The Thing: “I drank Sanlu milk powder ever since I was small.”
Kidney Stone Gate Update:
- There are now thousands of babies with kidney stones and four babies have died.
- A government test of all the Chinese milk brands have shown that many contain melamine, including other big brands like Mengniu and Yili.
- Starbucks, which used Mengniu, will not serve milk anymore and recommends soy milk to customers.
- Many Hebei government officials have been arrested.
- Sanlu’s General Manager, Tian Wenhua, has also been arrested.
- Her daughter has run away to Switzerland, after her mom told her that she has already prepared everything for her.
- The government has instructed the media and BBS forums to limit discussion about Sanlu and the melamine milk problem.
These pictures are collected from the Mop topic, “Sanlu Photoshop Pictures Collection, Continuously Updated (everyone join in),” before it was recently deleted:
When the Sanlu brand melamine milk powder incident happened, some people were happy that it was not the Yili brand, another big dairy products company:
Liu Yifei: “Good thing I am a spokesperson for Yili, hahaha!”
Will Pan: “Celebration that Yili was not chosen to be inspected!”
Yi Jianlian: “I told you all to drink Yili before, right? No nutrition is still better than melamine!”
Yili Group Chairman and CEO: “Can you all be more low-key?! At this time, we should not attract attention to ourselves! Dammit, do you all not see that even I do not dare to kick a man when he is down?”
Of course, after the government tests, Yili was also found to have melamine in their products so they were not innocent either.
Yi Jianlian: “Do not even think about stealing my milk powder!”
Yao Ming: “Coach, get me two glasses of Sanlu, and I can run the whole game without having to pee!”
Melamine damages the kidneys over time and causes kidney stones as well as difficulty urinating. That is why many of these photoshops will make jokes about Sanlu affecting peeing.
Caption: A man who was unable to urinate after drinking Sanlu went insane, broke into police station, and began attacking.
This is Yang Jia, the man who was recently convicted of murdering several Shanghai police officers earlier this year.
Tian Wenhua (Sanlu CEO): “I am innocent, I got the milk from the dairy farmers.”
Dairy Farmer: “I am wronged…do not blame me, it [the cow] did it.”
Cow: “None of my business, I just come out to eat grass.”
Grass: “Mother came from her mother. Grass came from grass’s mother. I came from my mother.”
Government Official: “I declare: The ultimate culprit for the Sanlu incident: Cao Ta Ma.”
["Fuck Its Mother" or "Mother of Grass"]
Babies: “‘Cao Ta Ma,’ who is that?
Vladimir Putin: Use 500 SU-37s to exchange with China for the Sanlu formula! No cost is to be spared to get this kind of chemical weapon!
Sanlu, Infant Stone Milk Powder
One cup every day, create one generation of stone people.
Crying Baby: “Fuck! I drank a lot of Sanlu! What can I do! Fuck your ancestors!”
Young people snorting Sanlu milk powder (instead of kingfen)…and wearing pink.
Squating Man: “Ever since I drank Sanlu milk powder, it took three months before I finally pooped it out.”
Saddam Hussein: “If I had drank this milk powder so I did not have go to the toilet, I would not have been caught by George W. Bush, motherfucker! Despicable!
Sanlu brand melamine. One pack replaces five packs!
More Three Skull, more nutrition.
Three Skull dairy products.
鹿 lu4 (deer) sounds like 髅 lou2 (skull).
New product!
Melamine Milk
Nourishment is more exciting!
10% milk, 90% melamine
Ten people use, ten people get kidney stones
Michael Scofield: “In three days, they are going to make Lincoln drink Sanlu! What am I going to do! What am I going to do…”
Girl under Cow: “After the incident with Sanlu, I no longer dare to drink milk powder, I must make do with this!”
Sanlu stones, high quality, good price!
Jumping Boy: “I finally pissed!”
Sanlu’s new spokesman.
Liu Xiang: “Coach, I drank Sanlu, I cannot urinate.”
Liu Xiang: “If I had just been a spokesperson for Sanlu, I could blame withdrawing from the Olympics on the dairy farmers…”
Kim Jong-il: “Comrades: I thank China for giving us Sanlu milk powder. Our troops can stay in the trenches without urinating, increasing combat effectiveness! Make the South Korean army hold their urine until they die, let us see which side can hold it in longer!”
George W. Bush: We must establish a Sanlu defense system! It is too frightening!
Drink Sanlu and a good figure will naturally be revealed~~
This is a picture of Furong Jiejie, a Chinese woman who became famous on the internet because she always thinks she has a beautiful body.
Furong Jiejie: “Who says I am fat? ! I simply drank Sanlu and am swollen with urine!”
Feng Shui Bu Jing Yun: “I took a Jissbon, put Sanlu milk powder inside, added water, created a Jiss rod, and will test out its power for everyone!”
After being hit by the Jiss rod, passed out for 16 hours. Stone milk powder, really powerful!
From the video game, Crysis.
Spokesperson: “Sanlu milk powder, us stepmothers all approve!”
“Eat this milk powder, save on diapers!”
Sanlu Milk Powder: The Ultimate Culprit
[From top to bottom]
Fan holding banner: “China must shoot!”
Player scratching head: “Sanlu? I think I drank it before. How can it be like this?”
Referee with player #2: “Hurting others because your own kidney is not good. your heart is not balanced.”
China football coach: “Why did my children not shoot, turns out it was because their kidneys are bad.”
Three players: “What is going on? I was still okay when I took a bath last night.”
Inspection official: I don’t care if you are Zhou Zheng Long or Xie Ya Long, as long as you have a bad kidney, you are an insect.
[In Chinese, the opposite of 龙 long2, dragon is 虫 chong2, insect. Dragons are big and powerful, but insects are small and insignificant. It also rhymes.]
Xie Ya Long, head of China Football Association: “Who says my kidneys are bad? You tell me. Are you all trying to fuck with me? I tell you, no way. I do not strike this pose for no reason, my kidneys are fine!”
Foreign player in white jersey talking to Chinese player #8: “Buddy, do not lose faith, I will tell you a trick I do not tell everyone: Leave the country, quickly, do a few difficult push-ups, I promise it will work.”
Sanlu Pharmaceutical Limited Liability Company
Frequent Urge To Pee, Effective upon drinking.
San Lu Children’s Stone Milk Powder
Please be careful when drinking milk.
Weapons of Mass Destruction.
Jokes involving Sanlu have become very popular ever since the melamine baby formula milk powder incident happened. Many posters on BBS forums often reply to topics with only pictures. Here are two Photoshops used when commenters sometimes use when they disagree with the “lou zhu” or the person who started the topic:
“Lou zhu” drank Sanlu milk powder! [he is a stone statue]
“Oh my god! ‘Lou zhu’ is drinking Sanlu, and is even drinking it happily!”
Mop is well-known for having many members that are good at using Photoshop. For example, when someone on KDS requests a picture be photoshopped, others often tell them to go ask on Mop. There are some more Sanlu Photoshops on NetEase, if it has not yet been deleted.
This is Part 5 of the the Sanlu Milk Powder Incident, see also:
- Kidney Stone Gate: Fake Baby Milk Powder, Sanlu & Baidu? (Part 1)
- Kidney Stone Gate: Sanlu Paid Consumers To Keep Quiet (Part 2)
- Kidney Stone Gate: Sanlu Apology & Melamine Test Results (Part 3)
- Kidney Stone Gate: Baidu Denies Censoring Search Results (Part 4)
Related Posts:
- Sanlu representative issues public apology & bows to consumers hurt by its melamine milk powder. Recent government test results show 22 brands contain melamine » 14 comments
- Latest developments in the Sanlu milk powder baby formula with melamine controversy reveal that a Zhejiang man was paid to keep quiet about potential problems. » 21 comments
- Over 70 Chinese babies have developed kidney stones due to all drinking the same Sanlu brand milk powder. Sanlu blames counterfeiters, Chinese citizens outraged » 49 comments
- Baidu issues full statement denying censoring negative search results related to Sanlu and the melamine milk powder incident. Chinese netizens remain skeptical. » 22 comments
- Chinese netizens create silly Photoshops of the Beijing CCTV Fire that destroyed the new Mandarin Oriental hotel. Includes Godzilla, Ultraman, War of the Worlds » 60 comments
Kidney Stone Gate: Sanlu Apology & Melamine Test Results 
Kidney Stone Gate: Sanlu Paid Consumers To Keep Quiet 
Kidney Stone Gate: Fake Baby Milk Powder, Sanlu & Baidu? 
Kidney Stone Gate: Baidu Denies Censoring Search Results 
CCTV Fire: Funny Photoshops By Chinese Netizens 
lmao @ liu xiang’s olympic picture xD
Not funny
Sanlu 赢了啦。
Make so many babies die.
God kill them all Sanlu shareholders and the govt alongside with it.
hahahahahaha
Boy, these people need to work on their humor. Not one of these made me laugh or even smile. Is this humor the best China has to offer?
@ dave:
Aw come on, some of them are pretty funny. Maybe its a pop culture divide or something. Though, personally, I think the very last one is just funny in of itself because of the art. Bush’s defense system? That’s funny. Putin? He’s always funny…when not looking outright sinister. Prison Break? Little boy getting his head cut off? Come on, that’s pretty funny just because it wasn’t noticed, right?
Kai,
Maybe it is just the translations. “Pop culture divide”?? I don’t think so.
But anyway enjoy your laughs:)
Dave
I liked first one. But any other, which involves kids, are funny, but gross.
those Japanese cartoon adaptions are god-damned funny
@ dave:
Yeah, humor often gets lost in translation. The reason I said maybe pop-culture divide is because its quite true. Think of the icanhazcheezeburger or lolcat stuff. Not everyone gets it, but for those who do, they’re damn funny. With the photoshops above, the fu rong jie jie stuff or the snorting kingfen stuff are pretty squarely China pop-culture, much less the photoshop blaming Sanlu for the joke that is the Chinese national football/soccer team. The Bush and Putin stuff are political pop-culture. I imagine those would resonate with most people even outside of China.
@ mark liu:
LoL, yeah, totally. You have to hand it to Japanese anime for being able to exaggerate to a whole new level. Hilarious stuff.
This website very disrespect to China and Chinese culture. Much shame for you, piggy writer who attack Chinese greatness in momentary time of weak.
Bong is a dumbass. You’re weak now because your own scandals made your country weak. Why blame others when it started with your own people? Stfu.
I’m Chinese and I don’t think this website is intended to attack China; the most outraged people and the most affected people in this scandal are fellow Chinese…we really do need to address these serious issues because it is in our own self-interest, China will become stronger after it tackles these problems, and that is the goal here.
It may not be pretty exposing these kind of things, but remember, it’s better to solve problems than to ignore them, it’s important that we’ll always have the last laugh…
What the F*@k?! kids are dieing and mothers are greaving over this. Please People get real and take back your souls
I find it funny…
When carefore said something about Chinese. Millions protested and stopped people from entering shops. There were many
When a Chinese poisoned the milk of infants… People write on the internet and say, “Well, this lets address this in rational mannor.”
I think that the way Sanlu is being handled is fine. But, I just find it weird that carrefore and CNN comments can make people go into the streets, while actual milk poisoning causes photoshops.
love the dig at Chinese men soccer team!
Let me tell you which 23 are the funniest:
1. Squatting Man on beach
2. That funny photo of the Chinese chick sucking a cow’s teat： 卧妞嘬牛
3. Kim Jong-Il
#1 and #2 on the above list actually made me laugh out loud.
I can’t lie, I totally LoLed.
as a chinese, why should you post so many ugly things on your web,especially for the foreigners?
just cant laugh at this……it’s sad, and it’s shame
nice
The Beijing Olympics were spectacular to say the least. But this Melamine incident is really a bummer! Why would people do such a thing! All concerned must burn in hell!
Some of the best shit I’ve seen on this website yet. You’ve made my day.
More…More…More…Please.
THE PICTURES ARE Satire THE SANLU MATTERS .
The pic of the pregnant little girl was disturbing. It didn’t need to be posted in this article :(