Shanghai Man Lands On Lover, Survives Suicide Jump

From NetEase:

Unable to endure public disgrace, middle-aged man clutches his “nubile lover” and attempts suicide

At 4pm in the afternoon of January 3rd, in a residential area near Changning road in Shanghai a 50-year-old man jumped from the sixth floor, landing on a bed of flowers below, and was knocked unconscious. This reporter made his way to the scene, and found out that the jumper had been sent to hospital. Residents later said: as the man in question jumped he was holding a young girl, and after impacting with the ground she was squashed under him, which is why he wasn’t killed.

Eyewitnesses: the girl exploded under his weight

According to eyewitnesses: “Upon seeing that man clutching that woman while jumping, I thought it was a tragic double suicide. When they landed I heard a loud bang, which sounded like an exploding tyre”, “I went closer and saw a man of approximately 50-years-old laying on the ground, but couldn’t see the girl who he’d jumped with at all. All I could see was some woman’s hair and a pile of clothes, it scared me to death”, “As for what woman, well, it was a dressed up inflatable doll, the kind of fake woman made specially for men to play with, go figure.”

Neighborhood residents: we understand why old Yang would want to play with an inflatable doll

Neighborhood residents revealed: the man in question is surnamed Yang, and is an old neighbor. He has been a widower for some years, his only son studies overseas, and in recent years has always been alone. His neighbors said that whenever they’d see him he’d always be smiling, but didn’t enjoy conversation, and had it not been for today’s accident, they wouldn’t have imagined that he had suicidal tendencies.

When this reporter asked about old Yang playing with an inflatable doll, most neighbors expressed their understanding. “It’s not easy, living for so many years, raising a child”, “I think that playing with something like that isn’t a bad thing, better that than going and doing something not so clean.” “Old Yang wouldn’t be a bad catch, I’d tell him to find another [partner], but he wouldn’t listen, he might have some issues”. His neighbors said that this incident wouldn’t influence their good opinion of old Yang, and in the future will try to have more neighborly communication [with him].

Reason for jumping: he had no one to talk to, life was too lonely

Upon arriving at the hospital, doctors said that the man involved did not have life threatening injuries, and had only broken two ribs and sustained light external injuries, and would be released after ten days’ observation.

By the time his interview began, old Yang’s mood had stabilised, and by just listening to him one would have never guessed that he had tried to kill himself not long before. When asked about why he chose suicide, old Yang said that he usually was alone, and that his life was too lonely. Now that his child is an adult and had his own life, he was only getting older and older, and didn’t want to become a burden to his child. When the topic of the smashed doll was brought up, old Yang was a little embarrassed, saying that ever since his child had gone overseas to study he has had no one to keep him company, and had no alternative but to buy an inflatable sex doll. Recently there have been many people online who denounce those tho play with such inflatable dolls as BT, but since he himself plays with one often, these words hurt him deeply, which is why he chose suicide.

Old Yang said: This time I wanted to die but didn’t, instead I’ve become a huge joke.  Now I won’t be able to even see people. But upon hearing his neighbors’ opinions, old Yang gradually calmed down, and said that he wouldn’t do such a stupid thing ever again.

Comments from NetEase:


You shouldn’t think too much.


When I first saw the photo of the exploded blow-up doll I felt like throwing up.


After reading I felt a bit a bit sad, “I think that playing with something like that isn’t a bad thing, better that than going and doing something not so clean” I think this is quite correct.


Everyone has the right to be happy, everyone’s definition of happiness isn’t the same, when laughing at others you should think about what you’re like.


Having a blow up doll in the house is a good idea.
When you’ve got nothing to do you can hold it in bed and have some fun.
When something’s wrong you can hold it in your arms and jump out of a window without dying.


The quality of blowup dolls are so great, you can play with them and they can even save your life!


Actually there’s nothing to be embarrassed about, it’s us who aren’t open minded. Entertainment for body and mind, nice one.


Where do you get one of those?


This is why we should support the opening up of the porn/sex industry.

Cures loneliness, but probably won’t save your life. chinaSMACK personals.


Written by maxiewawa

Native English speaker who'd like to make a living from translating some day. Until then continuing to teach English.