Young Man Kneels for 30+ Days Begging Girlfriend’s Forgiveness

A young Chinese man on his knees begging his girlfriend to forgive him.

From QQ:

Young Man Begs on His Knees for Girlfriend’s Forgiveness for Over 30 Days, Helped Up By Kind-Hearted City Residents

2014 November 6, Shandong province Dongying city, in front of a hair salon on Dongsan Road, a young man from Sichuan province has been kneeling on the ground for a long time refusing to get up, imploring his girlfriend who works in Dongying to change her mind. Many kind-hearted city resident were moved by what he was doing, and one after another they went forward to help him up. According to an observer, the young man has persisted in this kneeling entreaty for over a month now. Zhou Guangxue/Dongfang IC




Comments from QQ:


Usually guys who go to such extremes and persevere in doing so actually are that good anyway! He may be good to you at the time but if after marriage you do something that makes him unhappy, he’ll exhibit violent tendencies. These kind of people tend to be very extreme, so even if you can forgive him, I still don’t recommend that you marry him!


30 days of kneeling without getting up is disguised emotional blackmail and soft violence. Such a man is not actually dependable, their personality/disposition too extreme, and their post-marriage behavior impossible to predict. I hope the girl will think carefully before acting…


A loser, stopping to this will not end will. “There is gold beneath a man’s knees” [an idiom meaning a man should not casually kneel in supplication]. Live with dignity.


Young man, if you want your girlfriend to respect you, then you must respect yourself, and live [behave] like a man. You stubbornly kneeling down like this will just humiliate yourself, and your girlfriend will feel sorry but also frustrated with you even more. Wake up.


Loving each other has to be equal. If you’ve admitted to your mistake but your girlfriend won’t forgive you, then let it go. You hanging your head kneeling like this, is this you wanting to be a wuss? Does a real man fear not being able to find a woman?


I’m a woman and I can’t respect you [for this]. You’ve lost face for all men.


He’s sick in the head, and needs treatment.


Frightening. She doesn’t love you anymore, but you’re still kneeling there? Do you not have work? You only know how to date? It was you who made a mistake, so who would believe you won’t make a second mistake? Just leave by yourself. Go find your second love. Looking at this man, you can tell he has no promise. Right now, he’s not begging for forgiveness, he just wants to get revenge on his girlfriend.


2B, your girlfriend obviously doesn’t want you anymore.

Comments from NetEase:

最狠不过神补刀 [网易黑龙江省哈尔滨市手机网友]:

Young man, get up, I’ll marry you.

冲杯三鹿给档喝 [网易福建省泉州市手机网友]:

Even if you manage to get her back, she is no longer who she was. “There is gold beneath a man’s knees.”

中蝈玩妹协会叶主任 [网易福建省福州市手机网友]:

Those without money can only do this.

网易江苏省苏州市手机网友 ip:222.92.*.*

If you’re going to kneel, then knee three minutes, and if she doesn’t forgive you after three minutes, stop kneeling, it’s over, go home and give it a rest.

丶翰墨 [网易广东省深圳市手机网友]:

I came to read the comments, but I’ve come too early.

网易江西省手机网友 ip:113.194.*.*

“There is gold beneath a man’s knees.”

网易浙江省手机网友 ip:36.16.*.*


网易浙江省温州市手机网友 ip:122.228.*.*


166540082 [网易四川省手机网友]:


网易天津市手机网友 ip:221.238.*.*

I look down on men like this! Your mother gave birth to you and raised you just so you could kneel down for a woman? Stupid cunt! Have all the women in the world died out? Spineless garbage…

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  • Anonymous

    3 days = devoted
    30 days = deranged

    • 300 days = devoted
      3,000 days = open marriage (they see other people; he, the floor)

    • I like the comment above…
      “If you’re going to kneel, then knee three minutes, and if she doesn’t forgive you after three minutes, stop kneeling, it’s over, go home and give it a rest.”

  • Marshmellow

    the gf obviously don’t want to be with him anymore. Kneeling?? It’s a waste of time and Embarrassing.

  • Amused

    Dude. Find some dignity and get a new piece of ass. This is just sad when decent women are a dime a dozen in China.
    And next time don’t bang her sister you dipshit.

    • Dolph Grunt

      Cousin… this is China. One child policy.

      • AbC

        Doesn’t quite work that way. If you have a girl first, you can try again for another child.

        If you have money… You can have as many kids as you want.

        • Caddy

          That didn’t go like that in the past. This is just a recent modification of the one child policy….if it’s true. You wouldn’t be braking the law if you had twins but after that you wouldn’t be able to have children anymore….at least that how it was in the past.

      • Amused

        They all call their female cousins their “sister” tho.

        • AbC

          Only if they are on the dad’s side, and only the daughters of the dad’s brothers. The cousins on the mother’s side or the children of your father’s sisters are still cousins.

          Kind of odd that all female relations are considered ‘lesser’. Going back some generations, it was common for the Chinese to marry their ‘cousins’ (those not children of the father’s brothers).

          • I have a friend (in China) who calls her younger cousin her little Sister and she is her Aunt’s (Father’s younger Sister) daughter

          • AbC

            I was talking more on formalities. Most people don’t address their cousins as ‘cousin’. Any girl younger can be called ‘little sister’ and vice versa as a form of ‘closeness’, no relations required.

          • David

            I just asked my Chinese friend about this and she confirmed what you said. The reason she gave was that her father’s brother (if he has one) would have the same family name and so would his kids, but the mother’s sibling would not. I am much more familiar with this sort of behavior in Korea, where where close friends are often introduced as sister or brother.

          • Amused

            Most ML Chinese English speakers don’t have “cousin” in their vocabulary man. Not sure if that’s why they call them all “sister” or not.

          • AbC

            In China… Women call almost anyone 姐 ‘sister’ (quite often used in conjunction with their name). That includes cousins, work colleagues, friends and etc. The word ‘cousin’ is only used as a form of introduction much like we don’t normally call our cousins ‘cousin’.

          • Zappa Frank

            My wife call them sisters and brothers as well

          • AbC

            Then you can confirm what I am saying with your wife. She probably use sister/brother informally to address anyone close to her. Technically, they should be 表妹,表姐 etc, which means cousin, and it’d be used as an introduction to third parties.
            Often, a group of female friends would call themselves 姐妹们(sisters), or a group of male friends 兄弟们 (brothers), just a way of expressing “we’re close like family”.

          • Kai

            Really? I’m not familiar with there being a distinction between dad and mom’s side. Formally, it’s either 堂 and 表 but informally, and in my experience, mainlanders have referred to cousins on either side as “brothers” and “sisters”.

          • AbC

            堂is actually an expression of an extension of your family whereas 表signifies someone outside your family. It’s basically a form of wording that extends from the Chinese view that a female gets ‘married out’ 嫁出去,whereas for a male, it’s 娶进来 (marry in a wife).
            This is further emphasised when you call your grandparents in your mum’s side 外公and外婆,or when your uncle/aunts refer to you as 外甥. (外literally meaning outside or external).

          • Kai

            Oh, I am aware of the patriarchal terms and expressions. I just meant I’m not familiar with mainlanders only referring to cousins only on their dad’s side as “brother/sister” but not cousins on their mother’s side. In my experience, they’ve freely referred to cousins of both sides as “brother/sister” in casual use.

          • AbC

            Casual use perhaps. But it’s actually customary and expected for you to refer to the kids of your father’s brothers as 哥,姐 etc. whereas it’s probably just nice to refer to your other cousins as sis/bro.

            When you are introducing your dad’s brother’s kids to someone or referring to them in third person, you don’t actually need to say 堂哥,堂姐 etc, it’s generally accepted to refer to them as your brother/sister(我哥,我姐). The same cannot be said of your other cousins. There’s a clear distinction.
            (Sorry, I don’t mean to sound anal about it and I know it’s defintely going off-topic as well).

          • Kai

            Interesting, I’ve never actually encountered what you’re saying but I’ll ask around.

            No worries, you don’t sound anal about it. I see this as possibly learning something I didn’t know.

        • Stefan

          When I was together with my Chinese ex girlfriend I called her sister and she called me brother.

          • Alex Dương

            Really? Hmm.

          • David

            Well, that does not work well for westerners.

          • Dr Sun

            that’s creepy

  • Surfeit


  • Xia

    Buying a new car or a new house would produce a much more favorable result.

    • Or a foreign passport….

      • I think more Chinese women would prefer to stay in China these days (of course a house and car are expected).
        30 years ago, they probably dreamed of leaving because that usually meant a better life, but today there is comfort/mental safety staying in China.

        • Amused

          Some definitely. I’ve been trying to convince the wife that America is the place for us for 4 years now and not getting to far. But her reasons are that her business relations and govt friends aren’t in the US more than comfort and safety.

          • I did not use “safety” – I used “mental safety” because I couldn’t think of the word I’m looking for…
            but to further elaborate, I would say peace of mind, ease of living.
            moving to a new place is a struggle – I know I experience it when I am in China. I am a fish out of water and even the normal experiences at home are more of a task/effort in China. Eventually that would change, but a lot of people don’t want to go thru this time/effort/BS if they don’t have to.

          • Xia

            Perhaps you mean convenience and familiarity. Going abroad is for those with adventurous spirit. Just think about what it takes for a foreigner to go to China.

          • Time is Finite. Make the most of every today, whatever that means to you.
            We often forget that someday we’ll be dead and being a slave to the almighty “dollar” was the wrong choice.

          • Kai

            That suggests she’s quite pragmatic and career-oriented? Beats a wife who just seeks comfort.

        • donscarletti

          Back in the late 90s when western men were at their peak of popularity, women didn’t necessarily want to leave china as part of the deal.

          These days the advantages remain about the same:
          – Greater income on average, excluding English Teachers of course. Gap has closed slightly in the last decade, but still remains.
          – Inherent or easily established safety net in his home country, even if she doesn’t _really_ have any plans to go there,
          – Far easier access to high quality education for their children, both in China or abroad.
          – De-facto exemption from population control laws.
          – Have someone to assist her in learning foreign languages, useful for work and travel.
          And finally and most importantly:
          – Groom’s family will generally stay out of her affairs.

          The main disadvantage has remained constant:
          – Much less capable at sorting out everyday issues, due to lack of knowledge, poor language skills and lack of connections.

          As property prices have gone up, a pair of new disadvantage has emerged, which you see quoted online:
          – Less likely to own property in large city.
          – Unable to utilise parents money to buy property.

          But I think having a good husband, even if he is foreign, will make a Chinese woman LESS interested in leaving China. China’s a pretty awesome place to be if you are young and have a good income. This applied even more in years gone by, when the country was more open, more money focussed, more corrupt and a white guy could be guaranteed a well paying job even if he was a complete idiot.

          • As a foreigner, Would you be concerned about investing long term into China? Or do you always have your eye on the exit, counting down the days until you leave?

      • Spoiler Alert

        Or 99 iphone 6s.

  • “How you supposed to get bitches if you’re a bitch yourself?” – Confucius

    • mr.wiener

      There is gold beneath a mans knees…and shite between his ears.

    • don’t seek bitches, or pay the price

  • Jazz88

    Its amazing to see how much the consciousness of the Chinese commenters has shifted over time. 10 years ago, there would have been much more sympathy for this man. Now people are clear in identifying him for what he is, a slightly unhinged, creepy, “emotional blackmailer.”

    Glad to see it.

    • Comments are handpicked and can never be taken to represent all the feelings, hurt as they may be, of China.

      But say you’re right, and as the majority says, this guy is “emotionally blackmailing” this woman into marrying him. Not to justify him, but there’s not much more this guy can do but “go extreme”, as many bad Chinese solutions go when things don’t work out.

      Chinese women aren’t looking for love when getting married, they’re looking for a good husband–a practical decision that is all about “security” and support and not about love. If this guy can’t make enough money to buy a shiny black car, and he can’t appeal to her sense of love for him, well then the last thing he can do is guilt this woman into being his wife.

      • Amused

        “Chinese women aren’t looking for love when getting married”
        Not necessarily. Sure, gold digging whores are thicker on the ground in China than most any place in the world, but there are some damn good women here as well.

        Don’t paint them all with the same brush.

        • Unless you’re willing to grant me complete infallacy on all my precious opinions, I’m totally willing to grant that there be exceptions. It’s just a tiresome chore to write IMHO or AFAIK or whatever all the time, and its just the same tiresome chore to give in this tiny point on whomever calls it out.

          Just the same: I did not call Chinese women “gold digging whores”, and that wasn’t what I was trying to say. There is a sense of practicality when it comes to Chinese marriages that when arranging for them (both personally and through matchmaking), the idea of a “perfect match” through “fate” is not one of romantic love, but of practical circumstances. A Chinese woman wants a man that fits her life, and that means a good economic match.

          Gold digging whore territory is when these women buck modesty and try to land a catch outside their mandated fate.

          • Amused

            As a guy I’ve always felt that any chick that is interested in you for you situation(be it financial or citizenship wise) is a gold digging whore. Perhaps the terminology IS a bit harsh, but I didn’t invent it. But, guys do tend to despise this kind of woman. Probably because most of us started out without the finer things and had to work our asses off for them. And it wouldn’t enter the average western guy’s mind to chase a woman for her cash.

            Instead we chase for her banging body or angelic face, at least until we have enough years on us to know that a personality you want to wake up next to for 40 years is far more important.

            Terribly shallow as well I know, and women have plenty of nice things to call us for the tendency.

          • Alex Dương

            But, guys do tend to despise this kind of woman.

            What’s your take on “trophy wives”?

          • Amused

            They generally belong to a poor sad shell of a man with the emotional depth of a cup of water.

          • Alex Dương

            I don’t like “gold diggers” myself, but clearly there are some guys out there who don’t care (e.g. anyone who was ever involved in any kind of relationship with Wendi Deng.)

            On a separate note, I have to ask you a question since you upvoted Yes!’s reply to me in the, ahem, “crotchless pants” comments. Do you think there’s any difference between what he’s saying and what was said back in the day when people argued for formal restrictions on Chinese immigration and informal restrictions on Japanese immigration to the U.S.?

            If you do, what are they? If you don’t, then why is it different this time around?

          • Amused

            Sure, lemme go over to that post tho bro. And….. clarified?

          • David

            Trying to get restrictions on Chinese immigration in the U.S. in the mid 19th century (like the Chinese Exclusionary act of 1882) was based on competition for labor, same as today. In places where few Asians went (like the East coast) they were generally accepted as well as any immigrant group (i.e. tolerated) but in the west, they were seen as competing for jobs and hated (some difference circumstance with the Japanese who immigrated generally in the early 20th century and Filipinos who came after we colonized the islands).

          • Alex Dương

            I agree that labor competition was the true cause, and the racism – though real in the sense that people believed in and acted on it – was “just” an excuse. I think in Yes!’s case, this is still the true cause in Singapore. I would wager that even if the mainland Chinese immigrants spoke English, he’d still feel resentment; he’d just find some other excuse to justify it, be it manners, some other aspect of the “different cultural mindset,” whatever.

          • Foreign Devil

            Right, a guy to marries a women for her looks alone is just a shallow and the woman who marries a guy for his wealth alone.

          • “Gold digging whore” is an expat term, same as the type of perspective you’re slinging. Meanwhile, Chinese women live in a society where practicality is paramount, to the point where looking for a good husband means looking for a good provider.

            For all the “equality” that Chinese women have gained, its their youth and beauty that matter. They’re willing to use their “banging body” to get this “sense of security” from men since that’s the way it is.

            Want to marry a Chinese woman? Be prepared to hand over your bank card, the deed to your house, and the keys to your car–on the first date.

          • Amused

            “Want to marry a Chinese woman? Be prepared to hand over your bank card,
            the deed to your house, and the keys to your car–on the first date”

            I’d say 80-90 percent of them DO fall into this category if you’re an average Zhou in ML China trying to get with them. But that’s a situation said “average Zhou” has heaped on himself.

            If you won’t commit to a woman enough that she knows you aren’t going to cheat on her and give her emotional security, then she’ll get her security the material way. And cheating amongst Chinese men seems just as institutional as gold bricking amongst the ladies.

      • I have met a lot of “traditional” women in China who are much less materialistic than “Western” women.
        I have several (Chinese) friends who have ended relationships because they didn’t love the man even though he was “wealthy”.
        With that said, most women want safety/security, so it can’t hurt to be able to provide economically

        • You make it sound like thiese (Chinese) friends chose not being in a loveless relationship rather than make an immediate switch to someone who can provide security.

          • correct. They ended those relationships because they did not love the men, not because they met someone richer.
            If they only cared about being with a rich man, then many of them would not have ended those relationships.
            These are some of the people I know, not every woman in China, so in a country with hundreds of millions of women, I’m sure we could find all kinds

      • Jazz88

        That’s a sweeping generalization about Chinese women, and I don’t accept it, as it doesn’t include any of the women that I count as my friends.

        • terroir

          Not married yet? You’ll wind up marrying one of them.

          Married already?

          • Jazz88

            Nope, and I won’t marry a local girl. That’s mainly because I just don’t feel comfortable around them though; they don’t understand all my jokes, I don’t get their jokes.

  • firebert5

    He should get together with the girl from a week or so ago who painted herself up like an old woman. They seem made for each other.

  • Modern China – a land without kings, full of the latest iteration of the iPhone, full of towers, bridges, and constantly refurbished infrastructure – is a stone’s throw away from feudal China, where everyone has a class and rank, where everything has a price, and kneeling and bowing is what happens when you’re in trouble.

  • 금정산

    I’m curious to know what happened. Did he steal her earrings?

    • Amused

      She probably caught him wearing her underwear.

  • AbC

    He must have lied about being rich when he has no money. No amount of kneeling will bring her back.

    Any guy with considerable wealth in China will not kneel for a woman to take him back. Let alone for 30 days.

    (P.s. The only time a man should kneel for a lady is a marriage proposal. If you have done wrong, and an apology isn’t good enough, you have already lost your chance, kneeling and begging is just disrespecting yourself).

    • Stefan

      Any guy with considerable wealth in China will not kneel for a woman to take him back.


      • AbC

        If you have wealth and some level of self-respect, you know there will be other fish in the sea. Wealth and self-respect (and often arrogance) comes almost hand in hand.
        I’ve seen people kneel to their parents… But it’s embarasing and a ‘lost of face’ to be seen kneeling to pretty much anyone else, especially a younger woman.

      • AbC

        (Read that last Netease comment, I’d wager most men in China would think along that line).

  • Small twon

    I think it’s another form of stalking and pressure tactic by disturbed man.

    • This tactic probably would not work in the USA…probably get tasered.

  • Irvin

    If she don’t care, why should you?

  • Teacher in China

    I was relieved to hear so much vitriol in the comments. I half expected to be reading about how romantic everyone thought this was. I’ve seen some guys do really ridiculous things to make their gf/wives happy….and girls generally seem to dig it. Wonder if this one ended up taking him back?

  • You have to wonder what he did that required so much more than a bunch of flowers.

  • What a metrosexual…. or should that be SNAG? Women want boyfriends (re: Men) not sensitive confident emotional beings, they have their girlfriends for that.

  • Zappa Frank

    But he didn’t work for 30days??

    • Surfeit

      Lazy horse!

    • They cropped the hat and sign (“Please Give”) out of the photo – HaHa

  • Irvin

    Mainlanders treat their gf like they do grudges, they don’t know when to let go.

  • Kneeling (IN PUBLIC) is a bit extreme, but What is wrong with carrying something for your girlfriend?

  • icup ✔️

    30 days my ass. probably only was kneeling for an hour each day.

  • JayJay

    The result of gender unbalance in China… that made men bitches…

  • Foreign Devil

    The gender imbalance issue is starting to hit home in China…

  • Ktrang

    man like that nowadays is so pathetic!

  • commander

    If one act self-deprecatingly to the detriment of one’s self esteem, it will be highly likely to backfire when one realize later that they didn’t have to do that, and that it wasn’t worth at all.

    The regret could shade into anger over oneself, then turn resentment at someone with whom one was desperately trying to restore ties again.

    If the young man committed an irrevocably grave mistake for his girl friend, so he felt he needs to beseech for her to come back to me, she would be unlikely to return into his embrace. Even if she did, past cracks in the relationship between the two could break up again in the foreseeable future.

    If the entreating guy was kneeling on the street to satisfy his girl friend’s whim, a similar occurrence would be likely again down the road.

    As two conceivable cases point to a bitter break-up, he’d better now get back to his home, soothing his broken heart in other ways.

  • Andrew Cooler Can

    Chinese men are so pansy these days. I don’t expect any revolution to overthrow the communist gov’t like they tried back in 1989 at Tian. Square. At least hong kongers still have balls to protest.

  • B.I.G. Forever

    He needs to get back to Foxconn because I still don’t have my iPhone Plus yet.

  • Peter

    Best to go your own way. A man needs a woman like a fish needs a bicycle.

  • utera

    I’m sure there are better selections of such videos out there explaining the mentality of that young man, but it all goes back to the mistake men make of worshiping women, that man does not value himself in any way to debase himself like that. While he is extreme, his mindset is not uncommon in society.

  • John Brookes

    when a woman in china dumps a man, he should just casually dismiss her attitude or merely saying ok bye bye. Then walk away and not look back… Or just say fine bye bye

    • Alex Dương

      I think that’s how it should be done everywhere.

  • Frank Kush

    Somebody needs to go help reattach this guys testicles. Truly sad and pathetic…

  • Caddy

    In China there is a shortage of women. This means that it’s hard to get another woman.

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