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Netizens Discuss If Reporting Rape Jeopardizes Wedding

牛奶@咖啡 (Milk@Coffee). Picture from: http://ent.sina.com.cn/y/2008-04-14/18291986657.shtml (through Google.cn)

From Mop, “Friend Was Raped, Who Can Tell Me What To Do?“:

I have a good friend, a girl, who is to be married on October 1st. However, just before her wedding, this unfortunate incident occurred:

The night before the Mid-Autumn Festival, when everyone was basking in the festive mood, my friend was raped. The vicious man even used his phone to take pictures of my friend after she was violated. My friend tried to take his phone to delete the pictures but was unsuccessful – she was even beaten really badly.

The same night, she told me what happened over SMS and my first thought was to call the police. However, there is a lot to consider:

  1. She is getting married in October, if this incident is made public, it is very possible that it will affect her future.
  2. The police chiefs of nearby police stations in the area are either colleagues or friends of her future father-in-law; if she reports this incident, her father-in-law will definitely find out. Whether or not her public servant father-in-law (who is a very traditional man) can accept a “shamed” daughter-in-law is unknown. Indeed, gossip can be malicious.
  3. She is afraid of hurting her husband and how the incident will cast a shadow on their relationship.

If we don’t call the police, the criminal remains above the law and this will also be a worry:

  1. It is very possible that this criminal will continue harming other girls, and nobody would want their loved ones to be the next victim.
  2. The criminal has pictures of my friend.  Maybe in the future when her life is stable these pictures might surface and be used for extortion – after experiencing such trauma and finally being able to move on with life, nobody would want to get hurt a second time.
  3. If she remains silent about this incident, she will always remember this incident everytime she looks at her husband – even if she is the victim.

Dear Moppers, please don’t take this incident lightly as an unhappy love affair; because it truly is unfortunate. This didn’t happen to your loved ones so of course it’s easy to take it lightly.

Please think about how to handle the situation to alleviate her pain~~ All of you who visit Mop please don’t be perverts!

Asian girl alone in bathtub. Picture from: http://hi.baidu.com/shuigeju/blog/item/9ccb192cdef30ee98a13992f.html (through Google.cn)

This story was first posted on Mop about a week ago. There are over 1800 comments on Mop. Here are some:

Call the police

The person involved is the writer of this post. She plays around and then spins a yarn on Mop to gain sympathy and even tries to be righteous, bitch!

If she doesn’t call the police, it’ll be even worse when her father-in-law finds out!

Call the police, and she must be honest with her husband. If he doesn’t accept you, it means that he doesn’t love you as much as you think he does. If he comforts you and accepts you, then you really can be with him for life.

Must discuss this with her husband
Let her husband decide, it’s better to explain now than it is later. The husband then discusses it with his father. Let them decide if they want to call the police.
I’ve already said, not reporting this can lead to a situation.
He might want your money after you get married.
Preposition you with sexual favours
It’s possible that when you give him the money he will rape you again.
You might satisfy him this time but he might want more money in the future.
Rape again.
An endless cycle; until you call the police or one of you drops dead.
My understanding so far…

Must call the police, don’t hesitate.
Just have to consider that she is a woman, must definitely call the police or she will be helping the rapist escape punishment.
If her husband loves her, he will definitely understand her and love her.
If he doesn’t love her then she might as well not get married.
Don’t bear this by yourself and let it become a lifetime burden.

Hire a contract killer
Being reasonable in this society is useless.
You can only survive by being more ruthless than others.

To be honest, when I see posts like this I can’t be bothered to comment. A large number of women and their various inattentions in daily life have given lechers ample opportunity. If they really care about themselves, their family, they should learn how to protect themselves. Since this has happened already, I believe the most viable option is to discuss it with her boyfriend, and the call the police. Don’t be afraid, because true colours are revealed in difficult times, if you remain silent, you won’t be able to face other repercussions in the future. A man who truly loves you will bear this burden with you, and let that criminal face the consequences he deserves.

Life is just like rape, since you can’t fight it, you might as well enjoy it. lz, what do you think?

If there’s too much consideration, it’s simple, was she a virgin before the rape?
If calling the police is a must, then you’ve already delayed enough.
If not, why bother calling the police.

1: Call the police and ask the black society for help (What’s important is to find the pictures)
2: Break up with the boyfriend! (The boyfriend and his family don’t want to live with the shadow of her incident). Also, how was she raped? Please choose:
A: She ran into a bad person after finishing work at night! (Worth sympathising)
B: Was she raped by someone she knew? (That’s not good)

Let her think it through, Writer
Lots of rich men’s wives still go for male prostitutes, just take your friend as a prostitute.
She fucked a guy for free, so…
I don’t think it’s wrong.

Use violence to deal with violence, it might not be any use to call the police…
It might cause more trouble.
After all, the police in real life aren’t as responsible as the ones you see on television

I’d rather you really tried to resist
What I’m trying to say is, a man who truly loves you does not care about your virginity, but you women will never understand.

Ask someone from the black society to get rid of the rapist…

She can hide if no pictures were taken
But if pictures were really taken I suggest she call the police immediately, or else two days later it will be all over the internet.

Call the police!
If you call the police, you might lose your husband, and everything in the future. If you believe you can hide this for your entire life and not call the police, can you really do that? The pictures are in someone’s hands, you won’t know when he’ll come looking for you!

I suggest not to call the police, even if you do call the police there isn’t much you can do, you’d also be kicking up a fuss. To the police, these trivial cases aren’t important because even if they solve the case they won’t get much credit.

Call the police. Traditional values will be the death of you.

The main thing is her husband’s attitude, if he is understanding then it’s alright to call the police.
The family should be secondary. She was raped, the wrongdoer was the rapist, it’s unavoidable and I think it is understandable.
If I was her father-in-law I’d let her call the police.

She should first tell her future husband because what he thinks is important. Good job, Writer!

1. Calm down, don’t call the police, look for evidence (if any) and retain it.
2. Tell your husband, because of no alternative reasons, postpone the wedding to avoid her husband accusing her of lying to him.
3. Call the police when the rapist surfaces again, or you could directly seek him out with the help of others, beat him to a pulp, and then call the police to catch him.
4. Be honest with your husband, see what he thinks and then decide if you get married.

Get married first.
The rapist is a stranger, so it will be hard to find him in a short time. Never tell your husband, bear the pain yourself, don’t let your husband be affected by your incident during the happiest time of his life. Find some other way to find the bastard and use violence to deal with violence!

You didn’t call the police immediately after it happened so forget about calling the police.
The days will pass.
It’s no big deal even if your luck is good.
I’m guessing you can’t convince your friend either.

Sad, I’m so sad.
Why is it always women who get hurt~~~
Physically
Psychologically
Customary values dictate that women are victims.

Believe me~ If you call the police, not only will you not catch the bastard, you will also expose your personal tragedy, and at that time you will be paying double the price for your actions.

Looks like only the black society can handle this, if you’ve got money, anything can be done!

If she totally doesn’t know the rapist, then don’t call the police. Even if she calls the police they won’t be able to find him, so what’s the point? It happened so long ago already.

Call the police. It’s better to be honest than to live a lie for the rest of your life. It is also a test for her man.

Secretly hire a contract killer, ask for a professional, don’t leave any traces, don’t have an aftermath, finish the job neatly, happiness for life!

Prepare to break off your engagement~~! Call the police, if the guy doesn’t understand then don’t get married~! This involves your life, think over it carefully.

Simple. If there weren’t any threats from the guy then forget it. If he didn’t threaten you it’s no use calling the police.

Get married, get pregnant and then call the police.

You were forced to make a mistake once, don’t make another mistake. Call the police, be honest.

Looking forward to seeing these pictures on the net…

The original topic was later updated with the following:

Thanks to all of you for your suggestions. My friend has chosen to forget and let go. She is determined to walk out of the darkness of this incident. I admire her strength and courage.

At the same time, I would like for everyone to take the high road and not discuss this incident further.

Alone in the dark by the window. Picture from: http://hi.baidu.com/scssi/blog/item/56a8b00a37045e1b95ca6b8e.html (through Google.cn)

Images: These images were found on Google.cn and are not directly related to the original post.

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Written by Duckee

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