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Chinese People’s Secrets: Part 4

Chinese People's Secrets

More translated secrets of Chinese people…

From Tianya:

变态000:

Finally found a fake id [many of these posters are using username accounts that are different from their normal ones, so they can post their secret without anyone knowing it is them]. Let me join the fun.

  1. I once went to bed with with a colleague I had only known for one month, and even did it once in the office.
  2. I like women’s feet, but I only like to look, I have several thousands of pictures downloaded from the internet.
  3. Although I am married, I often SY, because I feel this maintains my condition.
  4. I once called a phone sex number, talked with the operator about sex, and had them make sounds, etc.
  5. In the past, I often look for 30-40-year-old mature women on QQ to talk about sex or chat naked. Sometimes I will encounter those that do not satisfy me and I will pull out my “xiao DD” [penis] to disgust them (is this enough?).
  6. I always want to find a prostitute, but have not had the chance, also do not have the courage.

Kao, having written to this point, I just discovered that I am actually pretty magnificent!

tylxlcool:

Beijing hotel lobby, encountered a big chested man, mutually swallowed saliva, had a one night stand.
Went to evaluate a prospective marriage partner [matchmaking by parents], encountered an old schoolmate, promptly got a room [to have sex], then told my parents we were not suitable for each other, but we still keep in contact.
My best partner is a male schoolmate, though this person is rather vain, and what more his financial situation is not good, so I pay every time we get a room, and he looks at himself in the mirror for 30 minutes after taking a bath.
There is an old man who is fanatical about me, even once renting a one room apartment near my home. I have gone over a few times before.

缝衣服:

When I was small and went with my father to go take a bath, we saw each other naked.
I looked at my dad and asked: Daddy, why is the hair on top white, but the hair on the bottom black?
Dad replied: The things the top encounters all cause headaches, but the things the bottom encounters are all happy!

LV的老总在流泪: (copied from an older topic and reposted by another user)

Just finished a telephone call with a 23-year-old beauty. She told me a colleague in her work unit [company/organization] that has been pursuing her has pursued her to her home. Her mother is also there, and he brought lilies, and apparently another colleague will be going over to her house tonight to eat. Her work unit has three guys who are competing for her, but friends, do you know what relationship she and I have?

Today, she got off work early (sometime after 1:00, she also works at the government department but she is not an government employee), and asked me if I wanted to fuck her. I said I was in a meeting (actually I was not, she is too annoying) I have already told her very clearly that it is not possible for us to be together, because she kind of likes to play hard to get, but other guys all have not been able to get her. She will not even let them hold her hand, but I can have sex with her whenever I want. She is even very BT, letting one of the guys of often kneel down before her. Because of this, I have chastised/admonished her many times.

LZ will definitely ask me, us kind of people will usually only have a one time thing [one night stand], so why do we still have that kind of relationship? We have only known each other for one month (had sex maybe 10 times), and the main thing is that her KJ [“kou jiao,” blowjob] “kungfu” [skill] is too good, I really like it, so I have not been able to let her go!

So those three never-even-held-hands guys guys, sigh, sad…

So how did I and that 23-year-old meet each other (I am 27-years-old)? We met each other through matchmaking [usually through parents for marriage later]!!! This was also the first time I participated in matchmaking, because in the past I was a completely SB. Those girls [previous girlfriends/interests?] all had other men, and now I will never be a SB ever again!

敏感字符08:

I once believed the GCD [Gong Chan Dang, the Communist Party].

xlfd128:

One night in high school I urinated out the window of my dorm!!

张艺谋自裁谢罪:

Actually,
I
have always
believed
myself to be
a
misunderstood
genius!!!

已走过:

When a girl is kissing me, I like to SY. This feels better than actually having sex, but I always let them GC a few times first / I simply cannot come while I am inside her~~~

吕小静:

“Tiaotan” [the “odd topics/general discussion” category] is better, “bagua” [the “gossip” category] is a trash dump. [This poster is referring to a previous poster linking to another “secrets” topic in another Tianya forum category who said that one was “better.” I will post secrets from that one later.]

From when I was small, I have been especially foolish/stupid, curious about everything, and could never change this about myself because I get bored easily. Often, my mood would be so agitated that I say bad words, collect bad words. I love going online to watch other guys chat naked and then feel that guys are really easy to deceive. I do not get along with girls; I do not really acknowledge them and they do not really acknowledge me.

I often lock myself in the bathroom, to look at and touch myself. Once, I shaved my legs and cut myself. In front of my parents, I am a good child.

吕小静:

My biggest failure was finding an extremely talented student to marry and then get kicked out, this person is not from here, I felt very hateful, became addicted to the internet, and after that my heart became even more abnormal.

I have tried one night stands, very exciting, but after climaxing, I feel I was taken advantaged of and always cry.

I want to try it with a female schoolmate, but have not had the opportunity.

To be continued…

See more Chinese People’s Secrets.

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Written by Fauna

Fauna is a mysterious young Shanghainese girl who lives in the only place a Shanghainese person would ever want to live: Shanghai. In mid-2008, she started chinaSMACK to combine her hobby of browsing Chinese internet forums with her goal of improving her English. Through her tireless translation of popular Chinese internet news and phenomenon, her English has apparently gotten dramatically better. At least, reading and writing-wise. Unfortunately, she's still not confident enough to have written this bio, about herself, by herself.

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