentionally hilarious

    • slob

      Doe goo swoof
      Ka goo smeow
      Bird goo street an mao su kweek

      Cow go smoo
      Four goos cock (I think she actually knew this word)
      And elephan go shoo

      Door ku kwaik
      Amigugwuaii (??)
      And sea goo aye aye aye

      Butder wa szoun
      Zat noo one nooooo

      “What does the fox see?”

      dignidnidngindignidngidngingidnigdningdindgin

      “What Ze four say”

      And it just gets better as it goes along.

      • mr.wiener

        Makes me realize how bad my Chinese must sound to Chinese ears.

        • Boris_Da_Bengal_Tiger

          Do you sing in Chinese?

          • mr.wiener

            Only when I’m drunk.

          • Southernortherner

            ha! me too..

          • DavidisDawei

            How can you not sing along…right?
            Gongxi, Gongxi, Gongxi…

          • Boris_Da_Bengal_Tiger

            By that time, everyone sounds the same.

  • Zappa Frank

    WOW.. now I really understand why Chinese people complain about the western influence in their society… those videos are so embarrassing….

    the dancers seem wooden puppets..
    seems an involuntary parody

    • whuddyasack

      Oh please don’t bash yourselves too hard over this hahaha. Rest assured this sort of tackiness is solely a Chinese production. It has very little to do with anything “western” outside of the odd Chinglish (which is arguably a derivative of Engrish).

      • Insomnicide

        The concepts are western-influenced, but yes, the tackiness and trashiness is unmistakably Chinese….

        • mountain scott

          Has the US forgotten the 80s?

        • Gordon Gogodancer

          Western as in American

  • Free Man

    Same shit, different side of the planet. There was, is and always will be differences in taste of music between people. Not that I like this, didnt bother watching, just read the comments.

    Must be a boring day again, if this is a “hot” topic…

    • Germandude

      Yeah, a lot of crap from the music and video industry in the west as well, no doubt.

      But you are absolutely correct: THIS is the hottest topic in China? After that celibrity affair? At least that’s what cS suggests by publishing those.
      No hotter topics than this at the moment? How boring.

      • Kai

        Nah I think it’s still the Wen Zhang scandal. I wouldn’t say this is the hottest topic in China but like many other posts on cS it qualifies as reflecting a notable pop culture phenomenon.

        I honestly think people should subjugate themselves to at least a minute of each music video to truly appreciate how cringeworthy these are. It’ll toughen you up. :)

        That said, my first reaction to joe on gchat was how soul-sucking and genuinely depressing it was to watch these. I didn’t get through any if them but I’d like to think it made me stronger that I’m still alive.

        • Germandude

          Just for clarification: You mean to say that the Wen Zhang scandal is currently the hottest topic discussed on the Chinese interwebs?
          Not that I want to complain but I can hardly imagine the whatabouts of some actor is dominating the discussion of an entire nation? Or are the priorities set so that other stuff falls through the radar?

          • Guang Xiang

            If anything, I just asked a coworker what’s the hottest topic and it’s Wen Zhang and Ma li

          • Germandude

            Well thanks for the info, but that’s just sad if you ask me…

          • Free Man

            They still have to make up 50 years worth of celebrity gossip, because they missed out during the time when everybody was wearing the same color and style and everybody called each other comrade and the only celebrity was Mao and nobody dared gossiping about him.

          • Kai

            Try not to feel so strongly about it, because otherwise you’ll just be sad when it comes to every country. It’s just human nature. For example, the music videos on this post made me really sad but I reminded myself its not the end all and be all of Chinese music or pop culture.

            Then I went to browse my favorite car forum.

          • wnsk

            I think you misunderstand Germandude. When he says it’s “sad,” what he really means is, “so pathetic it’s laughable.”

          • Kai

            I want to say my response would be the same/similar. Personally, these music videos crossed beyond “so pathetic it’s laughable” and into “so pathetic, it’s utterly demoralizing”. I can be as judgmental as everyone else; I just try to back away from the edge and remember the big picture. Without it, I’d probably resort to cutting and heavy eyeliner.

          • wnsk

            But why is it demoralising? Because it reflects badly on you, as a Chinese person?

            Like you implied, every country has its fair share of trashy music/singers. If these videos were the best Chinese music had to offer, or even just the average, then yeah I guess it’s pretty demoralising. But…they’re not. (They’re not, right?) I think it can certainly get much worse than this, hah.

            Seems to me like you’re the one feeling strongly about this, despite yourself.

          • Insomnicide

            It’s demoralising because these videos are uploaded onto YouTube as well. Like someone said “丢脸都丢到国外去了“

          • Kai

            Oh, I clearly do feel strongly about this. Lamenting about it pretty much proves how desperately I want to disassociate from it, to disown it, to say “this is not me!”

            Me trying to manage how strongly OTHERS feel about it is therefore also a way to manage how I feel about it. We’re social creatures and we can’t help being affected by others so we influence each other to manage our coexistence.

            Even if I know LOGICALLY that this doesn’t really reflect on me simply because of shared/associated identities, I’m as weak as pretty much everyone else when it comes to feeling threatened by such associations.

          • wnsk

            …i don’t mean to laugh at you, but something about this is pretty funny. Big Bang Theory could totally plot this into one of their episodes or something.

          • Kai

            You mean Raj?

          • wnsk

            …haha, that could work. or maybe Sheldon. something about this just screams, “NEUROTIC.” in the sense that you KNOW it’s not rational, but you think/feel/do it anyway.

          • Kai

            Heh, if you want to be uncharitable, yeah, you could characterize it as “neurotic”. I prefer to think of it as simply being honest about an insecurity shared by most people, if not all. No point not owning up to it.

            For example, as an American, I’m pretty self-conscious about how “Americans” are perceived and judged by others. It’s not so much what the perceptions and judgements are but how unfairly they might be applied.

            BTW, there’s actually a bit of a misreading on my part here. I thought Germandude was saying these music videos were “sad” when he was actually saying it’s sad that the Wen Zhang scandal was so widely talked about (in response to Guang Xiang). Granted, he probably thinks these music videos are sad too, but I still want to acknowledge the record.

          • wnsk

            …I get the sense that Asian Americans are more insecure than other Asians. For instance, the Taiwanese, Hongkongers, and other Chinese elsewhere probably wouldn’t feel as embarrassed by these Mainland-produced videos. It seems strange that an American Chinese would feel this way…but apparently they/you do, and I suppose there’s nothing very wrong in it, but…shrug off that insecurity, man; that #cancelcolbert thing is stupid! :P

          • Kai

            I think it has something to do with America’s history of race-relations and multiculturalism. Quite a few Europeans have been befuddled by what the American public seems to be so hung up on at times.

            However, what is more proximate here is the context of this site as a meeting point between “China/Chinese” and “non-China/Chinese”. My reaction here is less like TW/HKers disassociating with mainlanders and more like TW/HKers disassociating with mainlanders in the presence of non-Chinese people, which they reliably do all the time.

            “Insecurity” is also my uncharitable characterization of my own reaction, but I felt like being hard on myself. Whether anyone wants to call it a euphemism or me actually being more accurate (or fair to myself), there’s nothing strange with an ethnic Chinese person being afraid of other ethnic Chinese people reflecting negatively on their shared identity. It’s no different from expats being embarrassed by the behavior of other expats, for example.

            In the grand scheme of things, I don’t think my “insecurity” is an outlier. I just try to be self-aware, hoping it makes me more rationale and reasonable.

            I came upon the #cancelcolbert thing after it had more or less run its course. Being familiar with Colbert, I wouldn’t have reacted like Suey Park did. There has been a lot of good commentary with poignant points about the issue. For example: http://www.quora.com/How-do-Asians-and-Asian-Americans-feel-about-this-tweet-from-The-Colbert-Reports-Twitter-account-I-am-willing-to-show-the-Asian-community-I-care-by-introducing-the-Ching-Chong-Ding-Dong-Foundation-for-Sensitivity-to-Orientals-or-Whatever

            I also watched Colbert’s response to the whole thing on his show and it was hilarious. Colbert gives me hope for humanity, especially with how he cleverly touched on so many salient points (therefore acknowledging them fairly) with such comic incisiveness. I was in awe. Some of the people who came to his “defense”? Not so much. I think that’s a fair reaction to the overall matter.

          • Germandude

            Well pretty much this. It’s comparable to all the gossip you can read about Justin Biber and the like in the west as well. I just never had the feeling that other than during the Oscars, superstars and the gossip around them would be dominating the internet and news…

          • Kai

            It has been for the past week but I think it’s finally starting to die off. Fauna provided you with specifics and metrics to confirm whether or not the Wen Zhang scandal was as big as she says it was. You don’t have to imagine, you only need to verify.

            Of course, no nation is literally dominated by a single discussion topic. As I’ve said in the Wen Zhang posts comments, tons of other things (and discussions) were happening throughout the Miley Cyrus twerking incident but it couldn’t be denied that it dominated much of the American internet/media consciousness at the time.

            You can judge China for the attention to the Wen Zhang scandal as much as you can judge America for Miley Cyrus, and in both cases, some judgements might cross over into being unfair.

            On Weibo at least, here’s the current most popular hashtag:

            http://huati.weibo.com/944226

            #暴打出轨男#
            “beat up cheating men”

          • Markus Peg

            Off topic but, If i had to choose one person to have a beer with from this site it would be you.

          • Kai

            That’s INCREDIBLY flattering, to the point where I feel somewhat uncomfortable. Thanks, I appreciate the sentiment. That said, I’d prefer vodka over beer. Less filling, more efficient at getting me out of my panties.

          • Germandude

            Lol, agreeing with Markus here.

            What I actually meant by my questioning of this topic here is: cS says it shows the most popular internet topics on its site and I felt it hard to believe that this story and the previous one about the celebrity are leading online discussions since there must be sth more pressuring to be discussed on the chinese interwebs, other than some cheating of an actor and copies of songs.

            It’s…..just so……strange?!

          • wnsk

            …is it different in Germany? (Honest question.)

            I know it’s not much different in America. (Refer to what Kai said about Miley Cyrus.)

            …although if you said the Chinese, as a race, are a more gossipy bunch than other ethnicities/nationalities, I can probably also believe that.

          • Germandude

            Honestly, I don’t know. I wouldn’t know how to measure the hottest topic by clicks received. But looking at the most popular German news sites (usually webpages of newspapers and magazines), the hottest topics are:
            politics
            politics
            politics
            politics
            economy
            economy
            economy
            foreign politics
            foreign politics
            sports
            sports
            culture

            Pretty much in that order.

          • Insomnicide

            Such ordnung.

          • Germandude

            Ze Ordnung musst bi! Sere is nou wway arrrround sis!

          • wnsk

            ah, i see. could be that Germans aren’t big producers of pop culture? in any case, since Chinese and Americans outnumber Germans, YOU GUYS ARE THE FREAKS :P

            (seriously, politics x4? that’s kind of sad too. at least one of those should be replaced by Playmobil, or Das Schwarze Auge…oops, revealing my geeky side.)

          • Germandude

            Well, eventhough its style is different than the German version, the English site of (probably) the most influencial German magazine looks like the following:

            http://www.spiegel.de/international/

          • wnsk

            Nice.

            (But if that magazine works like other magazines, then it’s seeking to make trends, rather than just taking them as they come…as ChinaSmack does. So it’s comparing apples to oranges, IF you’re comparing.)

          • Rick in China

            “Germans aren’t big producers of pop culture” – wait, what? You realise Hollywood itself was immensely influenced by German born people throughout the century, yah?

            I imagine lots of US kids listen to fairy tales, for example, and go “Man, our American fairy tales are the best!” …. *sighs* Not just hollywood by any stretch, but language, lifestyle in general, damn.. German has way more root in America than you’d imagine, mostly because it’s a country of ‘borrowed’ culture. Don’t worry, it doesn’t make it any less uber.

          • Kai

            I think he meant the country, not the ethnicity or historical culture. Like other major European countries, so much of their pop culture is imported and influenced by the American juggernaut, sometimes with some understandable resentment. America dominates pop culture worldwide not just through its reach but also its own sheer native population. China’s pop culture doesn’t have reach but it does have a huge native population, kinda like Bollywood.

          • wnsk

            Out of context?

          • winterbitten

            Germandude, do you live in China? Most of my circle are non English speakers here (though my Chinese sucks). It seems from Weixin that a lot of people have had something to say in relation to this and my gf is upset.

            Apparently the dude was held in high regards; a perfect example of all that’s right with Chinese men. I don’t think most of the population imagined he’d cheat on her and thus they feel betrayed.

            You have these videos, again forcing people to question today’s society and morals.

            There’s a TV show called China Big Brain or something. They’re doing a China vs (Foreign Country) series right now and the other day or something this Chinese kid started crying which also caused quite a bit of discussion from what my gf says. Again, netizens questioning their morals, priorities, etc.

            Can a mod comment on why I can’t ever log in with disqus? Is it blocked in CHina or am I blocked or something? I hate posting as a guest….

          • Markus Peg

            If getting out of your panties is the goal i wont stop you.
            I kind of see what Germandude means.

            I for one would be intrested to see the comments on this story “David Cameron promotes marriage equality in Weibo post, inspires China’s LGBT community” Has his weibo been flooded with comments, are the comments good and bad? what are the highest voted comments?

            Perhaps sections for politics-economy-sports-entertainment etc.. would help?…

          • Kai

            We actually do have different archives for different topics.

            http://www.chinasmack.com/tag/politics
            http://www.chinasmack.com/tag/economy

            http://www.chinasmack.com/tag/sports
            http://www.chiansmack.com/tag/celebrities (no general “entertainment” tag)

            A lot of older posts involving “politics” probably weren’t tagged since the tag was subsequently introduced into our organization system.

            However, the thing isn’t about having “sections” but the fact that cS pretty much updates just once a day and Germandude–like many others–doesn’t like it when the update of the day isn’t interesting to him personally. Hell, I keep an open mind and I still find a lot of updates personally uninteresting. What’s behind his expressions of disinterest isn’t a desire for sections but simply a desire for more content that interests him. It’s understandable.

            About David Cameron, I have no idea. I haven’t come across the story yet. Does the source where you learned about it give you a link to his Weibo post? If they do, the simplest thing would be to click over to it and see how many comments there are. It’s one of the reasons why we always link our sources, for transparency.

          • Markus Peg

            I think CS gives good insight but one post a day is not as much as many of us would like.

            This is Cameron’s Weibo http://www.weibo.com/ukprimeminister?from=profile&wvr=5&loc=infdomain

            i found the story here: http://shanghaiist.com/2014/04/04/david-cameron-lgbt-weibo-post.php

            I think that website (shanghaiist) posts many stories per day, but does not show the reaction of Chinese commenters, of course it does general news as well which CS does not need but ones with comments related to big topics and issues would be appreciated. Even if the comment section is not as big as celebrity gossip

          • Kai

            Yeah, having readers who want more is a good problem for a site to have.

            http://hot.weibo.com/daily/20140403?v=9999

            Weibo says Cameron’s post was 9th hottest of the day yesterday.

            Shanghaiist has a different format than cS does. They’re more of traditional news/gossip blog while cS has from the start always been about the Chinese internet, about translation, and about Chinese netizen reactions. They report a story, while we spend hours translating the story as it appeared on the Chinese internet as well as not only WHAT Chinese netizens said in response but HOW they said it (because how something is expressed is often as interesting as what). While they paraphrase and editorialize from their perspectives, we try to be transparent, avoid inserting our opinions, and instead focus on showing the perspectives of Chinese netizens themselves. We try to put our personal topical interests aside and let Chinese netizens decide what stories to cover.

            Ever since Shanghaiist started sourcing more stories from the Chinese internet, its traffic has surpassed ours. Their format allows them to publish content faster, and they’re putting out like 10-20 posts a day. More importantly (in terms of traffic acquisition), they’re “breaking news” and getting the initial deluge of traffic that comes with that. They’re doing a good job of what they want to do. I’ve consistently recommended Shanghaiist as a blog to follow for their far greater volume of coverage.

            cS is just different, despite what has become overlap in subject-matter. We like to think our format gives potential depth and nuance to our readers. We like to think we’re allowing people the opportunity to draw their own conclusions, to make their own connections, to realize insights on their own instead of having it spoon-fed to them. We like to think we’re “showing” instead of “telling”. Even if it is teaching people Chinese swear words. There’s a sort of hopeful idealism behind it all.

            Entertainment industry news/gossip is frequently more popular than news stories actually (not just in discussion but sheer pageviews), so much that I believe cS translators already discount those stories most of the time when trying to determine what to cover. That Wen Zhang was covered is a testament to just how big it was above and beyond normal celebrity gossip. If cS can only cover one story, I’m glad Fauna went with that. It stays true to cS’s editorial mission, her mission (though she strays at times too).

            There are tons of interesting stuff every day. David Cameron’s weibo post definitely counts as one of them (IMHO). If people want it covered the cS way, then cS needs more manpower, more contributors, who subscribe to its philosophy and have the skills and passion to realize it.

            Overall, I think cS has a good diverse mix of “serious” and “silly” content that demonstrates that China is as serious and silly as everywhere else. Like you, I’d like it if there was “more”.

            Alright, it’s the weekend, I’m off! Peace!

            EDIT: Oops, one more thing. If you’re interested in LGBT issues, try this archive: http://www.chinasmck.com/tag/homosexuality

          • Markus Peg

            Thanks for the informative reply, i hope CS gets the manpower it needs, it is very detailed and its good to read the stories it produces.

            As for Cameron’s post, i guess 9th hottest of the day is not so hot, (not enough for bigger coverage). That top ten weibo link is great thanks for that.

            PS: your Chinasmack link is missing an “a” in smack so the link wont work if clicked.

          • Kai

            Oops, fixed that.

            9th isn’t bad. The ranking isn’t that important since the 9th of one day could be the 1st of another. I’d say the raw metrics of Cameron’s post (number of comments, shares, etc.) are solid. It’s more about whether or not one of our translators decides to do it ahead of the 8 other possible topics above it that may be considered more popular.

            Here’s the most upvoted comment on his weibo post:

            二少丸-变成甜味的:再说一遍好了觉得国家允许同性结婚大家就都会去和同性结婚导致人口减少世界灭亡的人,你是弱智吗国家还允许自由恋爱呢也没见你有对象啊国家还允许发财呢也没见你有钱啊国家还允许你长的帅呢也没见你帅到哪去啊 (4月3日 18:12)

            This comment is a bit awkward/unclear but it seems to be quoting and then replying to another one:

            One more time :) I feel if a country allows homosexuals to get married then everyone will go marry homosexuals resulting in a decreasing population [unclear here but maybe] this would be destroying the world, [response may be starting here] Are you retarded? :) The country also allows people to date freely, yet I don’t see you having a partner [gf/bf] :) The country also allows people to get rich, but I don’t see you being rich. :) The country also allows you to be handsome. but I don’t see how you’re handsome at all. :)

            Second most upvoted:

            追风筝的少年1993:看那些反应激烈的恐同男生回复就想笑,就好像同性婚姻合法,他们就会很危险,一大批男生去抢他们似得。你以为你长得丑,女生不愿意要你,就会有男人要你了?真是瞎操心 (4月3日 18:46)

            When I see the overreacting replies of those homophobic men, I just want to laugh, as if the legalization of homosexual marriage would result in a huge threat to them, as if a herd of men would start fighting over them. You think that just because you’re ugly that when women don’t want you, there will be men who want you? Talk about worrying for nothing.

            One more:

            本尼的夏洛克:
            差距是什么?差距就是别人在尊重爱的前提下,同性婚姻合法化了。而这里还有一群人,说着繁衍,艾滋病这样的坐井观天的理由来说些恶心的话。繁衍就算是天性
            也要随人愿,丁克家族越来越多,也得人乐意生才能生。艾滋病更是可笑,国人对艾滋的害怕只用一句话形容就够了——【恐惧只是因为你无知】 (4月3日
            18:29)

            What is disparity? Disparity is when others respect love, homosexual marriage is legalized. But here there is a group of people who say disgusting things using ignorant and narrow-minded reasons like reproduction and AIDS. Even if reproduction is [natural/instinctual], it still follows people’s willingness/desire [to do so], With DINK [double income, no kids] households increasing, people have to want to give birth in order to give birth. AIDS is even more laughable. Our countrymen’s fear of AIDS can be described with just one phrase— You fear only because you are ignorant.

          • Markus Peg

            Thanks for taking the time to translate that Kai, this comment “The country also allows people to get rich, but I don’t see you being rich.” is hilarious!
            Second most up voted comment is correct, well put by the writer.

            Thanks again Kai for some insight into the comments for such a controversial topic.

          • DavidisDawei

            I sat next to a Chinese guy from Shanghai on a long flight and he told me there were 4 vices Chinese men are forgiven for having…
            1) Smoking
            2) Gambling
            3) Drinking
            4) Multiple Women/Cheating

          • Gordon Gogodancer

            hahaha and i’m sure the guy wasn’t even taking the piss

          • Kai

            I’ve never heard of it put that way (4 specific vices). Frankly, smoking and drinking as vices are more related to social norms than they are to “what Chinese women forgive Chinese men for”. Anyone who watches Mad Men should have this keenly fresh in their mind.

            As for gambling, ehhhh maybe. The man who squanders family wealth through gambling is a pretty common trope in Chinese stories.

            Cheating I think is more limited to men of means than in general, and while I don’t think cheating is significantly rarer in the West, I do think Judeo-Christian values make the phenomenon less overt. A big problem with cheating and tacit acceptance by wives is the economic dependency of women upon men in society. I want to think the more empowered and independent women are socialized into being, the less they’ll put up with cheating.

      • Insomnicide

        Boring is good. Good for China and Chinese people at least…. Boring means all is peaceful.

    • wnsk

      I, for one, am glad for the variety. Even if these videos were painful to watch.

      Way too many “serious” articles and all the accompanying China-bashing (and defending) in the last few weeks, if you ask me–that’s boring too.

      • Kai

        Both Joe and Fauna have a mean streak in them.

    • Southernortherner

      im almost proud..ive been here so long i feel for this young generation and what not..and its like.. i watched all videos..

      incuding the 30seconds of videogame shit beforehand and let me tell you..

      at least they are doing this! they are trying ..what does madonna in the 80s look like really? shit..what does she look like now!

      it is totally as you said that its just pop music on the other side of the world ..none of them are that bad and i think if you are as meddled in their ways as some of us..the ktv one…that shits almost deep man…for them of course all relative you know..but that is a situation young women are going through here with the little emperor man and all his whoremongering..the fact that that is what you can see on pop charts , no matter how low, just shows they have really changed in what is allowed to be spoken about.

      the diva one…. bro..that was the best fucking dancing ive seen in a chinese video and it wasnt overly sexed and pathetic and hilarious like the fox copy..it was like they tried hard…and the fact that they rhymed maserati and garagee was like..shit…but it was what it was and its theirs..and i find it beautiful..its elegant chinglish from a hot chick, how can you be mad at her..

      it helps that she drives a maserati..

  • The FRED FONG

    What the Fox! how do Chinese boys clean Bukkake off their keyboard?

    • SonofSpermcube

      They don’t, they just buy a new one when the keys won’t pop back.

  • another illuminati conspiracy

  • Irvin

    Somewhere in china there are some very irresponsible parents I like to thank for letting their children to do shit like this for our amusement.

    • Boris_Da_Bengal_Tiger

      For some it is amusement, to others it is torture!

      • Irvin

        Considered me amusingly tortured.

  • I love Sexy Chinese girls

    What the F did I just watched?

    • Southernortherner

      sexy chinese girls..

  • Gordon Gogodancer

    Good Chinese songs are really rare in my experience….i barely found any the past 9 years.
    This is decent one i found recently. If you like that style or not is a different matter, but i was happy to see that Chinese don’t produce just shite.
    http://www.xiami.com/play?ids=/song/playlist/id/1772171018/object_name/default/object_id/0#open

    • Insomnicide

      Well if you’re only looking for metal, of course you’d be stumped.
      Asian countries focus on pop, and there’s a few good pop artists…among hundreds of generic ones. Hu Yanbing for example, is quite decent…despite the Chinglish/Engrish.

      • Gordon Gogodancer

        I’m not only looking for metal. I actually don’t listen to metal usually. My point was simply that this song has something interesting and cool about whereas most Chinese song, and please do try and prove me wrong, are absolute shite.

  • Luck Of Fire

    ALL.OF.THE.SONGS.ARE.HORRIBLE.

  • Markus Peg

    None of them will play for me… I guess in a way, that’s a good thing…

    • Kai

      Are the video players loading or just blanks or not showing at all? Joe contemplated including copies on YouTube but got lazy because these videos should play outside of China. You may need to refresh the page a few times. It happens sometimes.

      • Markus Peg

        Never mind, they wouldn’t work on Firefox but worked on chrome (strange) but, i won’t look into it too much.
        The video was loading but i was stuck on the advert and the countdown would freeze. Thanks for the reply anyway.

  • Guang Xiang

    I can accept the second one, it’s silly like Lonely Island’s ‘I just had sex’. The last one made me LOL.

  • whuddyasack

    Sigh… sadly all these videos just continue to demonstrate that while young Chinese continually succumb to soft power, China really has no idea what soft power is.

  • hellothere

    Cute girls. Pretty standard pop music. It’s about time we got some C Pop and btw where is the C Horror?

  • diverdude7

    I think pretty girls pulling up their skirts to show me their panties is a darn fine idea! :-) sharing is next to goodliness

    • donscarletti

      Depends on the panties.

      I don’t know if I have outstanding taste in women or what, but I have never, ever lifted a woman’s skirt or rolled down her leggings to reveal underwear so ugly as these women are wearing.

      At least, with skirt still down, I can fantasise about her either wearing lovely panties or even better, going commando.

      • Probotector

        “…going commando”

        Yeah, and all the pubes you’d have to wade through. Nasty.

        • donscarletti

          All else being equal, the type of girl likely to go out with a short skirt and no panties is more likely to shave than one who doesn’t.

          • Boris_Da_Bengal_Tiger

            Have you done any researched on it, Professor Donscarletti?

          • ESL Ninja

            I’m working on a paper as we speak…

          • donscarletti

            I think most men do some research when we discover an angle to look into.

      • Zappa Frank

        haha, yes I’ve also noticed the grandmamma’s underwear that pretend to be sexy..

  • lonetrey / Dan

    One of the few times i can appreciate having only 2 bars of reception at work….

    • Guang Xiang

      It’s awesome that you can listen to music at work. Do you use a headset?

      • lonetrey / Dan

        Yes, if I’m listening to music, but usually I only do so during break time.

  • A Gawd Dang Mongolian

    Most videos that reach viral status did so without the intention of being extremely popular. Just good, or funny, or horrible. Or some strange mix of the three. They didn’t just try and emulate what everyone else was doing, and doing it badly like…euaushdiozdfsabvkld! That!

  • 나비

    The last one……oh my…..I can imagine the director’s logic, “**** talent, we’ll just shove this robot’s tits and ass in everyone’s face, that’ll surely work”……was so bad, it was enjoyable.

    • chosan

      is there any way we can export this to america and australia? and maybe turn them into zombies after it kills their brain cells???

    • Boris_Da_Bengal_Tiger

      You found it enjoyable?

      I couldn’t get past the cow.

      • Zappa Frank

        you missed the best part than.. her dance skills are amazing..

        • Boris_Da_Bengal_Tiger

          I guess I could watch it on mute…but I just don’t have it in me to watch it again.

    • Probotector

      No, it’s so bad it’s just bad.

  • Insomnicide

    Huang Rong originally debuted and worked as a ‘serious’ singer, then came Holiday and….the rest is history.

  • CheddyZeddy

    OMG i want 15 minutes of my life back. Shit going crazy in China. The lady from the last song must be from Dongguan. Fresh out of work. pronunciation is just too bad. Please , if you love yourself, don’t click on any of the videos, don’t i repeat , don’t

    • Insomnicide

      The last video must be why they had a crackdown in Dongguan…

  • The fuck is this shit

  • Pharenheit

    So. Painfully. Awkward.

  • YourSupremeCommander

    WTF

  • Glass Heart

    i don’t even…

  • Zen my Ass

    Pop music is crap everywhere, and if you copy crap you’ll only have second-rate crap…

  • Guy Forget

    Leave it to China to take “sleazy, slutty, trashy” to whole new level. I blame Kpop first, and now China is going to make it worse. Asian girls should be embarrassed and ashamed that they are being portrayed as prostitutes and cheap sex objects by basically wearing next to nothing in music videos that are catered towards the global community more so than their own country (hence the emphasis on using more english, playing the stereotypical roles to the foreign man). It’s not the actual singers/entertainers I dislike, but the greedy corporate mogul sellouts who are willing to sell off their people in sex and materialism to the world to gain more views, revenue, and gain a larger marketshare. It’s all about money and they are willing to objectify their women and prostitute them to the world markets. Just a shame and embarrasement.

    • Dax

      Because western female pop singers are well known for wearing only the most conservative outfits while performing. while performing.

      • Rick in China

        Of course that’s not the case. However, while it may be a fine line, there is a difference between doing something sleazy/slutty/trashy while being somewhat *unique*, and simply copying sleazy/slutty/trashy with the sole intent of catching some of the fame wave. it’s less disgusting than sad, in my opinion. The first video is just stupid, what the fuck is up with the girls pulling their already-higher-than-muff skirts up…so, so eager for some fame.

        Pointing this shit out doesn’t make miley’s ridiculous antics any less ridiculous, and that is detracting from the point.

        • Dax

          Agreed, but making it sound as if its a uniquely Asian phenomenon strikes me as somewhat unfair.

    • Probotector

      Remember when music used to be about music and not an image?

      • Insomnicide

        It still is, in Britain. In fact, one might say half of modern music originated from Britain considering how much impact their bands had on musical culture.

        • Probotector

          I know what you mean, but we really have a lot of cheesy pop garbage in the UK nowadays, mostly the legacy of Simon Cowell.

          • Markus Peg

            Despite the British songs wisdom, if you
            want to be someone’s lover, you should defiantly never “get” with their friends! – True story

    • wrle

      oh come on… kpop can make pretty crap stuff but this is just taking it down to another level, or several.

  • Mahmet Tokarev

    Chinese people should stop copying American trash culture (note: this includes most american pop culture).

    • Zappa Frank

      it is a copy of the copy… copy k pop that copied ’80s-’90s worse pop.. K pop however is somehow original, sometimes there are more singers and dancers on the stage than people watching the show..

  • Sambo

    You know, I like this a lot because it shows that inevitably communism is going to lose in China. At least they are doing it the right way, as opposed to the Soviet Union, and it will be an easy transition for them. But while China has so much work left to do with human rights and income equality, things like these show that the tide is moving inexplicably towards democracy and capitalism.

    The Chinese are very pragmatic, the most pragmatic nation on earth IMO and they have been slowly legislating themselves away from communism. At some point there will be a breaking point with a constitutional crisis but it won’t come with bloodshed.

    • Insomnicide

      While i agree with your point, that has nothing to do with trashy viral videos.

      Yes, they’re moving away from communism (or they already did) and authoritarianism. But these retarded MVs sure as hell had nothing to do with the progress.

  • dabubabooo

    You sure this is not Dongguan Ads after the last raid…?

  • Merohedral

    That last video “What does the fox say” is an exact copy of a viral video made by a Norwegian group called “Ylvis”. The lyrics and music are exactly the same, maybe not as funny as that cheap Chinese knock-off, but way less painful to watch. It has almost 400,000,000 views on Youtube.

    (I tried to find the video on Youku, but my connection keeps resetting.. I feel like behind the Great Firewall again..)

    • Dax

      Following the success of viral videos such as ‘Friday’ by 1Rebecca Black, ‘Gangnam Style’, and ‘What Does The Fox Say’…”

      • Merohedral

        Oops, sorry I missed that part. I hadn’t heard of “What Does the Fox Say” before… the only viral video I was familiar with was Gangnam Style. Too bad no one has copied it..

    • Probotector

      Welcome to modern music, mostly unoriginal covers.

      Don’t worry, Tails thought the Ylvis version sucked too.

    • Insomnicide

      It’s supposed to be a cover…but the lyrics end up sounding like a parody because of how mangled it is.

  • Probotector

    I can’t believe she actually said good good study day day up.

    • Insomnicide

      The language barrier is strong with this one…

      • Probotector

        I know what those phases mean, it’s just they’re obviously Chinglish, and would have been better if the actual Chniese 好好学习 天天向上 had been used.

        • Insomnicide

          I meant her.

        • Zappa Frank

          well what about 给这世界一点 colour see see.. it’s a song intended for Chinese people.. they can understand this chinglish.

    • donscarletti

      Excuse me while I go drink a can of The King is Always Lucky.

  • Boris_Da_Bengal_Tiger

    There should be a warning at the top of the article saying “Play the videos at your own risk!” or something. Seriously, should have read the comments first…

    Last one is horrible.
    I didn’t like the original either. Both are just bad, but this one is worse.

    4th one is didn’t really stand out or anything. Video seems like someone in old Chinese style clothing in a KTV.

    3rd one sounds similar to Kpop or other such music from US (Edit: I realised, never actually watched Lady Gaga video so can’t really compare). Basically something you’ll hear in a club but nothing special.

    2nd one was… well if I just heard the song and not the video it would be like its any other Chinese pop song.

    1st one is basically Kpop knock off. If you like Kpop, you’d like that, or if your drunk on the dance floor.

  • Ryo Saeba

    I think my IQ just went down a few points….

  • curious about implications of Holiday ” pull up skirt” dance move is going to have on ktv culture…

  • cantonizi

    Too many words in Chinese music, the beat is wrong and the same words don’t repeat enough in the lines.
    Should get a Bollywood crap music teacher to fix the mix.

  • Probotector

    English is a joke language.

  • Surfeit

    Monkey see, monkey do.

  • wrle

    where good where cool [insert chinese] where stay..
    daydaydaydaydaydaydayday..
    ??

  • filabusta

    It kind of loses its appeal when its stolen.

  • mattman183

    The Fox song loses 100 internets.

  • dude

    dat 谢容儿 one 非常超碉堡了 0-O…EXCEPT AT 1:47 B-)

  • Serialmania

    They tried to copy the K-POP and fail badly….

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