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Chinese People’s Secrets: Part 10

Chinese People's Secrets

More translated secrets of Chinese people…

From Tianya, “Share your heart’s darkest secrets…do you have the courage?”:

阴暗的秘密:

I have a steady boyfriend, but I often go out to dinner [dates] and pubs, have had 20 and up “sexy partner”, and maintain good relations with all of them. This kind of situation I want to continue and do not want to change.

阴暗的秘密:

I have visited prostitutes before, so many times I myself do not remember how many.
All of the male colleagues I know have all visited prostitutes before (some married, some single).
My uncles have also had relations with outside women behind their wives’ backs!
Whether my father has or not I am not sure. I am afraid to ask, but I believe he has.
I believe this world’s morals are just a mask.
Once the mask comes off, each and everyone are all devils!

汲汲营营:

My cousin was really really naughty when he was small, and my temper was not good either, so we were always fighting.
Once when we were young, I was with him at a friend’s house playing.
I was only 8 or 9-years-old.
I forgot how he made me so angry, but I used my hand to hit his mouth several time, and slapped him a few times.
I also let that friend hit him, but that friend was very temperate, did not dare, and only hit him once very very lightly.
At first he [the cousin] would talk back, but then he began crying.
After that incident, I felt very bad, and treated him very well afterward. To this day, I still feel very guilty.

阴暗的秘密:

1. To lose weight, I would go to the bathroom after I eat something to vomit the food out…I really hate myself for this.
2. I really really want to know what it feels like to ML but I also want to give my first time to my husband, so I watch adult videos and ZW…I do not know how long I can continue like this.

阴暗的秘密:

I have never loved my current boyfriend. Yesterday I got angry and he thought I was afraid of losing him. In reality, I was crying because I gave up my first relationship and really regret it…

阴暗的秘密:

In the past, my wife felt I did not love her, did not value her, and went to bed with another man and even made a sex video.
I chose to forgive her and continue being with her, trying my hardest to give her what she wants. I will not get revenge on her even though I have this kind of opportunity. However, I will remember this incident for the rest of my life.

阴暗的秘密:

Starting from 6-years-old, I was sexually abused for almost six years.
I never told anyone, including my mother.
In middle school, I was sexually abused by my physical education teacher.
He and my mother even knew each other.
I still keep these secrets.

Now I think I am so cowardly.
If I had a fiery personality I would not have been harassed again.
People around me all think I am a cheerful child.
Actually, I also want to die, but cannot give up my loved ones.

Afterward, I met my first love, whom I extremely extremely loved.
I only told him that had been abused by a teacher before, and did not dare tell him about the even earlier incident.
It was also my first love who helped me have hope for my future life.

But my own sensitive and extreme personality resulted in us breaking up.
It has been eight years now, I cannot forget about him,
Even if he long ago fell in love with someone else, and says to her the things he once said to me.

In my real life, I keep changing boyfriends.
Every time it begins, I always want to seriously pursue [the relationship],
but every time I want to genuinely love a person, this person will leave me.

Debauched after break up.
This saying describes my life after [breaking up] very well.

Later,
I met a person, who loved me for four years.
Right when I was prepared to be with him, he found out I had relations with my first love,
and was unable to accept that the fact that I was not a virgin.
Had he known everything else, I wonder how he would react.

Before, I had a very good job, but because I was too believing that a man could give me happiness, I resigned.
Actually, I do not have the qualifications to have love, or a family.
Deserted by my parents, indulging myself with memories, unable to free myself.

阴暗的秘密:

Every time I am in a bad mood, I look for a one night stand. Up to now, I do not know how many girls I have lied with. I do not know if I can still meet true love in the future…

阴暗的秘密:

I often want to break up with my current boyfriend, thinking he is useless, not making progress [in life], no will power like a man, but I also do not have the courage to tell him…pitiful secret.

阴暗的秘密:

When I got married, I was a virgin.
My husband was sexually impotent.

Six years after getting married, I began to cheat.

Maybe I will get divorced when I am old.
I could no longer endure it.

Note: Many of the these usernames are the same because people are using a public/shared account to post their secrets so no one knows their normal Tianya username.

To be continued…

See more Chinese People’s Secrets.

Written by Fauna

Fauna is a mysterious young Shanghainese girl who lives in the only place a Shanghainese person would ever want to live: Shanghai. In mid-2008, she started chinaSMACK to combine her hobby of browsing Chinese internet forums with her goal of improving her English. Through her tireless translation of popular Chinese internet news and phenomenon, her English has apparently gotten dramatically better. At least, reading and writing-wise. Unfortunately, she's still not confident enough to have written this bio, about herself, by herself.

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