More translated secrets of Chinese people…
From Tianya, “Share your heart’s darkest secrets…do you have the courage?”:
I am not filial, seeing my mother buy insurance…I suddenly had an evil wish.
I am ashamed to be her son…
Ever since I was small, the impression I gave others was a fearless,
clever, arrogant girl.
Actually, it is all faked.
Because of some things that happened in my family when I was small,
I developed the habit of disguising myself from the time I started school,
making myself the person with the most friends and the most welcomed.
I also have many friends who are willing to do anything to help me,
but in reality my heart is so gloomy that I do not trust anyone.
In the 6th grade, there was a time
where a little boy would often secretly touch my butt.
He would intentionally sit next to me
and then reach over with his hand.
At the time, I felt it was exceptionally disgusting and frightening.
Every time I saw him, I would sit far far away,
but I never told anyone,
because I felt it was embarrassing.
Later in the fourth year of university, our elementary school had a get-together.
When I saw him
I subconsciously avoided him,
feeling he was very disgusting.
Now when I encounter a pervert on the bus,
I will absolutely use the most strength to immediately crack down on him.
I still feel men are very disgusting,
but I am not a “la la” [lesbian].
1. When I was small, I often stole things, my method was not sophisticated, and the things I have stolen before include: the neighbor’s ayi’s gold earrings, jewelery, cosmetics, etc.; friends’ and schoolmates’ poetry books; classmates’ and friends’ tasty things to eat.
2. When I was small, I played sexually suggestive games with my friends, the kind where we took off our pants.
3. When I was very small, I would look at those mature topic books in my home, including the “married couple’s life guide” my parents hid under the mattress, and learned to masturbate (actually it was not real masturbation); once I had a computer after I began university, I secretly watched so many adult videos and sex novels.
4. When I had a boyfriend, I would talk about sex with other people behind his back, and with regards to language, I overstepped the boundaries.
5. I especially love lying.
6. Especially lazy.
I now repent for all of these dark things! I will not commit these crimes again in the future!
1. Bisexual, began having sexual fantasies in fifth grade, masturbating, and most want to be raped.
2. In elementary school third grade, I and another girl took off our clothes, wore big people’s bras, put on menstrual pads, and connected the bottom half of our bodies,..in sixth grade, I was touched by boys. In junior high, I had sex. When I was 15, I contracted a venereal disease/STD (aside from doctors, no one knows).
3. Ever since I was small, I detested my family members and relatives. To this day, I constantly think about tormenting and murdering them.
4. On the outside, I am amazingly pretty, but I am really dirty. I piss on the marble floor of my bedroom and the house is full of trash. When my period comes, I do not go out, I just stay at home, not using menstrual pads, and leak all over the place, all over the bed and chairs.
5. I steal things from stores, adult’s money, but my methods are messy and have been caught many times.
6. As long as it is someone else’s boyfriend or girlfriend, I will want to seduce them.
7. When I see infants I will fiercely pinch them when others are not paying attention. For pregnant women, I want to fiercely kick their bellies.
8.9.10…there are too many, I am simply a rotting, festering person, and I plan on living gloomily like this from now on.
I am a girl, and hair grows on my stomach/belly, the kind that is obviously visible. There are also some on my nipples, a few strands on both sides. Because of this, I do not dare date. I am 20-some-years old now, and have never had a boyfriend, afraid they will see.
Really want to be able to lick my own B [vagina], but I am not flexible enough.
I am working in a city in the south [of China]. There is a supermarket that is very close to my workplace (just next door), and it also sells breakfast, so every morning I come to this place to eat breakfast. If I finish eating breakfast quickly, I read some books (this supermarket also sells books). Because I have been there a lot, I am very familiar with the place, often hatching evil thoughts, wanting to steal things, and I feel the staff absolutely would not find out. I am often there reading books, and the staff does not know.
Later, I went back to my hometown, and by chance finally learned that those goods/products all have magnets, and an alarm would sound if you pass by the supermarket doors…
I…dammit…now just thinking about it I get scared. Fortunately, I did not do anything stupid at that time, otherwise, so many of my colleagues would know…it would have been so disgraceful!!!
When I was young, my father would hit me every day. After growing up, he would insult me.
I have thought of killing him countless times.
But now he has had a stroke, and is sick.
Once again I cannot not take care for him.
I am suffering. I hate him, but he is helpless, and I have no way of arguing with him.
But with regards to the past, I am very hateful,
That is why I am suffering.
When I was small, I would fight with my mom, saying that if things were not done the way I wanted them, I would drink urine. Mom would not listen. So I pissed directly into a cup, and drank it…
I am a little marriage crazy, and once I like a guy, I will immediately plan to things like how many children we should have.
Many girls like me, and almost all of them have long-term boyfriends, some have already gotten married. Very awkward. But I am definitely heterosexual. I was once confused for a time, but after some consideration, I still felt marriage was more important.
Note: Many of the these usernames are the same because people are using a public/shared account to post their secrets so no one knows their normal Tianya username.
To be continued…
See more Chinese People’s Secrets.